Looking for Support and Stories

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-20-2004
Looking for Support and Stories
13
Mon, 06-21-2004 - 7:02pm
Hi. My name is Tana and I'm a 33 year old nurse. I've been overweight for many years, although when I look back now at photos, I looked just fine as a 14 or 16. I don't understand how I could have thought of myself as fat then.

I need to lose (as the category indicates) about 125 pounds. Much of my trouble comes from overeating (bingeing) and total apathy regarding exercise.

Currently at 5'5" I weigh about 285#. Frankly I'm not sure exactly where I am because I'm afraid to get on the scale. The other thing I want to do as I'm starting to try and be healthier is measure myself. I know I need to because numbers (moving in the right direction) really motivate me.

I hope that there are others here who are also starting this difficult journey. I'm tired of feeling alone, down and depleated.

I've always thought that if I could only spend 24 hours in a "skinny" body I'd never have weight managment problems again. I can't even remember how it feels to be light or pretty and not feel like I'm hefting another person along with me. My husband and I are having fertility problems, and although I've had 2 rounds of clomid this year, I'm almost afraid to become pregnant because I know I'm so unhealthy.

So here I am. This is as honest as I've been able to be in years. Maybe someone else feels the same way - or at least can identify closely enough to want to respond.

I look forward to hearing about successes and difficulties and hopefully can be here to support someone else as well.

I'd appreciate knowing how this site and discussion group has helped you. I'm sort of unsure how to proceed from here....

Tana

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iVillage Member
Registered: 05-23-2004
Tue, 06-22-2004 - 8:59pm
Oh, psyching myself up to walk twice a day is easy NOW, lol. At first I had to force myself to get out there and walk. I would cuss and fuss the whole way, but whenever I thought of giving up I heard my mom saying, "Vikki, you know you want to live long enough to see your kids grow up. If you don't do something once and for all that might not happen!" After doing it for a while now, it has just become a daily habit. Sometimes I have to change my times by an hour or two, but I don't dare stop. I'm afraid if I do, I won't start again.

Smoothie_gal is the nickname my husband gave me. He started out saying, "Oh, aren't you a real smoothie!", whenever I would play a joke on him or aggrivate him--which is often BTW.

Eventually, he just started calling me his Smoothie Gal. Silly, yes, but it was all I could think of when I signed up for Ivillage and was asked for a user name.

Vikki :)

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-26-2003
Tue, 06-22-2004 - 9:29pm
Hi Tana,

I also really related to what you said. I'm a binger and am really unhappy with my current weight. I remember being mortified by how incredibly obese I was in high school-I never dated because I was convinced I was "the fat girl," I cried when I saw my senior pictures because I thought I looked soooo fat. I must have weighed 160 pounds. I would be running around like I was Miss America if I weighed that today. :)

I'm glad to hear from you and hope to see more of you on the board!

Erin

http://www.GlitterMaker.com/ - Glitter Graphics
Mom
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-16-2004
Wed, 06-23-2004 - 10:24am
Hello Tana and welcome to the boards!

 

  Shawna

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