I am new...and I need advice

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-11-2004
I am new...and I need advice
9
Wed, 08-11-2004 - 1:41pm
I am a 35 year old mother of 2 who recently separated from my husband. Before I had children I weighed 120 pounds. I just got on the scale this morning and it read 291 lbs and I am only 5'4". I am having trouble keeping up with my two children. I am a very outgoing person and now I find myself just staying home. I am also having trouble find clothing that fits me properly in that i limit myself to sweatpants. I don't know where to begin. Does anyone know how I can start?? Thanks for your help.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-11-2004
Wed, 08-11-2004 - 1:58pm
Hey Cutie! I am a lot like you. Except I need to divorce my husband and am not strong enough. I am 36. Mother of 2 boys. I am 5'5". My stats are 290+/270/135. Clothes are a tough one. I use the internet a lot for shopping. Lane Bryant, Just my Size, Jessica London, etc. I started last fall by just taking away some of the extra calories I had been consuming as a way to cover up my depression. Now I am working at using a smaller plate. I can't seem to get motivated with exercise, but I am doing more now than before. One of the big things I took out of my diet was pepsi. I rarely drink any kind of soda anymore. A few years ago I saw a dietician and did really well at losing, but I can't afford her right now. Some of the people on here do Atkins and Weight Watchers and have had sucess. I wish you the best. Stick around there are a lot of wonderful people here that hand out a lot of support. Hugs, Brenda

Hugs, Brenda 

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-11-2004
Wed, 08-11-2004 - 2:08pm
Thank you, Brenda, for your support. I know I need to start some sort of diet/exercise program soon before my weight keeps going up. I just can't believe the scale this morning!! I want to be able to date again but not until I can feel comfortable with my body. Summer is so tough for me....I have a hard time handling this heat. Can't wait for fall!!
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-11-2004
Wed, 08-11-2004 - 3:25pm
I understand it all to well. I can remember getting on the scale and just crying. Still do, on bad days. Good luck with that dating thing. Hugs, Brenda

Hugs, Brenda 

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-16-2004
Wed, 08-11-2004 - 3:27pm
Hello there and welcome to the boards :)

 

  Shawna

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-04-2004
Thu, 08-12-2004 - 9:24am
Hi and welcome! I like your screen name :) I was in denial about my weight for a long time. I knew I had a weight problem, but I don't think I realized the extent of it until I took a good look at myself. Shawna and Brenda both gave you some good advice. Do the research to see what method will work best for you, and in the meantime, take a look at what you're doing now and what can you improve? Make one or two small changes and see how that goes. Once you feel you've gotten that down, make a few more changes. A small change could be to add some vegetables to your diet. Or take a 10 minute walk. Whatever works for you. Eventually, those small changes add up and you'll start to see results. Good luck :)

~~Linda

~~Linda

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-25-2003
Thu, 08-12-2004 - 11:55am
I have to agree with Linda here. Take small steps- they really do add up. I started dieting at 8, really hardcore by 12, with a gain of 200 pounds to show for it by the time I was 28. All of these diets were extremely restrictive, some of them were dangerous (diet pills, illegal drugs, laxatives, diuretics, compulsive exercise). I got up to 360 pounds, and I felt completely hopeless and overwhelmed at the thought of having so much weight to lose. I would start a diet, fall off the wagon, and then start an even more restrictive diet because now I had more weight to lose. The more restrictive the diet became, the harder it was for me to stay on it, and the worse I felt when I failed.

I went into a 12 step support group for compulsive overeating in March 2002. (As a disclaimer, I am a binge eater- my issue was not that I had an extra helping every now and then. With sugar and certain other things, once I start I am completely powerless to stop. What started as an occasional binge to comfort myself eventually turned into binging every second I was awake.) My sponsor suggested that I start with eliminating sugar and not eating in between meals. I thought that there was absolutely no way that I could lose weight- it didn't seem restrictive enough for me, and I kept questioning it. The thing is that I could deal with it over a longer period of time because it wasn't restrictive, and over the past 2 1/2 years, my food plan has changed several times- now I am basically doing sugar busters (no sugar or sugar free candy, no white flour, white rice, or white bread). This is something that I plan on doing for the rest of my life- it's a healthy food plan with whole grains and lots of veggies, and it works for me. I gradually added the exercise in, but only after giving myself time to adjust to the new food plan. (I quit smoking around that time too :-))I now do 6-8 hours a week at the gym, supplemented by yoga and other things at home. When I first started, I never thought I could possibly lose all of the weight I needed to lose, but now I am convinced that I would have never made it if I had been more restrictive. The only reason I was able to stay the course was because I made the gradual changes and I didn't feel deprived or overwhelmed by taking on more than I could handle at a time.

What has also been a tremendous help to me is the suport I get from my group and from these boards. Those people can relate to how hopeless and overwhelmed I felt where people who only need to lose a small amount of weight don't get it. I felt so alone before I got support from others- it's so nice to know that I'm not the only one who was feeling that way. You can do this, and we will be here for you every step of the way. We have been where you are right now, and we understand.

Hugs,

Lane

360/189/???

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2004
Thu, 08-12-2004 - 4:21pm
Hi,

You say, >>anyone know how I can start??<< Sure, that's easy enough really. Just start with your next meal. How can you make it better? And the next, and the next, etc. And before sundown, start with your next exercise. What can you do today, tomorrow, the next day, to get just a little more exercise? Start with small changes. Keep them up. And you'll realize big rewards. But the important thing, start somewhere (you pick) and then continue. You'll get there. Good Luck! And nice to meet you! I'm Forte

Avatar for angelinoh
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-19-2003
Thu, 08-12-2004 - 6:38pm
welcome to the board. I'm sure others had some good advice for ya. I started by taking my weight+measurements,keeping track of eating/drinking habits and seeing what needed to change and then worked on eating less/better and exercising.
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-11-2004
Thu, 08-12-2004 - 8:51pm
Thank you everyone for your kind thoughts, great advice and most of all support. I just can't believe that only 8 years ago I was wearing bikinis....I guess I have been in denial all these years. I can't imagine my stomach in a bikini right now. Anyway, I did do some exercise today...walked for 10 minutes. But, its amazing that even that is hard. It just amazes me that I have gotten to this point. But, I guess I need to look forward and change the way I live so that I can be a better mother to my children. Thanks again!!