Newbie- desperately need some help-LONG

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2006
Newbie- desperately need some help-LONG
7
Thu, 01-05-2006 - 12:54am

Hi All... I'm a newbie here..
I've been lurking around for awhile now
(I have this board as my homepage in the hopes I might get some motivation)
Unfortunately it just isn't working and I'm at my wit's end.
I am 25 and although my weight is very unhealthy, I don't have any health problems and would like to keep it that way.
I try so hard to make lifestyle changes gradually and at the same time not obsess over every crumb that passes my way..
It just isn't working.
I know all the tips and tricks, and I really feel like a professional dieter..
The problem is I'M NOT LOSING ANY DARN WEIGHT..
I'll do good for a day or 2 and then I'll eat something and it's like magic..
my hand just shovels it into my mouth without me knowing.. it's like i'm hypnotized..
and once I get into a rhythym... WATCH OUT REFRIGERATOR!!!
I don't know what to do with myself..
I've tried pills, meal replacement shakes, low carb (which I actually did well on but just got tired of the restrictions)..
Now I'm on L.A. Weight Loss and I just can't make myself be good...
It's an excellent program (in my opinion).. I just can't force myself to follow it..
I have a gym membership (right next to L.A. weight loss for convenience) and I just don't go.. I don't know why.
I guess what I'm trying to say is I know how to do it.. I just can't seem to use all my knowledge to help myself.. =o(

*sigh*.. I don't know if I can be helped at this point.. but if anyone has any ideas.. I'm all ears!!!

Oh I forgot to mention.. about 70 pounds of the 130 I would like to lose was gained in the last 6 years.. I weigh 274.. (eek!!!) and would like to weigh 140ish. I would be happy to lose 70 and taper the last 60 off over a longer period of time.. (years even)
I just need to get past the dreaded 201 mark.

Thank you for reading all that mess... So sorry for rambling.. =o)




Edited 1/5/2006 1:01 am ET by misschiqquie
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-11-2004
Thu, 01-05-2006 - 1:14am

hey! maybe a personal trainer would be helpful. I had a gym membership, but never went, but went i got my trainer i started to go, mostly becuase of the extra fee i had to pay (which i signed a year contact for, and is withdrawn from my account weather i show up 2x a week or nnot), and partly becuase i have to make appiontments to have my hour with him, and i hate to be rude and not show or cancel an appointment. it might sound simple or silly, but it's worked for me as far as actully getting me to the gym, now as for eating, i struggle, but as hrd as i work in the gym, its like i dont wanna eat the 500 cals it just took me an hour to burn, so at least on days i go to the gym, i do better.
hope that helps!
email me anytime

mzbehavn78@yahoo.com

jamie
249/245/135

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-01-2003
Thu, 01-05-2006 - 3:52am

What about doing something drastic for 5 days? ONLY 5 days... You can do 5 days right?? It won't kill you... Follow a diet to the letter... and I do mean think of it as a "diet".. and drink PLENTY of water to flush you system... And if you like green tea (I love it), make it a point to drink 4 cups of green tea a day. Weigh once before you start and once after those 5 days. Don't be tempted to jump on the scale in-between. If you crave something, tell yourself that you can have it after your diet is over. Each time you feel you want to quit, log on here and post something. Even if you post 50 times a day.

I did that at the beginning when I wasn't losing. I lost some good weight.. most was water weight.. granted.. but it was weight gone and I felt good. I also lost some of my sugar addiction.. after a few days of no sugar, I didn't crave it that much afterwards. After the 5 days, I started adding small things back, but I wasn't eating as much as I used to.. stomach shrinking? maybe.. but mostly, I was motivated to continue the losing trend.

It's just an idea..
Mary
247/216/165

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-17-2005
Fri, 01-06-2006 - 7:59pm

misschiqquie...

all I can say is I have been where you are now. It seemed as though I was starting a new diet every week. And around day 3, my iron will rusts and crumbles and I find myself giving into temptation and trying to convince myself that I am too sore from the previous workout or that missing one workout won't hinder progress...yeah right. Once that happens the diet momentum is gone and motivation is lost somewhere and it's hard to get it back. I hate that so much...almost as much as I hate Nazis. (If you're a Nazi...I apologize profusely. I have nothing personal against you. I'm pretty sure you're a great person...on the inside. I mean look how well you and your kind follow orders)

Anyways...I am not going to walk around thinking I know all the answers. If anything, see me as someone you can commiserate with. I do know that the times that I am snacking or falling into temptation is when I don't have a lot to do. Days off from work and evenings home from work are the worse. It's like I have nothing better to do than to eat. To counteract that I try to make myself busy. That helps a lot. Have a lot of fruit in the house so that if you do feel like snacking you have a healthier alternative. Did you know that fruits are more than garnishes and accessories? No wonder Carmen Miranda was slim. That fruit has wasn't just part of a costume...no no. Think: easy access to a healthy snack.

As far as the gym is concerned...I am a very self-conscious person. Every time I entered a gym (which wasn't often) I felt awkward. I kept thinking that everyone was staring at me and whispering about me. Worse they were probably thinking how I didn't fit in among all the skinny, toned folk. I spent the first 15 minutes shyly walking around trying to find a piece of equipment that wouldn't make me look like an elephant on a unicycle. That kind of behavior is exhausting. Eventually, I had to get over it. I think, if anyone, I had more right being in a gym than Mr. and Ms. Fitness USA. It's hard. Especially if you have to do it alone...like me. But just imagine, how good you will look once you reach your goal weight. How good you will FEEL! There is no sense in complaining if you can't at least take the first step. I go to the gym fairly regularly now. I still feel awkward, but I feel better about myself after 40 minutes on the Elliptical.

So, go to that gym and then complain to me how you overdid it and how your ass hurts because those seats on the stationary bikes are too damn small. We'll both share our battle wounds and a bottle of advil. Just take it one day at a time.

til next time

randomgirl

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-15-2005
Sat, 01-07-2006 - 3:14am

Misschiqquie,
I've recently started on the whole weightloss track. I slowly made changes starting in Oct., but didn't really buckle down until Dec. I started going to the gym nearly every day, and I have to tell you, I cried the night before I was supposed to start. I live on a Navy base and figured I'd be the only fat person there and everyone would make fun of me. Wrong! What I found was people in varying stages of fitness, some no different than me and not one person laughed. If anything, they are supportive and encouraging.

The only things that keep me on track foodwise are drinking lots of water and journaling. If I have to write it down, then I tend to not eat as much. I can't have any binge eating or crazy snacking in writing for someone else to see! I leave my journal on my kitchen counter open to the day and ask my thin and totally fit DH to go through it occasionally. I also record the amount of water I drink and the exercise that I do that day.

Good luck with whatever you try and know there are many others who are cheering you on!

Laura
267/253/145

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-07-2006
Sat, 01-07-2006 - 9:03am
I hope you can do this. (read another thread?) I posted on mowgli-moon's 'new here' post and I hate to repeat myself but I am twice your age honey and in need of serious help myself. I, like you, know all the right things to do, only I cannot participate much in the exercise anymore. And that is not good. Just remember you must be doing this for you and your health. Maybe after you read my little story on the other thread it will motivate you. My health at age 32 was great after having 4 kids and all and still weighing 250 lbs. but the dr. kept telling me that as I got older I would be risk for HBP...he was RIGHT, so right. I now have horrible eyesight, a leaky heart valve, a heart murmur, I am getting my cholesterol down and of course I have the dreaded Fibromyalgia which is heriditary in my family but I think mine was caused by all the trauma from accidents/injuries. I am turning to this board for support. I lost my 104 lbs. in 1988-89 by joining TOPS (Take Off Pounds Sensibly) and that group of women was the best. I doubt if I would have done it anywhere else. The support really, really helped. We all had one cheat day and that was good too. But I never dieted and never starved. I learned a brand new way to cook and eat. I need to incorporate that back into my life, don't you think??? And at my age it will still be hard without the exercise. But the way I see it, a few short walks is better than none at all if that is all I can do. I hope to lose this year and I wish you the best at it too. I find keeping my personal life in control might help. If I am miserable I do opposite of what all my thin friends do. They all starve and can't eat, I eat everything in sight trying to console myself. Funny, huh??? Sound kind of goofie for a 50 year old. Well, good luck to you, I hope you can get motivated and remember just because you fall off of it one day it hasn't ruined everything, jump back on ASAP and keep going forward.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2006
Sat, 01-07-2006 - 1:45pm
Thank you all so much for all the support..
I feel alot better now, and I'm glad I finally decided to post instead of just reading
what everyone else had to say. =)
I've been talking to my mom alot about this lately, and my older sister (who is also very much overweight).
I guess I was trying to do it on my own before, but now I have 3 or 4 people calling me asking "Did you go to the gym today?" "Did you eat breakfast? You haven't eaten in 3 hours, eat an apple so you don't binge."
If I try to eat something bad, my sister practically beats me to redirect my attention.
As Martha would say.. It's a good thing!!
I'm going to keep posting, and I'm going to the gym in a few minutes. =o)
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-07-2006
Sat, 01-07-2006 - 7:52pm

I could have easily written your email about myself! I, too, have tried all of the diets- and did well on the low-carb one for awhile. But as soon as I give myself permission to be a little bad, then it's "take no prisoners"! I guess I don't have any advice for you, but I wanted you to know that I understand the struggle you are going through. I am reading James Frey's book "A Million Little Pieces" and I am struck at how his recollections of drug addiction parallel my addiction to food.

Just take it one day at a time and remember to praise yourself when you walk away from the cookies! :)