spilling the beans

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-13-2004
spilling the beans
8
Wed, 05-18-2005 - 4:53pm

So, I have recently had a strange experience (opportunity??) in this whole weight loss trial of mine. I had done very well losing weight before Christmas 04 and since then have packed it all back on. I joined WW and failed. A couple of weeks ago I was panicing about the sugar monster and randomly saw an advertisement in my city for people who want to lose weight for a documentary. I went to the audition, and it was very very difficult.

I had to fill out a questionaire about my weight loss history (overweight from age 10 onwards), the diets I have tried, my feelings about this process, my goals, the most humiliating aspects of being overweight, etc etc. They took my photographs and measurements. Then I had an interview with the producers of this documentary. It is produced by the same company that presented "Taking it Off" but this program will not be a contest or anything, just one person losing weight for 6 months with the help of trainer, nutritionist, every two weeks etc.

I cried through the whole first interview, and they invited me to a second callback. For the second one I had to bring my boyfriend with me, and they filmed the interview. they asked very personal questions, such as, am I embarrassed of my body when I am intimate with my boyfriend? and they asked him if he feels comfortable with my body. Among other questions, and I ended up crying through interview number two also. It is was just really a lot of things I never talked about before, and although I normally never cry, I couldn't help it.

By the end of this month, they will make another cut, and after a sample filming session they will pick the candidates. Then from July to Dec they will film every two weeks as I work, go to the gym, hang out with friends, etc.

I am so torn on this as I am kind of nervous about the TV part of it. I just don't want to be so emotional for six months on film! My biggest fear is that I will be selected and I cannot pass up this opportunity, then I will really be afraid to fail. Although realistically I know that if someone is filming your butt while you exercise you are just going to succeed.

This is a VERY VERY uncharacteristic move for me. advice, advice?? I have only told my boyfriend and my mother. She is worried it might be too much pressure.

(I also need to keep in mind, if I am not chosen, what will that mean for me? will I still be as committed on my own?)

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-19-2005
Wed, 05-18-2005 - 5:07pm

It sounds interesting in the fact that you would get a personal trainer and nutrionist.

However, I personally wouldn't be able to do it. I would be too embarrassed to go on TV to do and say the most personal and intimate things about myself and my life. For example, my husband doesn't even know how much I weigh, let alone the world. LOL! Sure, I do it on here (talk intimate and very direct about my weight) but no one knows what I look like or who I am really. I don't have to look at you all face to face. Know what I mean?

But, it may be a great motivational factor for you and those that may watch it. I would really give it thought if I were you.

It all comes down to are YOU comfortable with everyone seeing and knowing these things about you? If you are then go for it. If not, well then maybe you should pass.




Edited 5/18/2005 5:09 pm ET ET by disruptivespirit
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-17-2004
Wed, 05-18-2005 - 5:17pm

Kristy: hmmmmmm weird but kinda cool. My first question I would ask is why you would do it? Are they giving you anything (ie: personal trainer for free, nutritionist for free, etc). Do you think that maybe doing this will help you be more accountable and help you lose weight more than on your own? Do you want to help women, just like you, in their weightloss journey? I don't know....

If it's something you want to do...I wish you the best of luck! And make sure you send me all the tapes!

Kerry

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-13-2004
Wed, 05-18-2005 - 9:39pm
mmn I know, it is weird. It is very weird for me to even think of doing it. I still have to consider it a lot more. The trainer and nutritionist and other experts are free. It is not a contest and not aired while you are losing weight but after. I am thinking a lot about the pros and cons and have to decide by the end of the month.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-01-2003
Thu, 05-19-2005 - 3:29am
Is there an option to quit in the middle? They may give you the option to quit after a month or something if you felt too pressured?? Asking won't hurt
Mary
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2000
Thu, 05-19-2005 - 9:27am
First of all I think it is a great opportuinity to help others like yourself. I am one. A lot of us feel like you. I am very embarrassed to show my body and I really don't know how DH feels. We have never discussed it. Those questions would have been very hard for me to answer.
Even if your not chosen, now all the cards are on the table. You and DBF know how each feels. I would think you would continue on program with no problem. Personally I really hope you get to do this. Good Luck, :-)Stephanie 280/255/223 for now
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-17-2004
Thu, 05-19-2005 - 11:15am

Well, I have mixed feelings on this.

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Fear

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-31-2004
Thu, 05-19-2005 - 11:21am
I think it sounds very interesting Kristrin!
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-13-2004
Thu, 05-19-2005 - 9:50pm

thanks for your comments guys.
About the humiliation...kerstin I agree. I would likely feel humiliated at times because of a camera focusing on the biggest problem in my life. I have thought about this alot and tried to make peace with it. I also think that I wear my weight every day anyway in public. Everyone gets to see it, and when I exercise, they can see how very big I am. When I swim there is really not much to hide anyway. And some days all on my own I feel pretty humiliated. As for the prying questions they have asked, they have lead me to so many new thoughts about how and why I am overweight you cannot even imagine. For this reason I am glad that I just got this far.

I think it is right that I ask a lot more questions than I already have. I will make a list and get some answers and reevaluate from there. From what I know it will be a documentary style focusing especially on the emotional issues tied to the weight, and dealing with these issues as well. If a pyschiatrist, or marraige counsellor, or carreer counsellor is required it will be provided, and also a makeover. I know that watching people lose weight makes me feel that it is possible, so hopefully regardless whether I am in this program I think it will help other people too.

I REALLY sincerely appreciate your feedback. I will let you know how it goes. Maybe I won't even make the next cut!

kristrin