Kerry resume

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-05-2003
Kerry resume
5
Sat, 07-31-2004 - 9:27pm
Thought it'd be interesting to stop discussion of the various mysteries of Kerry's Vietnam tour, and look at how Kerry has groomed himself to be President... lets look at his record... a proposed resume follows....


Resume of John F Kerry

of the Boston Kerry's



Position sought - President of the United States

Record of accomplishments in the Senate

__________________________________________

EDUCATION

Educated at Swiss Boarding Schools -- like virtually all americans are today

Attended elite private schools like Fessenden School in West Newton, Massachusetts and St. Paul's in New Hampshire -- just like your kids

Graduated Yale University, 1966 (I am much smarter than that Bush guy -- oh, wait, he also went to Yale.)

Graduated Boston College Law School in 1976 (I am much smarter than that Bush guy -- oh, wait, he got an MBA from Harvard.)

POST VIETNAM SERVICE

Co-founder of the VIETNAM Veterans of America and spokesperson for the VIETNAM Veterans Against the War and worked closely with Jane Fonda to make sure everyone knew that all the guys in VIETNAM were war criminals -- I was too, and even testified before the Senate about my own war crimes.

"Represented" my cadre of anti-American misfits in a Paris meeting to discuss how we could better provide "aid and comfort" for the North Vietnamese and to discuss the unconditional surrender of the U.S. In doing so, I knowingly, directly violated UCMJ Article 104 part 904, and U.S. Code 18 U.S.C. 953.



Did I mention that this meeting, and my other anti-American activities, also put me in violation of the Constitution's Article three, Section three, which defines treason as "giving aid and comfort" to the enemy in time of warfare.

Consequently, I stand subject to the Constitution's Fourteenth Amendment, Section 3, which states, "No person shall be a Senator or Representative in Congress, or elector of President and Vice-President...having previously taken an oath...to support the Constitution of the United States, engaged in insurrection or rebellion against the same, or given aid or comfort to the enemies thereof."

But I don't have to resign -- I am understudy to Teddy Kennedy, now the patriarch of JFK's family.

I topped off my coddling of Commies by authoring a book called The New Soldier -- but since military heroes are back in vogue, I now sue anyone who reproduces the cover of that book on any website.

CONGRESSIONAL "SERVICE"

Volunteered as a campaign worker for my mentor, Teddy Kennedy in 1962. I just love that big lug!

My first campaign for Congress was in 1972 -- I was a war hero like JFK but nobody noticed so I ran on my anti-American platform. I won the primary with a little help from my campaign manager (brother Cameron) who broke into my opponents campaign headquarters. Unfortunately, because of that Watergate thing, I lost the general election to a Republican even after spending more than any other Congressional campaign in the nation.

In 1982, with the help of Uncle Teddy, I got elected as lieutenant governor for governor Michael Dukakis -- then got elected to the Senate in 1984 -- it has been smooth sailing ever since. I have dedicated the last 20 years, between wives and vacation homes, promoting big government spending (except in defense and intelligence, which I vote against every chance I get), class warfare, the welfare state and general wealth redistribution, any kind of abortion on demand (without parental consent for minors), and obstructionist tactics in the judicial nominee process.

According to Americans for Democratic Action, a far-left watchdog group, I have a higher lifetime liberal voting record at 93% than Ted Kennedy with 88%

I am the ranking Democrat member of the Committee on Small Business and Entrepreneurship. My current millionaire wife is heiress of the Heinz Ketchup fortune -- a "small" business

Ranking member of the Hispanic Task Force, even though I "borked" Miguel Estrada


POLITICAL POSTURING AND ACCOMPLISHMENTS:

ABORTION

Voted to federally fund abortions

Voted against parental consent for minors

Voted against ban on Partial Birth Abortion (3 times)

Voted against ban on sending money to UN population fund -- the money was sent to pay for China's forced abortion and sterilization policy

Have been warned by Catholic clergy that I will not be served communion due to my stance on this issue

NARAL lifetime rating of 100%; National Right to Life Committee lifetime rating of 0%

DEATH PENALTY

Oppose federal and/or state death penalty (except for innocent unborn children -- see above)

Voted against death penalty for terrorists

Voted against death penalty for drug-related murders

TAXES & ECONOMICS

I like high taxes and want to raise them

Voted against all three Bush tax cuts & want to repeal them

Voted for 1993 Clinton tax hike (largest in history)

Voted against major tax relief packages at least 10 times

Support re-raising taxes on the wealthy to redistribute money for healthcare and education -- i.e., Socialism

Claim I can stop outsourcing and create 10 million new jobs in four years, despite the fact that there are only about 8 million unemployed people in the U.S.

Want to raise the minimum wage, which will result in outsourcing and the loss of jobs

Voted at least 5 times against balanced budget amendments

Voted at least 5 times to raid the Social Security Trust Fund

Believe Washington manages your money better than you could

Lifetime rating of 26% from Citizens Against Government Waste

MILITARY & NATIONAL SECURITY

We don't need a military, per se

Favor UN control of remaining U.S. Troops

Voted for 7 major reductions in military funding

Voted against Gulf War I (1991)

Voted for Gulf War II -- but then criticized and voted against Bush request for military appropriation of troops, while complaining Bush didn't adaquately fund troops needs

Voted against MX missile, Trident Submarine, SDI (Strategic Defense Initiative -- Star Wars), and the B-1 and B-2 Stealth Bomber/Fighter and virtually all system upgrades

Supported slashing $2.6 billion from intelligence funding while serving as a member of Senate Intelligence Committee

Had access to the same intelligence information Bush did when he fooled everyone and got me to vote for war against Iraq. Despite the obviousness of any claim I may make against Bush indicating I was either neglectful or dumber than Bush, I can still lash out at him due to the intolerance and hatred of my many supporters.

SECOND AMENDMENT

Against, it isn't really a part of the Constitution, I mean the words are there and all, but we just pretend to not know what it's saying. The 2nd Amendment can't be all that important anyway, look how far down it is in the order of Amendments of the Bill of Rights.

Have earned a lifetime rating of 0% from the National Rifle Association

FAITH & VALUES

Against/Don't have any

Voted Against Defense of Marriage Act

Favor civil unions for homosexuals until marriage is popular enough to support

Voted to extend hate crimes protections to homosexuals

Voted against voluntary school prayer

Voted against ban on human cloning and support embryonic stem-cell research

EDUCATION

Voted against voucher pilot program

Voted against approving a school-choice pilot program

Support racial profiling and preference for admission to universities, known as "affirmative action"

JUDGES, COURTS & LAW

Against racial profiling and preference when dealing with terrorism

Voted against confirmation William Rehnquist as Chief Justice of the Supreme Court

Voted against confirmation of Robert Bork and Clarence Thomas to the Supreme Court

Only support activist judges who will support abortion, persecute Christians and rewrite the Constitution

Voted against confirmation John Ashcroft as U.S. Attorney General

Voted against punitive damage limits in products liability cases

As Michael Dukakis' Lt. Governor from 1983-1985, supported granting prison furloughs to hundreds of Massachusetts inmates

FOREIGN POLICY

Against linking Most Favored Nation status to China's human rights record

Voted for Kyoto Protocol on Environment that exempted major Third World polluters, while creating an unfair burden on American taxpayers

Supported Iraq regime change as late as January 2003, but not anymore

Support unilateral nuclear freeze

Support submitting completely to the UN, as well as the International Criminal Court, taking all sovereignty away from the U.S. and its citizens

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-08-2003
In reply to: truemobile
Sun, 08-01-2004 - 8:00am
About as effective as the Bush resume that used to go around, less so in fact.

It's a good thing Bush's record from 2001 - Present is what counts the most.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-05-2003
In reply to: truemobile
Sun, 08-01-2004 - 9:53am
Ohh, I think as people start to look at Kerry this type of information will help them decide... the guy's a complete phoney... who has done more harm than good during his tenure as a Senator... mostly he's been interested in himself, his wives... his estates and what not. An environmentalist who files in his own private LARGE get everywhere, who owns fleets of SUV's... yup... makes sense.... NOT.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-08-2003
In reply to: truemobile
Sun, 08-01-2004 - 10:43am
Sure, and the Bush campaign agrees with you.

That's why they spent an unprecedented 110 million dollars so they could spread that all over the television airwaves.

Never before, have we seen so many commercials, so many messages on why we should avoid Kerry like the plague, why Kerry is this, why Kerry is that.

What did it get Bush/Cheney? 15 points DROPPED from their approval rating!

If you believe sliming the opponent means more than running on your record, please KEEP believing it!

We saw Bush/Quayle do the same thing, and they did it against: A draft dodging, war protesting (From the USSR no doubt), lying, soon to be disbarred, womanizing, pot smoking crooked business man from a small and insignificant state.

Quit running your mouths and start running the country!

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-05-2003
In reply to: truemobile
Sun, 08-01-2004 - 12:47pm
I believe Kerry and friends have outspent Bush to this point... problem for Kerry is Rove... who understands what needs to be done to win... my guess is the nastyness of Kerry's crew is going to look like sunday school teasing by the time the horror that is John Kerry is fully exposed by Rove :-)
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-08-2003
In reply to: truemobile
Fri, 08-06-2004 - 11:25am
--

I believe Kerry and friends have outspent Bush to this point... problem for Kerry is Rove... who understands what needs to be done to win... my guess is the nastyness of Kerry's crew is going to look like sunday school teasing by the time the horror that is John Kerry is fully exposed by Rove :-)

--

Eh?

How is Rove even on his game? His strategy was to run 3 months of Anti-Kerry ads at a cost of 110 - 120 MILLION DOLLARS to hammer down Kerry's ratings and boost Bush's.

What did they get? Bush's approval rating drops 15 pts during those same 3 months.

Fast forward to now: Fox news has Bush's approval at 44, Satisfaction level of the country even less and Kerry's approval rating at 57!!

Yeah, Kerry's really being SCHOOLED by Rove :)

Maybe if they stopped running their mouths and started running the country....

Naw, they won't :)

Keep throwing the slime.... It's going great!!