Anyone jealous of others weight loss?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2004
Anyone jealous of others weight loss?
10
Wed, 03-31-2004 - 11:27am
Ok, I hope no one will judge me by what I am going to confess here. I have a thyroid problem and I have to try like heck to lose weight. I have been working my butt off (literally) for eight months now and have lost 44 lbs. I have this friend who I work out with in the mornings and she has lost 60 lbs in nothing flat. It all came off so easily for her. While I am glad for her accomplishment, here is what makes it difficult and provokes my envy- We go to a small club where everyone knows each other quite well. Every single day, many different people just rave on and on about how much weight she has lost, how great she looks, etc, etc. Not a single person has said anything about my weight loss.

I know I should just be happy for her. I try so hard to focus on my own success and goals and to be my own cheerleader. I have even tried to just forget about myself and to compliment others at the club on their progress. But everyday when I constantly hear about how great she is doing, and I get no recognition, it really bothers me. I know I just need to forget about her and focus on what I'm trying to do, but it is hard with these constant reminders. I have even thought about switching clubs or going at a different time but I somehow think that would be copping out.

I guess it sounds like I am whining and feeling sorry for myself. Maybe I am. I'm just wondering how to overcome this, and if any of you have had to cope with similar situations and what you did. I would appreciate any advice!!!

Thanks for listening!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 03-31-2004 - 1:04pm
I dont think anyone will judge you at all.

  Shawna-- Proud Cl for 100 Pounds or More to Go 

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2004
Wed, 03-31-2004 - 1:30pm
Thank you Shawna!! Your comments helped me feel better. I started out at 247 lbs, now at 203. My friend started out at about the same weight, and she started getting noticed at about 20 lbs lost. I think part of it is that I'm just always in her shadow, know what I mean? I really do appreciate your comments, though.

Congratulations on your amazing weight loss! I'm new to this board, and I'm just really hoping I can learn from people like you, as well as offer support.

Hope you have an awesome day!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 03-31-2004 - 1:58pm
Well....Your 203 pounds!

  Shawna-- Proud Cl for 100 Pounds or More to Go 

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2004
Wed, 03-31-2004 - 3:22pm
Wow, you have such a great attitude!! Have you always been so upbeat, or is that a side effect of losing 93 pounds? I've never told my husband my actual weight. He has to know it's been over 200, but I just haven't ever disclosed that info. Funny, it's just a number. I think I will have a huge celebration the day I drop under 200. It could happen any time now!!

BTW, I went to your website and I couldn't pull up your 'after' pic. I'm sure you look fantastic and feel even better! Thank you for your words of encouragement!!

Have a great day!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 03-31-2004 - 4:05pm

Here are a few pics from Dec (the one with my best friend) and one from two weekends ago.

  Shawna-- Proud Cl for 100 Pounds or More to Go 

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2004
Wed, 03-31-2004 - 4:13pm
No, I've never been jealous of others accomplishments whether weight loss or other. I think the key, as you've already noted, is to focus on what you are doing. It's not a contest, nor a race. It's just your own decision to make better choices for yourself. And yes, I'd be happy for *the other woman* and her weight loss. Continued success to you!
Avatar for angelinoh
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-19-2003
Wed, 03-31-2004 - 6:45pm
i think it's human nature to want to get feedback and to get jealous at times but it's how you handle it that counts...just remember how good your doing and how it sucks how it's easier on others..Good luck with your loss
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2004
Wed, 03-31-2004 - 11:59pm
I guess I feel a little insecure sometimes and that doesn't help the jealousy. But I'm only human and I am trying to overcome it. You must be a secure person not to ever feel that way.

Really I am glad for her accomplishments, and very proud of her. But it can be discouraging to work so hard and never get any recognition, while she gets so much attention for something that did come much easier for her.

It's ok though, I just need to learn to give myself that recognition, instead of depending on other club members. That's why I'm here. To give and get support from others who struggle just like I do. This is just another one of those hurdles!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2004
Thu, 04-01-2004 - 12:02am
Wow, you look awesome. Good for you! I bet your hubby is real proud too!!
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2004
Thu, 04-01-2004 - 2:13pm
Oh, I understand. And I don't know whether "secure" describes me, but maybe it does. It's more like self-focused though. I mean, you are losing weight for YOU, right? Not to impress others, but because it's what you want to do to live longer, to enjoy every day you are alive more fully, etc. So if that's the motivation, then it really doesn't matter whether other people notice you or not. Right? You feel good because you are doing what you want to do, and the way you want to do it! And good for her, if she lost weight and if she gets noticed (and if she enjoys the attention, for that matter). But your success, and your ability to feel good about yourself along the way, is not dependent upon other people's pats on the back (or lack thereof). Do you see what I mean by "me focus." Keep up the good work!