Prejudice, Ignorance or What?

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-25-2003
Prejudice, Ignorance or What?
10
Tue, 06-29-2004 - 11:14am
I am so upset that I could not eat dinner last night, and was still awake at 2:30. I think I’m an official anorexic now!

I went to the drug store to pick up my prescriptions, and then thought I’d get a box of granola bars and some cookies. We didn’t do a grocery shop this weekend because we were busy installing a new shower, so I didn’t have any goodies for my son’s lunch. Look at that – I’m even trying to justify buying that stuff now! I was in line at the counter to pay for them when an elderly man behind me said “you shouldn’t be eating that”. I said “excuse me?” and again, he said, “you shouldn’t buy that”. I said it’s not for me, it’s for my son and then I guess he realized that he said something stupid and started to ramble on about how he liked chocolate but doesn’t eat it anymore.

I was so angry and so embarrassed – NO ONE has EVER made a comment like that to me before! I have heard of that happening to other people, but could not really believe people could be so mean. I got on the scale this morning, and I’m not actually heavier than I thought, but that rude, hateful comment has upset me like I’ve never been upset. Idiot, as if I didn’t know I was fat! Even the cashier looked at him, and then tried to make light of it. I started thinking of snappy comebacks I could say, after the fact of course! Oh, I am so humiliated, I just HATE people! I told DS about it who wanted to beat him up. I told DH and he couldn’t believe it either. Last June, I had my wallet stolen at work. This June it was my car. When I was a kid, I had my share of bullies, too. I feel that I am an easy target. There must be a sign on me that says “kick me”.

Thanks ladies, I needed to unload so that I don’t turn this around and blame myself.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-16-2004
Tue, 06-29-2004 - 11:39am

Yeow!

 

  Shawna

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-01-2003
Tue, 06-29-2004 - 12:54pm

What a jerk!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2004
Tue, 06-29-2004 - 1:14pm
Sometimes people speak first and think second. It sounds like the elderly gentleman had an unfortunate momentary case of "hoof in mouth" and we're all human, after all. I wouldn't be too hard on him. And I definitely wouldn't worry about what some stranger said in line at the grocery store. Life is too short for that. Get outside and enjoy a beautiful day...and forget about it!

Forte

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-16-2003
Tue, 06-29-2004 - 1:55pm
Man, I hate those comments...I feel for ya I really do...

But I have come to realize that HEY, I am a big girl, and if some one else says it, it won't hurt me anymore b/c I already know..I did have a 14 year old tell me, in front of everyone, last year how i was the only girl in the room, but there was enough of me to go round and round and round.. I almost cried, but I didn't, and now I just don't talk to him anymore. I just quit caring what people think of me. I know I am fat, and I am not ashamed of it anymore...and people probably do see you as an easy target b/c maybe you come off insecure b/c of your weight...I used to be like that, but now people know that I will fight over anything, so they don't mess with that anymore

Sara

~Sayruhb02
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-11-2004
Tue, 06-29-2004 - 1:59pm
Deb I thought I was the only one who hated people. People just need to mind ther own business. Sorry about his insensitivity. People like him are why i will never attend a high school reunion.

We've got to get one of thoes bumper stickers Mindy suggested. I just love it!

Hugs, Brenda

Hugs, Brenda 

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2003
Tue, 06-29-2004 - 2:52pm
I know exactly how you feel. My mom had a very similar situation at the grocery store too. She was in line and an old man said something even more rude. He said "Well, once you eat that for lunch then what are you going to eat?" My poor mom was so flabbergasted she said "Guess I will eat my bird seed!" I wanted to hunt that old geezer down and rip off his balls! People are just so ignorant!

Heather


18

Heather and Shawn 7/16/04

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-16-2004
Tue, 06-29-2004 - 3:10pm
Now THAT was rude!

 

  Shawna

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-23-2004
Tue, 06-29-2004 - 3:47pm
I understand how hurt and angry a situation like that can make you feel. Imagine if that old geezer was your father-in-law. That's right, my father in law was the one who said to me "You need to lose weight".

I was standing by his hospital bed holding his brand new grandbaby, my dd, and he said that to me. We'd just drove over 500 miles to see him because we'd been told he was seriously ill (he wasn't by the way) and we wanted him to meet his grandaughter who we'd named after his late wife, before he passed away.

Turns out that my father-in-law had a bowel obstruction that needed surgery to fix. I told the doctor I thought he was still full of @#$%! We stayed for five days and at least twice more the ONLY thing he said to me was "You need to lose weight". It's a wonder I didn't smother the old coot!

Vikki

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-25-2003
Tue, 06-29-2004 - 4:50pm
Gee, nice to know that most of you didn't think I was overreacting. I don't know what compels people to lash out at others' weaknesses, but I do know that if I get another comment like that again, I will be prepared with something equally obnoxious. I hate to admit it, but the older I get, the more disillusioned I become with society. True friends and family become more precious as time goes on. Thanks again!

Debbie

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-31-2003
Tue, 06-29-2004 - 9:26pm

Poor guy probably had no clue.