How 2 say I'm PG when brother is TTC?
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How 2 say I'm PG when brother is TTC?
| Fri, 07-18-2003 - 2:43pm |
Hi there. I just found out I am pregnant, and my husband and I are ecstatic. We had thought about trying at the end of summer but it looks like mother nature upped the due date! Anyway, we are thrilled about this, but now we have a problem - how to tell his brother and sister-in-law who have been TTC since last year. They discovered they had problems and now she has just started IVF treatments. They're going to try the first implantation on Aug. 10. By that time I will be over 2 months pregnant.
My questions are: 1. How do we tell them we're pregnant without hurting their feelings/adding anxiety before their implantation, and
2. When do we tell them? Do we wait until after implantation?
Thanks for your advice!

I'm sorry that your BIL and SIL are having troubles, and I'm trying to put myself in their shoes (which isn't too hard; we just started working with an IF specialist). The day they find out probably WILL be a stressful one to them - particularly her - no matter how you break the news. When my close friend Julie announced she was pregnant - she and her DH "did the deed" the first cycle - I cried for three days. When I recently found out a college acquaintance was expecting, I cried for a day, then spent the better part of a week feeling depressed. Fortunately I've got a GREAT husband, but it's still not easy.
I'm afraid I don't have any suggestions re: timing of your announcement. Normally I'd suggest trying to wait until later in your first trimester - I've had good friends who have waited until week 12 - but I suppose it will be hard to wait that long! I'm an IVF-idiot... when will they know if that one "stuck" or not? Maybe announce after they know?
Good luck, and sprinkle some of that baby-dust on your SIL! (Maybe your child will have a cousin!)
Tami
Mommy to Anna 7.7.04 & Ben 11.19.06
My husband and I are of course very happy, but we just wanted to make sure to do the right thing. His family (he has an older brother and younger sister) are very close and have Sunday dinner every week at their parents' house. At the beginning of last summer, BIL and SIL stood up and announced they were going to try that summer to conceive. Naturally, we were all on pins and needles, expecting an announcement last fall or winter, but nothing. That's why my husband and I feel a little guilty because though we had talked about having kids, we didn't expect to get pregnant right away. We don't want them to think we did this for spite (which is a horrible thing to say, I know). And I know that SIL is going to take it hard and be a little jealous. Heck, if I were in her shoes, *I* would be jealous at first too! The main thing is that I don't want to upset them and I hope they'll be happy for us, just like we're praying for them.
I don't know how long you have to wait after IVF to know if it stuck or not. But like you said, maybe we'll both have happy news to celebrate!
Thanks again for your advice and good luck!
~*~*Congratulations to you!!!! ~*~*~*~* GL with your decision,
((((((HUGS)))))
Tara
Tara~ co-cl of Pregnant after TTC
HTH!
Cassie
TTC#1
And congrats on your great news!!! Have a happy, healthy 9 months!!
Christi