New around here, BUT...

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-20-2004
New around here, BUT...
73
Tue, 04-20-2004 - 6:52pm
I've lurked for a while. I'm really not so sure what all this "troll" business has been about. It seems to me that we all are entitled to our own free speech. I don't want to ruffle anyone's feathers, but I think it goes too far. I'd like to come here for support and advice from ALL types of people, and hopefully none of you will decide to label me a troll.

I think some of Forte's messages have been dismissed out of hand in spite of holding good advice or support, because some people have decided she is "troll"ish. I would like help from anywhere I can get it.

I don't mean to sound like anyone's mother. I just hope I get some positive responses, and some helpful ideas on how to lose a large amount of weight. Thanks!

Abby

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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-20-2004
Thu, 04-22-2004 - 12:29pm
Hi Forte,

At last, we meet!!

Nice meeting you too! It seems the best advice here comes from people like you whom these "regulars" take a notion to attack with such bravado. Hopefully Abby's post has cooled their jets, at least for a while, and there can be civil conversation around here. I find some of your suggestions especially helpful, and for that I'm in your gratitude.

The cookbooks! Thank you, thank you, thank you! I couldn't find your posts offhand, and I remembered you're discussing a couple, but the last time I went to the bookstore I couldn't for the life of me remember the titles. Cary Neff, I heard on of all places a Jenny Craig advertisement on tv that he's going to be offering recipes in conjunction with the Jenny Craig program. Apparently, it's not prepared food but recipes for people who belong to that program to make on their own if they want to. When you mentioned his book, I found a copy at our Borders Bookstore and yes it is expensive, but it's on my definite "I want" list. So thank you again, and keep up these useful suggestions!

It's good that some people like you haven't been run off. And it's very very good meeting you. This thread is the first I've posted in, and to comment to Abby on this subject of the board's harassment. I don't want to get into that nonsense, so that's the reason I haven't posted. But now I'm glad I have, to you two at least. Take care. Thanks again.

Kinja

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 04-22-2004 - 12:43pm

You know, Im not feeling very well

  Shawna-- Proud Cl for 100 Pounds or More to Go 

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-20-2004
Thu, 04-22-2004 - 12:46pm
Hi Abby,

I see she's answered the question I had about the cookbooks. I first saw her mention some in a thread about cereal, and then a couple more threads she mentioned others, but I couldn't for the life of me find those threads when I wanted to write the titles down because I was headed for the bookstore myself.

You ask if I'm dieting too. I'm losing weight and I'm eating differently but I'm not going to call it dieting because what I'm doing is following the **advice** of some other poster whom I read here once and who the regulars chased off a while back. That person had the brainy idea of figuring out how many calories you should be eating **if** you were at correct weight, and then eating **as if** you were there already. In other words, if a person of normal weight for your height and age should ideally be eating 1,800 calories (for instance), then don't wait until you were at that ideal weight to eat that many (am I making sense?). So that's what I've done: tried to eat fresh foods at the amounts appropriate for my build, age, height. And like you, I'm coming along just fine now. (I can't remember which "troll" according to some, first posted that idea but it's been a great one for me and if that person is still reading, I'd like to thank her or him for the great idea!)

Exercise, I like to walk too and we have an indoor track in my area for when the weather is bad, but I like to do it outside in the fresh air as much as possible. But I've taken another suggestion from someone others here labeled "troll" and I've found activities in my community that interest me. For instance, I started playing community volley ball on Saturdays (something I haven't done since I was a kid) but this weekend I notice is earth day and there's a community pick-up scheduled, where anyone who is interested meets at one of the parks and everybody works together to make it look nice. I figure that I can burn more than a few calories this Saturday, doing something useful and having a good time too, and maybe some interesting conversations with total strangers....and even get a free tee shirt (not the goal, but a nice touch that tee shirt!) so that's what I'll be doing Saturday. Today I haven't decided yet, but I don't do the same old thing every day and I just try to mix it up a bit.

BTW, to anybody else reading this. Since Saturday is earth day there should be activities in every one of your communities and others here might find some community cleanup activity that would be fun, good exercise, and even a chance to meet some new people while getting out in the fresh air. You might want to check your local newspapers and get out there and have fun!

Happy to meet you, Abby. Keep up the good work.

Kinja

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-20-2004
Thu, 04-22-2004 - 12:52pm
But Jess I've read for a while here and the people who were attacked by regulars, just for coming on the board, had nothing to do with the board's problems. For instance, Forte did nothing to anyone here and I saw that the very first post she made she got jumped. I hope this is over because some regulars have chased away some of the most helpful new posters who have appeared, and it's been going on for a long, long time now. Lets just don"t do it anymore
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-09-2003
Thu, 04-22-2004 - 1:14pm
YAH!!! WHAT SHAWNA SAID!!!
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-20-2004
Thu, 04-22-2004 - 1:38pm
Shawna, please stop. At first this morning it looked like posting here *could* finally be a possibility...that *perhaps* the regulars who needlessly attack every other new person who comes to this board had finally *stopped.* Forte is not your problem. I am not your problem. No one else who has come to this board is your problem. And the only *troll-ish* behavior I've ever seen on this board has come from a handful of *regulars* who have set themselves up as gatekeepers here, and chased others away. So please, please try to see what Abby was talking about, and what I'm seeing, and what others have seen too I suspect. Just stop it.

I've noticed that *MOST* of the time, when you guys want to chase someone off *your* board, it begins with "why are you here" (as you've just started with me). Let me tell you why I'm here then, and be done with it. I came across this board, about a year ago, when I happened upon some really good advice, from a professor I think, about some foods to try. You guys chased her away. And from time to time I've found other good advice, from other people you guys are labeling "trolls." So the best advice I'm getting is from people you don't like very much. But, and here I'll have to echo Abby....I'll take the advice where I can get it. And thanks to that first person, I've enjoyed some new products she recommended. Thanks to someone else you labeled "troll" I've discovered that I don't have to "diet" but can eat the number of calories I should be eating and lose weight doing what I should be doing the rest of my life anyway. And thanks to other people you've labeled "troll" I've learned other things which help me.

So why am I here? Well, I probably won't **post** here, because I don't want to be the target of your habitual labeling of somebody **troll** and I sure don't want, for myself, to be chased around your board and called names like that. BUT I AM HERE AS A READER, at least, because I learn the most from some of the people you are nastiest to. And I'd like to learn, because I'd like to lose weight and live a healthier lifestyle. You see, at age 29 (that would be TWENTY NINE) I was rushed to the hospital with a heart attack. And that's another reason I won't stay in your target range, and be your next **troll.** You see, I'm in no mood either. And I won't risk being targeted and having my blood pressure rise.

This morning, while reading, I saw an open invitation...as I took it...from Abby and Forte and somebody else....to write. And so I did. Like you, and like everybody here, it would be nice to converse with someone and really I wanted to talk to Abby and Forte, instead of just reading. But if you want to talk about "BEING IN NO MOOD"....well, for health reasons.....I'm in no mood to put up with the attacks that regulars like you make against new posters here....and I'm most certainly in no mood to be your next little target.

Please stop yourself, voxpopulli. I'm not attacking you. I'm responding to a rather nasty post you wrote to me. But I'm not going to get caught up in your nasty little world here either. As Abby said, what regulars are doing here has nothing to do with support. I need to lose weight. I need to be healthy. And I don't need to get upset and have a heart attack over some stupid behavior by those people here who run around being nasty to new posters. I wonder if you can even step back and TRY to see yourself as others see you when you do this sort of thing? Just can you stop it?

Nice meeting you Abby and Forte, but posting here is not good for the soul (not mine at least) and back to lurkdom I go before **troll** the regulars decide to label me!

Kinja

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-20-2004
Thu, 04-22-2004 - 1:43pm
Is that really necessary? As I said, can you step back and stop yourselves from being nasty to new posters? It's not very supportive, and I don't think those individuals behaving this way REALLY see themselves as the lurkers see them. As I also said, back to lurkdom I go because I'm not your next target here. I have neither the health nor the inclination for being attacked. You know, the board could be **support** if the regulars who act this way could learn to control themselves (what Abby said...bears a re-reading by some here). Good day.

Kinja

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 04-22-2004 - 1:50pm

Man your game is so old...get a new one already?

  Shawna-- Proud Cl for 100 Pounds or More to Go 

Avatar for brens2boys
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-29-2003
Thu, 04-22-2004 - 1:58pm
~yawns~ Same ol,same ol.First off...no one EVER chased off our beloved(note the sarcasm)*professor*~chuckle~,She took it upon herself to come up with some strange story how everyone all of a sudden was against her(even though I saw no such post as that was when I started coming here).Everyone praised her for her weightloss,yet instead of encouragement from her then,she became very bitter in her posts and never had anything positive to say after that.That is why she left.

You come here for advise,post a simple HELLO,MY NAME IS____________.I'M LOOKING FOR SOME SUPPORT!A little background and some nice chit chat and you will get TONS of positive posts back at you.You come here and belittle anyone or the board in general on your first post and yeah....we tend to hesitate about being so chummy.Way to many trolls linger on this board....I guess because they feel it's some sort of joke to make fun of the very overweight people.I think most regulars here are SOOOOO freakin tired of hearing nothing but negativity from newbie posters,that yeah...it's somewhat hard to even want to get to know some people.

Play nice or don't play at all!It's not that difficult to do really.Hi,my name is Bren and I'd like to make some friends who have the same weight issues I have.Maybe I can get some advise from you lovely people....yada,yada,yada.How hard is that?

Bren

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 04-22-2004 - 2:11pm

Omg, Bren, you have me chuckling my big butt off!

  Shawna-- Proud Cl for 100 Pounds or More to Go 

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