cant control my emotions or my weight

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-10-2006
cant control my emotions or my weight
20
Mon, 07-10-2006 - 8:47pm
i cant control my emotions the guy i like is leaving the countary i wont meet him cause im fat im going to lose him forever im devastated i keep eating im losing it everything is shattering im lost cant lose weight i eat eat eat im stressed out if he doesnt respond or talk to me or ignore me a bit i get devastated my mind is occupid with him all the time whats wrong with me i gained 30lbs thinkning about him and now cant lose it and cant even show him my face helppppp

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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-25-2006
Tue, 07-11-2006 - 3:33pm

You can do this, but do it for yourself not some guy, cuz if the guy don't like/love you for you, then you don't need him anyways!!! I hope you feel better!! I don't know what other advice I can offer you!

Angela

 

Angela

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iVillage Member
Registered: 05-19-2004
Tue, 07-11-2006 - 6:29pm

Angela is right. Do it for YOU! It will NEVER work, if you are doing it for someone else. It sounds like you are medicating yourself with food, and that's common! Try to focus, and tell yourself that you ARE in control of what you are eating. No one is forcing it down your throat. Go for a walk when you have cravings, or listen to music.

I don't think that I would settle for someone that didn't love and accept me at every stage of my life. Relationships aren't always movies, and music. There can be some nasty things thrown at you. They are hard, and if you don't feel you can lay everything out there, and be accepted, you are just setting yourself up for an unhappy relationship, an unhappy life.

Embrace your beautiful self, and know that whoever loves you, will be SOOOO freakin lucky to have you!

Tami
257/226/195



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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-06-2006
Wed, 07-12-2006 - 6:50am

Can you please change your screen name? You can't expect others to see

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-01-2006
Wed, 07-12-2006 - 10:51pm
Well said! We are so lucky to have such strong, supportive women on this board... and their advice is worth taking to heart!!!

Misha

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-10-2006
Thu, 07-13-2006 - 7:08pm
hey everyone wow! i had no idea that ppl will really care about what im goignt through and will not be judged, yes my friend is an issue for me and the "one" thing that sets me off to binge eating(eating bread madly till i hit the last piece in the loaf).I have worked out a meal plan and trying to do more cardio now starting july13(although i just binged seeing him talking to other girls!!!! and fearing losing him) anyhow must concentrate!!!! im 155.2lbs today and my goal is to lose 10-15lbs by aug11 :D lets see where i go. and im also the stress causing things from my life likeee dropping some tough college courses andd not worryign about what my mom thinks of me :) still when im a little alone even for 10mins i eat eat eat liek i cant sit still, rest for 10min wihtout reverting to food any suggestions???? its liek i go mentally blind and forgets everything.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-25-2006
Thu, 07-13-2006 - 11:31pm

I personally think it is hard to give advice knowing so little about you, so why don't you start by telling us a little about you? Maybe if we knew a little more about you, we could give you better tips!!

Angela

 

Angela

image

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-10-2006
Fri, 07-14-2006 - 12:09am
hi angela, yes you are right so here is 'my' story though it is emabarassing sharing it with ppl have never done this before but i think i need to open up. My relation with my friend(supposedly boyfriend) we met online a year ago hes now31 i will 23 in november we have seen each other only through photos i kinda started liking him and he too likes me though we never expressed , he gives me alot of hints about looking for girl to marry etc etc but i play dumb he wants to meet me and see me in person but i ignore mostly becouse he hold on numerous accounts about his ideal girl who should be really gorgous etc etc he has been in several realtionships and has alot of female friends no one close he claims. he wants to meet me but im scared to death of being rejected by him since im not the beauty hes secretly looking for/expects.I am 5'2 157lbs pear shapped my hips are 43 waist 35 and thighs 25inches just to meet him last year i dropoped from 180lbs to 135 till december i looked really beautifull i was so full of confidence and was on top of the world but then in feburaryhad some issues with mom and was tied up in an arranged marrige the tension took over me and since then i gained 30lbs till today. im over that thing but now my cravings are out of control i cant get tense anymore even the little tension and stress devastates me im unale to concentrate on studies and have finally dropped my smester today. anyhow i want to get my life under my control it is as if some invisible force makes me destroy everything. anyhow this guy i like hes leaving the countary now for a job in september and will surely ask me to meet him, i want to lose weight before i meet him in september which may also be my last chance to meet him i like him but i know he will move on hes experienced while hes my first love i can never tell him how i look like or i know i will lose what ever attraction he has for me, but deep down i know i will never be good enough for him sometimes i wish i just disappear it will keep on hurting me. anyhow i need to lose weight for the other proposal too must lose 15lb by aug18 for that!!!! oh God so heres my embarassing story.
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-10-2006
Fri, 07-14-2006 - 12:22am
i just posted myreply and right now im talking to him and i guess he doesnt like me that much:( im feeling kinda sad and im having this sinking feeling its 12:18am and i think im gonna go and madly eat atleast 8pieces of bread with 3cups of milk so much for my workout.
this hour ddint get any feeling of interest from him im devasted till the next time i talk to him
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-25-2006
Fri, 07-14-2006 - 1:41am

NO put down the bread. I am glad I couldn't sleep and decided to check in. Please don't do this to yourself over some guy. They are sooo not worth it. Believe me I love em as much as the next gal but if he doesn't like you for you, then hon, he really isn't worth it. It sounds like maybe your life really is upside down, and ya know what, a guy ain't gonna fix it. You have to do that for yourself. Trust me, been there done that. The guys never fixed the problems I had with me, I had to do that on my own! Now I am not knocking online romance by no means, that is how I met my husband after all, BUT there has to be some limitations as to what you allow yourself to do here. I mean, you don't sound very big, from the stats you gave, and if he wants skin and bones, then he will be wanting for a while if you ask me. There aren't too many girls out there like that no more. MOst guys I know, actually prefer a little meat on those bones!! KWIM?
Okay so you want to meet this guy? Then meet him, but don't kill yourself trying to lose weight for him. That isn't worth it. You say you were just talking to him and maybe he doesn't like you as much as you thought, well why do you say that??

Angela

 

Angela

image

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-17-2006
Fri, 07-14-2006 - 2:50pm

I wondering since your binges seemed to be centered around simple carbs. Do you know that eating large amounts of simple carb like that releases chemicals in your brain, the same way a mild anti-depressant does? What you are really doing is self medicating yourself. you've become addicted to the that jump in chemicals in your body.

Perhaps seeing a counselor might help,talk to them to about your binging on high carb foods, they might want to put you on a mild anti-depressant. maybe with that in your system, calming you down, and mellowing your mood swings, you won't need to binge.

Anyway I think seeing a therepist is a good idea. You said you were going to school, I'm sure there is a campus counseling center. You might want to talk to them.

Sara

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