Doing one thing different

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-26-2003
Doing one thing different
98
Sun, 04-25-2004 - 1:25pm
I am so frustrated with myself lately. I just don't know what the hell is wrong with me. I'm one of those people who has everything under control. I've been successful at everything I've ever tried-except managing my weight. I know it's not because I'm dumb or don't have willpower or don't understand nutrition. There's more to it than that. That's part of why I get so mad at thin people who make stupid remarks to overweight people like "why don't you try counting calories." Ugh.

Anyway, I've been counting calories and it is NOT working. I do well and get obsessive, then I get bingey and in the end (as with every diet) I end up gaining weight. So, I know I need to take a more behavioral strategy. So, I am hereby vowing to do only one thing different. From now on I am vowing to only eat when I am truly rumbly-tummy hungry. I know that making this one change will make a big difference to me. Even when I count calories or do ww or atkins I find myself eating when I'm not hungry because I have the calories or points or whatever. This behavior needs to end. So, I'm coming out here and stating that this is my new goal. Y'all can feel free to ask me how it's going because I probably need it.

Anyone else have one thing they really need to focus on?

Erin

http://www.GlitterMaker.com/ - Glitter Graphics
Mom

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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-14-2004
Mon, 04-26-2004 - 12:46pm
forte, you are only thinking in terms of pragmatics and that is why it isnt a stupid remark to you. experential reality and logical reality are wholly seperate and your inability to allow for the experience makes your suggestion null and void.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Mon, 04-26-2004 - 12:48pm
She KNOWS that! Her point was about cravings, which are something that the vast majority of dieters struggle with. Sure, we all know about calories, and about meal planning, and about food journalling, etc. , etc. The problem is when those intense feelings of desire for a particular food hit, or the desire to eat far more of something than we know we should. That is the time when the instincts of the body are battling against the conscious knowledge of the mind, and that is tough. As I say, the vast majority of all dieters (I think, most people!) struggle with this - if you are one of the lucky few who does not, then you should feel very, very blessed, but perhaps do a little bit of research so that you can have a little understanding for the rest of us. Many books, websites, or TV shows dedicated to weight loss can give you more information/confirmation on that if you are interested. I'd be happy to recommend some if you like :-)
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2004
Mon, 04-26-2004 - 12:49pm
I disagree, it doesn't have to be that way at all.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Mon, 04-26-2004 - 12:53pm
You are entitled to disagree, of course, but the facts and the research in this case clearly seem to agree with what I said. As I stated, I'd be happy to point you in the right direction, if you are interested in learning more. After all, "opinion" is only valid if it is grounded in education and knowledge!
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-01-2003
Mon, 04-26-2004 - 3:15pm
I think one of the greatest things I have learned from this board is that different things work for each person. While, scientifically, it may all boil down to caloric input and output, each of us has a different method of reaching those input and output goals. Journaling keeps some people on track, while other methods work best for other people. I think it is important to find a method that works for you, and in the process we often end of trying several methods to find the right one. Losing weight, as the rest of life, is largely a trial and error process.

Here's to everyone finding the path that's best for them! :)

-Tina

266/243/160?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-14-2004
Mon, 04-26-2004 - 6:10pm
That is something I can relate to. I still find myself looking in the pantry or refrigerator for something to snack on, but then I realize I'm not hungry. I don't know if it is a boredom kind of thing, or what. I've been doing pretty good at catching myself before I grab something when I'm not hungry, but it is a habit that I still haven't broken yet.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-26-2003
Mon, 04-26-2004 - 10:09pm
Forte,

I stand by my original remark. Suggesting calorie counting in an offhand way to a fat person is a stupid comment. Yes, simply counting calories does produce weight loss. I agree that the success of any diet depends on burning more calories than one consumes. But the remark is stupid in the same way that it is stupid to say to a smoker trying to quit to "just go cold turkey" or to a chronic alcoholic to simply give up the drink. The content of the remark is not inherently stupid, but one who makes such suggestions displays significant naivety.

Humans are not robots. I know the exact behaviors that I could perform that would produce weight loss. We all know these behaviors. However, there is an emotional and biochemical side to this as well. My area of expertise is in the biological and genetic mechanisms involved in the etiology of addictive behaviors. Though eating is not typically considered an addictive behavior, I can assure you that eating activates many of the same pleasure pathways in the brain as many drugs. I firmly believe that the overweight dieter faces a difficult biochemical battle similar to that of a drug addict, the body produces powerful signals that make it difficult to lose weight. I'm not saying this to deny responsibility for my actions, but to point out that losing weight is hard. Let's be honest, if losing weight were really as simply as detachedly tallying calories obesity would not be an epidemic.

I also believe that eating should be a source of pleasure. Over-planning my meals takes away some of the joy of eating and I'm not really willing to give that up. No, I'm not saying that I would rather be fat and happy than slim and deprived. I'm also not saying that I plan to live off of doritos and ice cream. Some of my favorite foods are veggies and fruits (I'm not much of a meat eater). What I am saying ist that I want to learn to eat more "normally." The vast majority of naturally slim people don't journal or plan their meals days in advance (except perhaps to help with grocery shopping).

That being said, I do appreciate the your suggestions. Journaling is something that I have tried repeatedly, but find does not work for me. The time has come to try a new approach to losing weight. I could journal calories, fat grams, carbohydrates or points and they would all produce weight loss. My issue is really figuring out how to create a plan that I can live with for life.

These are difficult issues. I really appreciate every single poster's support and suggestions!

Erin

http://www.GlitterMaker.com/ - Glitter Graphics
Mom
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-04-2003
Mon, 04-26-2004 - 10:26pm
Erin I think that's a great idea.
 
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2004
Tue, 04-27-2004 - 3:26pm
Well, I'm going to respectfully disagree with you. I think when a person suggests calorie counting to an overweight individual, they are really being given the key to success. I can speak from personal experience, as I'm sure you've read that I've lost over 150 lbs now. And I can tell you that planning my own meals, writing them down with calories and fat grams, into a journal and then considering that page as a kind of *food bank account* has been the key to my own success vis losing the weight. I eat three well balanced meals, I count the calories, and then when I'm done I'm really done for the day. That coupled with sensible exercise is really an important key.

Have you ever watched "Cooking Thin" on the food channel? I caught yesterday's program, and Chef Kathleen was showing a 14 year old boy who weighed over 300 lbs some strategies for successful weight loss. She asked him what he typically ate. It didn't **sound** like much, and she put the items out on the table and it didn't *look like** much either. A bagel and cream cheese (I think) for breakfast, a peanut butter sandwich and fruit for lunch, a couple rice bowls (the kind you zap in the microwave) for after school snacks or while tv watching, and a dinner that consisted of some meat an potato and a little veggie. You get the picture......but the calories, when calculated, came to WAY WAY over 3,000 (I think it was closer to 4,000) and therein lies the problem. Then she showed him how much healthy food (fresh fruits, veggies......you know the drill) could make up a healthy meal, a healthy day, and all for around 1,500 calories. In fact, it was a WHOLE HECK OF A LOT more food that he was eating on the *grab and run* and then feel hungry later approach which he had been using.

When a person, thin or not, suggests to an overweight individual that the key is counting calories and getting a little normal exercise in....that person is really trying to help. Maybe they should say nothing? Maybe they should look the other way? But some choose to TRY to be helpful, and I'll stand by what I said earlier.....counting calories, eating sensibly, and getting a little exercise (at least) and then doing it every day, eating properly every day.....really will get you to the finish line HEALTHY.

As for your comments relating obesity to smoking, alcoholism, etc.....I'm sorry, I don't buy the addiction route. Fat is not a disease, though obesity can lead to disease. Obesity is the result of poor eating habits, not a disease....catching or otherwise. It's an easy excuse which some people use for being overweight, that or "it's in the genes" but nothing like that has ever been proven scientifically. And frankly, every single living person who is overweight can change for himself/herself, if he/she really wants to. And the way to do that is by taking better care to make GOOD life choices, which start by eating properly, learning as much as possible about good life choices, and then following through.

And no one said it couldn't be a source of pleasure. Eating surely is. I'm an example of that. Have you read my posts about gourmet cookbooks? It takes time, and conscious decision making to live better by doing better. It's not about drudgery, but about enjoying life more fully by making better choices....choices which start in the kitchen, paying attention to calories and food choices. Planning meals certainly DOES NOT take away from pleasure. I'm sorry, but a planned lovely meal which is a feast for the eye and tastebuds, and all at a healthy range....well, is a whole lot more pleasure than an unplanned big mac in a rush. It just takes conscious choices, and deciding to take very very good care of yourself every single day.....and well, to love life and show it by taking good care of yourself. I certainly do, nowadays at least.


You take care, and good luck to you Erin.

Forte

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2004
Tue, 04-27-2004 - 3:28pm
Thanks, but I think I'm "pointed in the right direction" very nicely.

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