Tuesday

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-07-2004
Tuesday
14
Tue, 04-13-2004 - 9:32am
OK first off...Jeff hasn't made a decision yet and to be honest I wasn't expecting it. It was a very emotional talk and I know he feels very strongly for me. There is a lot that I can't even explain in a way to anyone beyond Jeff and I who can understand. But I am not angry and I am not upset to the point like I was. He has to work through more than his unresolved emotions for the ex. He needs to work through actually needing me and the committment he is going to make with me. I really can't understand why I am reacting the way I am reacting. I just know that now I am not suppossed to leave. I can't explain it and I don't how.

On other notes...I have lost another 2 pounds. HMMM, wonder if stress is a good thing? :)

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-11-2003
In reply to: karrietex
Tue, 04-13-2004 - 10:12am
If he were truly the one for you, he would not dishonor you in this fashion. You are worthy of a man who will honor and cherish YOU, not keep you hanging because he "hasn't decided yet". Don't shortchange yourself. By focusing all your attention on a "maybe", you could be missing the one who is truly meant for you.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-07-2004
In reply to: karrietex
Tue, 04-13-2004 - 10:21am
I really appreciate that. And I have thought of that, but I also think, and this is the best way to explain it, that this is worth the effort to work through it. That really is all he is asking is that I work through it with him and I am willing to at this time.

As for waiting, I don't want to date anyone else and I am not looking. However, I am not sitting at home either. I have a full life and will continue to do so.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-2003
In reply to: karrietex
Tue, 04-13-2004 - 10:52am

Good for you! ITA, Get out and make him think that you are living your life and not waiting around for him.


Try this little experiment: Do not call him back when he calls. When he DOES get in touch with you, tell him that your sorry you didn't get back to him, but things have been busy for you right now! DO it! and see if he doesn't come chasing after you. If he does, well, you may have a switch hitter on your hands. The more you chase him, the farther he will run. When you run from him, he will chase you. Do you really want a relationship like this?!?

Deb 270/228/145ish  (updated 4/19/04. Next weigh-in: 6/1/04)

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-07-2004
In reply to: karrietex
Tue, 04-13-2004 - 11:00am
I wish but we don't work that way.

I can't stress it any more than I have, right now I don't feel that I am suppossed to leave. We really want to work through it. I can't explain it to where someone else who wasn't there can truly understand it and I am getting tired of trying. I have already been fussed at enough here.

Ya'll I can't explain it. It's not as bad as you think and it's not what you think.



iVillage Member
Registered: 09-12-2003
In reply to: karrietex
Tue, 04-13-2004 - 11:24am
How long have you and this guy been dating?
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-07-2004
In reply to: karrietex
Tue, 04-13-2004 - 11:27am
hold on let me breace myself..strapping on belt to keep me from flying away when it hits.

1.5 months.


I can't explain it well enough .

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-19-2003
In reply to: karrietex
Tue, 04-13-2004 - 11:30am

I don't know the whole story, but I had to take a moment to reply.



Come visit my page and say hi!

   

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-15-2004
In reply to: karrietex
Tue, 04-13-2004 - 11:41am

Although this is not my intent I know this post is going to make you mad. You keep telling us about this relationship and of course we all want to be supportive, but every time someone makes a comment or suggestion you brush them off and tell them they don't know what they're talking about. I have a feeling that a great deal of us on this board have been in at least 1 relationship similar to yours, I know I have. I have also noticed that a lot of the regular members of the board have stopped posting to your comments about him. Maybe because of how you've reacted to others' comments in the past? My point is that I don't think you should

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-07-2004
In reply to: karrietex
Tue, 04-13-2004 - 11:43am
THANK YOU!! You understand so much.

He feels just as much as I do. He has shared so much of his heart which is hard for him to do with me and I can't see walking out just because we have hit our first rough time. We are happy togther and we respond greatly to each other. We take care of each other. The emotion is so deep I can't explain it and I have had so many fussing about it that it is making it hard to stand up and defend myself much less defend him.

It's hard when you leave a relationship adn they come back crying and saying they still care. He has to finish that completely before he can have a strong and good foundation in ours. This man brings the best out of me as no other man has.

I thought about leaving and I told him that but it was like he aged 10 yrs in front of me. I don't ever want to see that look of devestation and pain on his face.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-07-2004
In reply to: karrietex
Tue, 04-13-2004 - 11:56am
I am not brushing anything anyone has said off. I have thought about every point that is being brought up. I have 3 of my best friends bringing up the same points and the same comments are being made to them as well. To be honest this is it. I'm not going to post anymore about it. You see today I discovered that unless you were in that room with us no one knows what happened and I can't explain it as well as I would like. I wasn't asking for advice or thoughts. I was sharing about it because I know a few wanted to know. I already know what I am going to do about this and I am fine with my decision, which for some reason not many have been able to understand.

Yes, you are right this did upset me but it's your view and I am not going to say anything about it. You are entitled to it.

Again...I have thought about every point and to those I thank you. I was not asking for anything today since I already know at this moment what I need to do, I was simply sharing. You won't hear anymore about it.

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