venting and questions.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-07-2004
venting and questions.
18
Thu, 03-04-2004 - 11:13am
Ya'll...

I am going through some major insecurity right now. Believe me when I say that I do believe Jeff when he said some things but I am still confused on why. This is when the old voices come back adn really try and knock me down.

I don't understand and I am not sure that I am what he thinks I am. I am usually very secure in my looks but this is the old junk coming back to haunt me. I am beyond nervous and on edge about this.

For those who have dealt with this...how??? And is it hard to really accept a man's compliment when you look at the other gals running around in -10 and wonder if he means it?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-07-2004
Thu, 03-04-2004 - 12:07pm
Let me tellyou just cause they are met at church doesn't mean they don't think with that HEAD. Guys there have more hormonal problems than guys not there. I think it's the abstaning from it....he he he

Perhaps...but goodness I have 60 pounds on this guy. It's just hard not to look down and go I'm the girl I am suppossed to be lighter.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-07-2004
Thu, 03-04-2004 - 12:11pm
That's my prayer. You know I am feeling a bit better and knowing that what I am feeling is natural thing that many of us fight is good to know. I am not so alone in this fight.

One thing for sure, I will prevail. I am not going to let me stupidity mess up something that has the potential to be amazing. Of course my natural hyperness might have a hand in messing everything up. AKKK I texted him already today and basically said know you are busy but wanted to say hi have a great day. Talk about being a goof!!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-07-2004
Thu, 03-04-2004 - 12:12pm
Tina...

See it just is weird to hear it. I want to look at him and ask what do I need to pay his agent. I have been told how sweet I am and how kind and beautiful. It's like dude I am a dork with a goofball sense of humor and let's not touch upon the temper.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-04-2004
Thu, 03-04-2004 - 12:22pm
That's not being a goof. You should have seen some of the things that I did when I first met Jose. He owned a gas station, and I would leave work and see his car there, and I would have a full tank of gas, but I would go and buy a pack of gum just so that I could say hi to him. How many packs of gum can one person buy in a week LOL? Also, after our first date, I sent a friend of mine over to buy himself a pack of cigarettes so that he could get information for me (they knew each other and were kind of friends). Then I called the gas station looking for him (the friend) and ended up talking with Jose instead. Pathetic, isn't it? But things worked out. So don't worry about text messaging him, he was probably happy to hear from you.

~~Linda

~~Linda

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-07-2004
Thu, 03-04-2004 - 12:31pm
You are probably right. Guys get all happy over things like that. I am trying to stay away from bugging since he is a VP but it's hard not to do what comes naturally to me.

And I have already done all the recon. Good to have a friend you grew up with very close to the guy you want to date. Evil chuckle :)

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-20-2003
Thu, 03-04-2004 - 1:03pm
Only 60lbs on him??? Fear not! I have exactly 100 lbs on my b/f and 2 inches height, which is about 4-6 in when I wear heels. He's a little thing! hehehe :)

I was at my heaviest when we met Sept 02. 260lbs. I dropped 25lbs and by Jan I was calling him asking him out. We didn't do the dirty until a couple mos later and I had only lost another couple of lbs. But he was constantly telling me I was beautiful. I had been w/o a b/f for 8 yrs thanks to my ex who put me down and called me names, heck I was no where near my highest weight when I was with that loser. But I found comfort in food and ballooned! My current and I have been together a yr and I admit I got comfy and gained a little. He understands my trying to lose, but tells me if I never lose the weight he doesn't mind. He's only concerned for my health problems. He kisses my trouble areas and tells me he loves me. I had a VERY hard time beleiving him in the beginning, even now sometimes.

I took him to a strip club last weekend. (NOT full nudity!!) Neither of us have ever been and were curious. Of course all those girls are like 90lbs. I felt a very insecure, but noticed alot of other women there. And b/f wasn't even interested, didn't even get turned on. TMI? Anyway, he kept telling me I was WAY prettier than any of them. I didn't agree...but he insisted.

The next day we talked. He told me it's not my body that interests him. Well except for my chicha's (boobs)!! He's never had such big ones! :D It's my heart and mind. It's everything I am on the inside. He said I am beatiful, but what truely matters to him is that we can have a conversation about life or just laugh about things together. Just basically be together metally, not just physically. That's the most wonderful thing he could say!

Karrie, take this man for what he is. Don't over analyze him. Don't try to find hidden meanings behind his words. You'll just be wasting time. Have fun! Be yourself, that's who he's falling for!

Jessica

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-07-2004
Thu, 03-04-2004 - 1:11pm
Jessica...

Again you are another right. He is taller than I am in 4 inch heels so I am happy about that.

Man, ya'll are just being so great and uplifting! :) I am at ease. And to be honest ya'lls words of encouragement have helped me remember the things he has said to me. Sweet, kind, just the way I light up a room...of course the 42 d's and red hair help a great deal!

I am truly calming down and that voice from granddaddy is going away. I will tell ya'll that the one demon that is still fussing with me is the ex hubby to be. I so don't want to hear that "i don't love you enough" again, BUT I am not letting it stop me. I am going to get this date for this weekend set up even if i have to promise him a little hanky panky....like that's going to hurt me. And the BC is still no sex before the pastor says man and wife

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-06-2003
Thu, 03-04-2004 - 1:34pm

OH OH..Is it my turn to kick your booty Kar?!?!? c'mere v!! lol...ya know I coudlnt give better advice than wheta all these beautiful women have already told you . I am backing up the statement 100% about men dont think like we do..they say things and mean it..and us women have to over analyze EVERYTHING...god we are such fickle creatures!!!

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