Wondering How Not To Hurt Myself....

Avatar for airlily
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-02-2004
Wondering How Not To Hurt Myself....
11
Tue, 09-20-2005 - 12:58am

Another sad post from me. I know.

I braved looking at my weight chart, and saw just how heavy I was when I began.

I shouldn't have looked. Ugh. I became so depressed. Oh well. I guess I should keep going, huh?

But, now I want to crash diet so badly....

298/286/155

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-19-2005
Tue, 09-20-2005 - 2:10am
Your stats say that you lost 12 pounds how incredible is that. I think you should think postive and continue on a healthy lifestyle plan. You know what a crash diet will do you will gain all the weight back and still be unhappy. The pounds didn't come on overnight and the won't come off that way to the fact that you looked at how much you weigh and can realize you need a change is a big step and crash dieting won't help. Good luck and make good choices for you and y our health
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-31-2004
Tue, 09-20-2005 - 8:23am
Instead of being upset about where you have been, be happy about where you are right now and where you are going :)
Avatar for airlily
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-02-2004
Tue, 09-20-2005 - 9:45am
Well, I didn't peek. It was said outloud to me by someone who didn't know I didn't know. They were trying to cheer me up about my weight loss and mentioned it to me. I didn't want to know because I used to be bulimic, and had been hospitalized. They teach you to stop vomiting, but not how to eat; thus, I'm super overweight now. I'd rather puke again, honestly!
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Tue, 09-20-2005 - 11:53am

PLEASE don't! You know that what you are doing NOW is healthy! You are eating well, and you are exercising and gaining muscle. Crash dieting or skipping back into purging will just put you back where you were before - not good for you physically or mentally. You have conquered one obstacle - now you are working on the weight. Keep going forward in your life, and don't step backwards! Besides, you are currently AT my GOAL weight, LOL - I set mini-goals for myself (I get to buy a CD or a book when I reach this one), and I'm currently working very hard to get to 286. I've had a few discouraging days, and I'm beginning to think I'll NEVER get there - and there you are already! ;-)

315/290.5/286

Avatar for airlily
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-02-2004
Wed, 09-21-2005 - 12:02am

I'll remember what you said. I just haven't weighed myself in years since being hospitalized, and it was a bit of a shock. I'm gonna try and keep it at 1200 cal/day and 40 min/day of workout so i stay healthy...

Thanks for the kind words. I guess weight is all about perspective. :)

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-03-2005
Wed, 09-21-2005 - 12:32am
KEEP IT UP!!! There is nothing any of us can really say to keep you motivated or get you to understand you are doing a good job. You will only really listen to YOURSELF. Thats all its about.. telling yourself and believe yourself!!! You will make it.. but if you let yourself lapse you might not make it for 5 more years.. if you don't lapse you might make it in less than 2 years. You choose.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-01-2003
Wed, 09-21-2005 - 4:36am

Just think of it this way: would you rather crash diet now and gain all the weight plus some a short time later? (you know that it will happen)
Or would you rather take it slow right now and build habits that would last a life time? I'd go for the second option. I'd rather take it slow than yo-yo diet for the rest of my life.

Mary
247/won't tell/165

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-20-2005
Wed, 09-21-2005 - 9:31am
Airlily- I was treated for bulimia 11 years ago, when I puked and pooped myself down from 230 lbs to 150 lbs. Think I looked good? NOPE. I was weak, dizzy, pale, and my hair was falling out. That is not the answer--ever. Falling back onto old negative behaviors is not the solution to weight issues- You're just punishing yourself- believe me- been there, done it! Girl, take a walk, go shopping and walk quickly thru a mall, do an exercise tape, ANYTHING, but throw up! You can do it- you owe it to yourself to take care of your body! Laura.
Avatar for airlily
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-02-2004
Thu, 09-22-2005 - 1:10am
Yeah, I know. It was just a thought that quickly entered my mind when I saw my weight (still in denial about it). I figured i would post it so you guys could talk me through it. I know, i wasn't very healthy then, either. How easy you forget those things when you're ddesperate to lose. :)
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-17-2003
Thu, 09-22-2005 - 10:07am

Honey, I am going through the EXACT thing right now. On Monday my husband and I took my son to an indoor playground to videotape him and send it to my in-laws. Well, when I saw the tape of myself my heart sunk. I was so ashamed and embarrassed of how fat and disgusting I thought I looked. I started screaming and crying at my husband for even filming me and I flat refused to send them that tape. He said I looked fine and that made me more mad, because I felt like that's telling me it's OK to stay 260 lbs, and it's not for me. I am not one of these women like on the show "Mo' Nique's Fat Chance" who love being big. I don't like it at all. 5 years ago I weighed 160 and I know that I have gained 100 lbs from having a baby and quitting smoking, but it is making me crazy! I was doing really well going to the gym and eating small portions but the last week or two I got WAY off track eating M&M's, ice cream and really AWESOME enchiladas! I hate going to the gym ONLY because the child care they have their sucks and if my son even makes a sign that he might cry they immediately call you to come get him. The longest I have ever gotten to work out was 30 minutes. They have 18 year olds watching the kids and they are always just sitting on their butts and God forbid they have to actually pay attention to a child! Anyway--sorry bout that rant! All you can do is take it one day at a time and just like another poster said, this weight didn't accumulate overnight and it will take lots of time and effort to get it off, but you will. It's VERY unhealthy to crash diet as you well know, and weight loss is recommended at 1-2 lbs a week. Even if you only lose a pound every 2 weeks, as long as you are trying, you are doing great. Exercise, eat small portions throughout the day, do whatever works for you to lose weight and wake up each morning ready to do your best, even when you want to take the scale and throw it into the wall. Be proud in knowing you are giving it your best and with time and spirit, you will succeed, even if it takes awhile. You can do it! **HUGS**

Angie

260/257/160

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