So frustrated -- just keep gaining :(
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| Sun, 09-04-2005 - 6:58am |
Hi Everyone,
I've often lurked around this board. I just keep gaining weight. I go on one diet after another. I'm starting to think that the anti-diet approach makes the most sense. Some of the books I've looked into about breaking the food addiction or compulsive eating makes you cut out tons of food products like wheat, corn, caffeine, sugar, etc. I realize that is the optimal way to eat, but that, in effect, makes me want to eat more and "worse". Being told that I can't have something seems to drive me to eat. I've tried to trace it back into my psychological past, but all I can come up with is my mom telling me not to eat a Rice Krispie treat and I tried to sneak it anyway (and consequently got in trouble). I've had a lot of stuff happen in my life. My mom died when I was young and my father was abusive. I've basically supported myself through everything...and I've been a perfectionist at doing so. All this weight is on me in these pounds of hurt and abuse and neglect. I keep getting bigger. Will this nightmare ever end? It's time for me to do something, but what?
I know all about proper nutrition, yet can't put it into practice in my own life.
Has anyone tried anything that TRULY works? I have tried WW at least 6 or 7 times. I know it works, but it didn't help me change the way I viewed food. In fact, if anything, it made me more concerned and obsessive about counting points. I am unhealthy and want this weight off. I have considered a liquid diet, but really don't see how I could live on all liquids if I can't even follow a healthy food-based diet. I'm really at the end of my rope. I am "good" for a day or two and then binge and feel awful...both physically and emotionally. For example, I was "good" for the last few days and had no heartburn. Tonight I ate fried food and have horrible indigestion and heartburn. Why do I hurt myself? I know that's what will happen, yet I do it to myself.
I am in therapy and my therapist totally doesn't want me following a diet. She wants me to focus on emotional health right now. But I keep gaining weight and I need to lose some. It is adversely affecting my blood pressure.
Anyway, thanks for all your insight. And thanks for listening. Sometimes I guess that's what we need is someone to listen.
Shannon

Instead of focusing on a diet, how about just focusing on portion control, lean meats, more veggies and more exercise.