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| Thu, 05-25-2006 - 2:06pm |
what do you do when you know that you want to lose weight so badly that you ask your friends to join you cause there up there also! but instead of joining ;which is there right ;i cant make them join. but they continueously put dieting down saying silly quotes such as ;if they make it my size i'm wearing it !knowing there miserable i dont like hanging with them any more cause i'm about getting healthy and losing this .i want to be able to walk in the store and not go to the plus size rack and say oh well! my first goal is a size 20 then work my way down till i'm happy with me. my husband says i'm fine where i am but if i want to lose it go for it.and ignore your friends and dont even mention dieting around them because they get angry .but yet they become upset when people say how good i'm doing .i dont need negativity in my life .i need positive people arond me.which is why i get so motivated when i read some of you guys stories .the good and the bad we all have them and its nice to know someone's going through the same thing as you .i always thought that your friends were suppose to be there for you !but these friends are outrageous. so trust me i dont mention dieting any more. but if looks could kill i'd be in trouble! do anyone have friends who down your good job at trying to get yourself together.or are there actually friends who say good job !keep up the good work that be a change of pace for me .good luck to everyone and together we should get a good portion of weight off by summer i truly believe that!thanks for giving me the motivation to keep moving forward alot of you have good advice and alot of insight on dieting.thanks

Katherine
349.2/347.4/140 Mini-goal: size 26 jeans (Ultra mini goal: 314 pounds )
That's why we are here, to support you. We are all in this together.
I agree with your dh, don't mention it when you are around the negative people. They probably get angry when you get complimented just because they are so miserable with themselves-it really can be a jealousy thing.
You do what is right for you. you cannot make anyone do something they do not want to do. It's like telling someone to quit smoking. They are not gooing to do it until THEY are ready.
Come here and vent to us about them or anything else whenever you need to!!
We are here for you!!
Edited 5/25/2006 2:27 pm ET by cl-k_davey
Karen
I am sooo sorry you have to deal with that. I agree with Katherine that they don't seem like true friends. Yes there are some friends out there who are supportive. My best friend lost all of her weight after being overweight most of her life. She is now 5' and 104lbs and lemme tell you she is an inspiration to me. SO yes it is possible to have supportive friends and this is where I agree with Karen, I think they are jealous cuz they can't/won't do this for themselves. You keep doing what you need to do for you, if they don't like it then tell them you are sorry but this is for you not for them.
You can come here for support ANYTIME as far as I am concerned. This is my primary source of support as well. MOst of my family is overweight and they moan and groan and say they need to lose it but the only one that ever tries is my mom. Then there is the other side of my family (inlaws) that don't think they need to lose any weight and don't battle with it the way we do. Dh tries to be supportive but he tend to be like my family moan and groan and say I need to lose it then does NOTHING!!
Anyways I got off point but just wanted to let you know that we all go through similar things here, so we do understand a lot of where you are coming from. Please feel free to post and ask for advice/support anytime.
Angela
256/252
Angela
Good for you, to keep at it anyway!
I have a good friend who is about my size, and she continually jokes about wanting to die with a chicken leg in one hand and a pie in the other-- NOT a dieter, and not someone I can talk to about my dieting (or exercise) very often. She is still a good friend, though. This is just one of her "issues", and I'm trying hard not to blather on and on about my program to the world anyway, so she's a good check on that. I guess I'm hoping you don't throw out the baby with the bathwater and give up on these friends unless they're really making it a challenge to continue.
Hope you stick with it, and find support where you can (maybe here?)
Misha
I understand where you're coming from. It is so frustrating to have friends (or family) that do not support you in such a difficult and important path in your life. But you can't 'force' them into losing weight if they really don't want to. I remember people telling me how big I was getting and that I needed to lose the weight and although I knew they were right, it irritated me. I didn't start losing the weight until I wanted to lose the weight. The decision has to come from them.
Don't mention your weight loss in front of them. They may be jealousy that you're actually doing this. Even if they're aren't, you really don't need any negativity in your life. I am sure your friends are great in a lot of other ways, but don't turn to them when it comes to weight loss. Find other people for support (your family for example). And don't forget about us. We're facing the same struggles here and would love to give and receive support.
Good luck and congratulations on your achievements so far.