Managing the third part...

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Managing the third part...
5
Wed, 11-29-2006 - 9:04am

Hey everyone,

I woke up this morning with an image of a three-legged stool in my head: one leg diet, one leg exercise, and the third leg, I don't know: psyche? attitude? mind? I've been so tuned into what I eat and exercising that I think I've had a complete disregard for that nebulous third leg. You know what happens when you try to sit on a stool missing a leg? You fall on your A*S and I feel like that's what's been happening to me.

We talk a lot about diet and exercise, and yet most of our shortcomings are because we lose focus, motivation, and somehow crumble. What are your best tips for getting and keeping your mind right?

Annie

A
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-08-2006
Wed, 11-29-2006 - 10:08pm

Annie,
This is a great question - I think mastering the third part makes the first two easier.

I am fortunate to work with an incredible personal trainer, and although a lot of what I've learned from him is how to work out, a huge part has been about how to treat myself and a whole different way to think about food and exercise.

He pushes me, but he praises me constantly - something I never got much of in my life before - he's taught me to say 'Good Job!' to myself (and to others-what a revelation!)When I look in the mirror, I stopped saying 'you look gross' I say 'Look at you - you look amazing'.

He's given me all kinds of little phrases that I write on index cards and put on my refrigerator:
- There are no shortcuts on my road to success
- How much do you want it?
- Food is fuel...food is not love
- Only I can be responsible for what I put in my mouth

So I have all these new thoughts to fall back on - When I eat junk, I ask myself 'Why did I do that? Who did I hurt by doing that? (me?)' Then I say - well, that's done, back on track...I say 'food is fuel...food is not love'and a lot of the time, I believe it.

He also says 'I don't care what you weigh - are you doing the work?' which has changed my focus from the number on the scale to whether I made good food choices or met my workout goals each day. (I still weigh every day though - because I like to know where I am!)

And he's taught me that I am following a plan for my life - not a 'diet' that has an end but a way of life and a set of values I can follow/adapt for the long haul.

So that's what I am doing for the third part of my stool.

SJ
225-173-135

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-25-2006
Thu, 11-30-2006 - 1:24am
That's a very good analogy Annie. I guess where I get my third leg to materialize is to not beat myself up so much. I'm still working on it so its not perfect....but I just tell myself that its okay. I tell myself its not the end of the world. I actually will sit down and think about what I don't like about my diet plan and think of ways to change it. I mix it around so that it might work for me better. I think positive thoughts like "I know its gonna click for real one of these days; If I keep trying then I haven't failed; I'll have such a great reward when I do this." I think about how GREAT I'm gonna feel.
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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-06-2006
Thu, 11-30-2006 - 8:22am
That's a very nice way to look at it Annie.. for me it has a lot to do with the right attitude. Taking this as a learning process.. and a journey made a huge difference. Maybe the next thing I need to tackle is to find motivation for faster results. I am allowing a lot to fall under the umbrella of "gradual change" and I am too forgiving.. I need some fire!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-15-2004
Thu, 11-30-2006 - 8:58am

I think I'm going to use the index card thing!

Brightest Blessings

~Dayle~

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 11-30-2006 - 2:39pm

Thanks for your insights on this everyone. I will do so well for so long and one day, badda-bing, it's gone! I've been on the board for a few months now and know that it happens to most of us. What happens? I don't stop wanting to be a normal weight, to live a healthier lifestyle, or to be a smaller size, yet out of nowhere I lose sight of what I'm feeding myself and get lazy about staying active.

You gave me some great tips and helped me remember that I'm a work in progress. I really appreciate your support. Annie

A