Observations of a lurker..

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-04-2004
Observations of a lurker..
13
Fri, 06-04-2004 - 4:50pm
First let me say that this post is not being made in the spirit of meanness. I read the post below by the young lady who decided not to join this board and realized that I really needed to come out of lurkdom and share my feelings. I hope that those of you who read this will see it as an honest observation from someone not caught in the crossfire of the troll war.

I found this board quite a while ago. Being shy by nature, I decided to merely lurk and hopefully gain some positive ideas through reading your posts. I hadn’t been lurking long at all before I could tell who the troublemakers were. The harsh criticism, sarcastic humor, and insulting nature of their posts gave them away. I also noticed that these troublemakers shared the same writing styles, opinions, and never fail to attack the same person over and over again. I checked the archives to find that this person (or persons, I guess I should say) had a pattern. I knew then that this person or persons had nothing of value to add and I used the feature that allows me to side step their posts all together.

Unfortunately, that didn’t completely solve the problem. I still find myself spending a good deal of time reading other people’s responses to the troublemakers. I know that those few who are being disruptive are infuriating. They are genuinely hateful most of the time. I believe that the responses you’ve made to these people were from your heart and made in an attempt to 'take the wind out of their sails', so to speak. I understand where your desire to respond to them is coming from, but it seems that it has and will continue to only make matters worse. These troublemakers aren’t new from what I can tell. They’ve not been changed or discouraged by your responses to them. Time after time they simply seem to laugh at your frustration and anger towards them. Each time they cause an uproar, they’ve gotten exactly what they’re looking for: Your attention.

As someone who has watched this from the outside, it is disheartening to see how much control those few hateful posters have over the tone and direction of this board. In reality, they shouldn’t warrant one second of your time and effort. They’re so far beneath most of you on the decent human being scale; they shouldn’t be considered any more intrusive than a gnat. Basically, you’ve all tried just about everything to get rid of those causing trouble, except ignoring them completely. If they have no one to argue with, if no one reads and responds to their posts, they’re fun is over. They may stick around because they have no life and no where else to be, but they will have absolutely no power over any of you anymore. Don’t worry that the board will suffer if you stop defending it from the trolls. This board and all of you will only grow stronger.

Take the power here out of the hands of the trolls once and for all, please.

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Avatar for angelinoh
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-19-2003
Fri, 06-04-2004 - 9:42pm
welcome out of lurkdom =) i agree with a lot that you said

hope you post some more we need more postive people on here
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 06-04-2004 - 10:21pm
And its a good and positive opinion Amanda =)

Shawna Guinea Pig 4

  Shawna-- Proud Cl for 100 Pounds or More to Go 

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2000
Fri, 06-04-2004 - 10:50pm
I haven't read any responses yet but have to agree with you totally. I too lurk way more than I post and read all the bad stuff. I really wish everyone would just not reply to the bad and negitive posts that happen here. Maybe then they will just go away. :-)Stephanie

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