so I have a question...

Avatar for suamomi
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-23-2001
so I have a question...
58
Fri, 04-09-2004 - 2:34pm
And I'll probably get blasted and all that but I have to ask.

Why is there so much animosity toward "skinny people" on this board?

I don't understand why people have no problem saying how snotty and judgemental skinny people are when they are being just as snotty and judgemental *toward* skinny people.

Why do you hate what you want to become? how do you know that skinny person isn't a formerly fat person? How do you know they are looking at you disgusted?

I know it's hard to imagine but skinny people have just as many body issues as fat people. It took me a long time to realize that...for a long time I wanted to smack the girls that said, "I hate this belly" as they lifted their shirt to reveal a perfectly fine "belly". But as women, we are taught to aim for unattainable perfection that doesn't exist.

I just think it's funny that so many people have a problem with skinny people when it is our goal to become "skinny".

JMHO...

Sarah

Sarah


 


iVillage Member
Registered: 06-13-2003
Fri, 04-09-2004 - 6:17pm
>If you go back through the "skinny people" posts you can pin-point the post that turns the >conversation that direction, and each time it will be one of the troll's personas making >that post.

Actually, one of the skinny bashing posts that I took offense to was posted by one of the regulars.

Avatar for coffee_bean123
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-17-2003
Fri, 04-09-2004 - 6:19pm
Which one?

Coffee Coffee 2 

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-08-2003
Fri, 04-09-2004 - 6:21pm
Actually coffee, if you would re-read my post it has nothing to do with whether people do or do not bash thin people. I was expressing that all women have body image issues whether they are thin or overweight. I also want to say that I dropped out of the seatbelt thing as soon as I realized that I was causing an issue with another poster and I apologized. I am not in any way new to posting, feel free to search for my other posts. I most often post on hot debates and atkins, but check in here almost daily. Vox turned me on to this board about 6 months ago when a certain party who "made it" was causing quite a ruckus. KSAS who did not realize that posting would upset so many
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-09-2003
Fri, 04-09-2004 - 6:22pm
Wait a minute… some people here are not here to get “skinny” but to lead a healthier life…. I don’t think I have seen any ones or many goal weight in the what you would call skinny category but just trying to get healthy….. And if we show frustrations its because someone had said done something and we feel we can talk to our support board about it…… and as most know unless you have never been overweight YOU ARE as a matter of fact treated differently by certain people…. Not all but some…. Just like if someone was very skinny someone might call them a skeleton its just that this is a 100 plus board so most people here have weight issues so it focuses on that aspect… Just the same if I was really tall and a shorter person mentioned something about my height or vice versa but this isn’t a height support board… and why not vent? The women here are going through similar problems or can lend a “SUPPORTING” word after all this is a support board���.. Most of us feel comfortable around each other we can talk about anything….. Even if its off topic…. It makes everyone feel more normal and lets everyone know weight loss isn’t the only subject to talk about….. We are not talking about everyone whos skinny or the issue of being skinny but if a person we have a problem with is skinny we going to say skinny if they are fat we will say fat if short then say it…. it’s a visualization tool…… now if your talking about a certain post then mention that not put everyone in that group… because then you are doing the same thing you are mentioning I have not been around as much so I miss a lot so I can totally be off my rocker here lol…..(wont be the first time) JMHO but never not post because you feel you will get blasted we are a open bunch of people that take everything the same unless you got big hair lol... hope everyone has a wonderful day……. Desiree
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-13-2003
Fri, 04-09-2004 - 6:23pm
>Which one?

I am not going to name names.

Avatar for coffee_bean123
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-17-2003
Fri, 04-09-2004 - 6:31pm

Actually coffee, if you would re-read my post it has nothing to do with whether people do or do not bash thin people. I was expressing that all women have body image issues whether they are thin or overweight.


You mean the one in this thread? So I can take you off the list of supporters to the OP? That was my point, that the author of the OP thought you were one of the supporters to her post.



I also want to say that I dropped out of the seatbelt thing as soon as I realized that I was causing an issue with another poster and I apologized.


That's fine, but it still doesn't change what I said in my post:



a new poster who is "skinny" and who first posted yesterday to debate the seat belt issue and then went on to debate the "skinny bashing" post


You are new to this board. I've seen your name before and I already knew you weren't new to iVillage.



KSAS who did not realize that posting would upset so many


Oh, come on! A regular poster to the Hot Topics Board, and one who came to this board specifically to follow the troll

Coffee Coffee 2 

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-19-2004
Fri, 04-09-2004 - 6:33pm
I have big hair! What do you mean knocking big haired people?!?!? We have feelings too!Some us are just born with big hair...we can't help it...even cutting doesn't help...it just grows back bigger! Let's try and be a little more sensitive...shall we?!

:)
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-03-2003
Fri, 04-09-2004 - 6:34pm
Pardon me ladies while I flop my way in here....Maybe 'animosity' wasn't the most appropriate word, but I think attitude, self-esteem, a secret desire to want somthing very badly are all factors in why skinny and fat alike pick on each other.

I feel that when you bash an individual or a group, it can stem from lack of empathy, lack of understanding, general prejudice, or fear. I have seen both sides of this at work, for instance the Victoria's Secret girl (who was SKINNY) giving me the lip curl, hairy eyeball and huff. She saw me as FAT, and EATING CHOCOLATE. How dare I ? She can't, because SHE WOULD END UP LIKE ME. (Personally, one of me is enough.)

I see alot of fat people under the delusion that skinny people are perfect, happy, and smug with their approach to life because they are skinny. That they get everything they want. That life always works out for them.

I see alot of skinny people who look upon fat people as loathsome, ugly, slow, dirty, unworthy of their attention, and obviously not happy.

Neither of these assumptions is correct.

I think it all comes down to attitude. I feel that this goes on more with women that men, because most men don't give a flying fig (ever seen one of THOSE? Pretty impressive.)

about what others think of them.

And skinny people do have image issues. Can you imagine the pressure to constantly (if it doesn't come naturally) to stay that way ?

And fat people feel helpless sometimes if they are really overweight because the loss process takes so long. It seems to be a vicious circle of "I can't do it, I'm not seeing results fast enough, I'll never look like __________, so why bother."

Anyone besides me ever feel this way ? Not sure if anyone was wondering about the "Bite Me" post - THAT was not reference to just skinny people, just people on their high horse about how wonderful they are. And don't you wish you could be like them.

Next time someone gives you a disapproving look, try this - lean towards them, squint a bit while looking at their face, and proclaim (not too quietly) that they have a booger in their nose.

If someone asks if you've gained/lost weight (and it smells of insincerity towards your well-being)wait three seconds, smile, look them in the eye and reply "Why do you want to know ?"

Both tactics have wonderful results. Try it sometime. Also, eating Whoppers and shaking your ass at salespeople in VS is very empowering also.

Ok, stepping down from said soapbox. I wish Vox was back. I really value her posts/insight. I think she needs to be a CL.

Amy

Avatar for coffee_bean123
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-17-2003
Fri, 04-09-2004 - 6:39pm

>Which one?


I am not going to name names.


Then I can't help you. If you have a gripe with a post, you should gripe

Coffee Coffee 2 

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-13-2003
Fri, 04-09-2004 - 6:46pm
I am OVER IT actually.

You asked me who/which post it was, and because I am OVER IT, I am not going to tell you.

Case closed.