It's just so hard......

Avatar for susan970002
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-16-2003
It's just so hard......
7
Sat, 12-23-2006 - 10:20pm

Hi everyone,
I'm not having a good day and just feeling down because it's so hard for me to stick to a diet. Last night I was craving chocolate and had DH go to the store to buy some chocolate ice cream. He came home with low fat chocolate ice cream, which is good, but I had one bowl last night and it was more than a serving size and have already had two bowls today with more than a serving size. I think to myself when I'm eating junk food that I will just start my diet after the holidays. It's so DAMN hard to limit my servings. Does anyone have any suggestions on how to do this? My mom told me that instead of using a big dinner plate, use a medium sized plate. Do you think that would work? And I just can't stop drinking regular pop. It's not even diet pop! I just get so discouraged, I don't know what to do. Sorry this is so long, but I needed to get this off my chest. Thanks for reading and any suggestions would be helpful! -Susan

PS IT's also hard for to start exercising. I'm just so depressed about it.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-16-2003
Sun, 12-24-2006 - 3:31am

Oh man, I had a HUGE post written to you and then screwed up posting it! Arrrrgh!

Anyway, I'll see if I can remember the gist of it.

I think it might be a good idea for you to wait until after the holidays to begin your "diet". This is not the right time for you to start new. Play some games with your family, do some fun things and don't think about food.

Now, when you're ready to start, please remember one thing: You are not "sticking to a diet" you are changing your eating habits for the rest of your life. This isn't easy and it's a big life change. Once you look at this as a permanent state, you see things a little differently.

I know this because it's happened to me. I admit it's taken me many tries to make that attitude adjustment, but I think I finally get it. If I want to have a long and happy life, I need to start taking better care of myself, which includes eating healthy, drinking water, regular sleep and physical exercise and even some time for spiritual exercises, whatever one prefers. It probably helps that I'm on the verge of some major health problems, so it's sort of "now or never" and I want it to be now!

I keep a journal to encourage myself to fight on and not give up. I celebrate the successes and try to figure out the times I mess up. Journaling is a good way to be in touch with your feelings, whether it's online or for your eyes only.

I also keep a food journal, where I write down everything that I eat every day. I also add up the calories so I know where I am each day. I think this is an important step, especially if you're the meal planner for your family. My dh is doing this with me and he hates writing stuff down, but I'm just anal enough to enjoy it, lol, and it helps me to plan our healthy meals.

We're doing the least restrictive eating plan that we can find, so that we don't crave the "off limits" foods because there isn't anything truly off limits. We're doing the diabetic assn. "food exchange" plan, which balances carbs, proteins and fats. It's similar to weight watchers. If you want that ice cream, you can figure it into your daily calories or figure it as a splurge once in awhile. It's hard to eat just the 1/2 cup that is a serving size, but eventually you learn to savor it and make it last and it is satisfying.

Portion control has been the biggest eye-opener for me. I measure all our foods whenever possible and it's really helped me to see what a single serving size is! I've learned that we can eat pasta once a week (one cup serving only!) or hamburgers (4 oz. meat, 1 tsp. mayo and all the other extras we want) and most other foods that we regularly enjoyed before; we just can't eat as much. We've been at it for almost three months now, and it's getting easier to be satisfied with what we get. We still eat out for birthdays, we're eating regular food for holidays, we just have to cut the amount!

This is not to say it's all smooth sailing; there will still be times that we eat off plan; I actually had chili cheese fries a few weeks ago (PMS!) as dinner and I thoroughly enjoyed every single greasy bite. Then I went back to plan the next day and was able to get back in the groove. I just accept the fact that I'm losing weight slowly and that's okay. Splurges sometimes give a mental boost so that you can keep going with the healthy stuff! And isn't this how thin people live? They splurge once in awhile, but they eat less most of the time.

Don't cut calories too drastically either; your metabolism will slow too much and your blood sugar will dip, causing you to be constantly hungry. Find out how many calories you need to eat at your desired weight and then stick to that. Tell yourself you'll be eating that way for good. A good place to find out about calories burned in a day is www.caloriesperhour.com It's been a great tool for me.

Well, I'm not sure all my babbling helped, but know that its okay to wait until after the holidays; only you can say when you're ready. And I hope these suggestions help a little when you do start. Good luck and enjoy your holidays!

Mary
247/221.5/135




Edited 12/24/2006 3:35 am ET by ursaluna
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-20-2003
Sun, 12-24-2006 - 9:01am

Hey Susan,

this may sound tough on you, but this is my opinion and a swift kick in the butt.

STOP!! BREATHE!! You are getting yourself into a panic attack by looking at everything you can't do and just giving up and doing them into excess.

I am a believer in NOT waiting till something like the holidays are over, but to start immediately. Don't even wait to wake up the next day. Change your life today.

Now.. how to do that? Quit looking at the big picture. Focus on just ONE thing you can change for your life. Can you increase your water to 10 glasses a day (yes that is more than the 8 but the more you drink the more you pee away fat) Can you cut sugar one hundred percent? Splenda is amazing. They make Splenda ice cream, splenda diet coke (that I like better) heck, Cheesecake factory makes a Splenda Cheesecake :). Can you switch your white bread to whole grain? Can you find the RIGHT time of day for you to exercise (I used to think I hated exercise, till I realized I kept trying at the wrong time of day for me, now that I do it at lunch - I actually love it) Can you drink a glass of water EVERY time before you eat? that means snacks and meals.

These are just suggestions, you may think of one that you KNOW you can do, and just change that ONE thing. But whatever you pick, just make sure it's something that you can do for the rest of your life. Because with us, you are NOT on a diet, you are changing your life :) And you are changing it immediately.

The cool thing is once you change that one thing, you start to feel in control. Because when you are at the panic stage, you feel like you are completely out of control and it's scary and frustrating. When you get that control of the one change you start thinking... Hey I was strong enough for that, what else do I KNOW I can change? Then you pick up a second thing and so on and so on. Pretty soon, you are walking with a smile on your face and your DH is looking at you saying, "heh.. She hasn't asked for Chocolate in months, and DAMN she is looking HOT!"

I know you can do this, just focus on the ONE thing you can change TODAY. We are here for you, and I completely support you and want you to change your life with us TODAY.

*hugs tight*
~ Kim
314/232.5/135

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-25-2003
Sun, 12-24-2006 - 10:16am

I think you should take a big breath, a large glass of water. then get out a notebook or something to journal - write it then bite it.

second start now, why wait, if you wait there will be more pounds to lose.

get rid of all the trigger foods, don't allow anyone to go out to pick up a craving food. if its not there you can't eat it. if you want something, instead get up and do something else that will distract you from the urge.

try making a list of all the eating/exercise habits you want to change. then pick one and attack it. stay with that one until its a new habit. then move on to the next. you can't change everything at once.

you can do it.

Sue
302/136/160

Sue

 

 

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Avatar for susan970002
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-16-2003
Wed, 12-27-2006 - 5:20pm
Mary,
Thanks so much for responding to my post. I think I was just having one of those days where I was really depressed about my weight. I am going to try your tips, especially try keeping a food journal. I think that will really help with trying to figure out where those calories are going. I have been trying to figure out how many calories a day I want to eat. I thought maybe 1500 at first then maybe go down to 1200. Do you have any suggestions on that? Anyway, thank so much for your post. I just need to stay encouraged and not look at it as a "diet". -Susan
Avatar for susan970002
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-16-2003
Wed, 12-27-2006 - 5:29pm

Kim,
Thanks so much for your post. It made me laugh and I better about loosing weight. I did need that swift kick in the butt! LOL

Yes, I can drink 10 glasses of water a day, if not more! I am just going to stay focused on changing my life by watching what I eat one day at a time. I like splenda too...I drink it with ice tea and it tastes wonderful! I do TRY to exercise everyday and the past two day I have exercised by walking for 30 min. I walk at fast brisk pace and I enjoy it. I know I can do this and everyone here is great at support. I thank everyone for that!

Anyway thanks so much for replying. I really do appreciate it and I feel better about myself.

-Susan

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-20-2003
Wed, 12-27-2006 - 5:48pm

Woo hoo!!! Great job on the exercise :) keep it up :) 21 days... it makes a habit. - go for it Susan :)

~ Kim
314/232/135

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-16-2003
Wed, 12-27-2006 - 5:56pm

I'd say bounce between 1200 and 1500 a day. That way you can vary what you eat a little more and on the days when you have cravings or are a little hungrier, you can eat more and still be on plan. I strive for 1200 most of the time, but then if I go up a little for a few days, I'm okay with it. I just read somewhere that it's a good idea to change up your calorie count every day so you keep your metabolism on its toes, lol. It seems to work for me.

Glad you're feeling better and getting back to the right mindset! At least we have most of the holiday eating behind us now. Literally. LOL.

Take care~
Mary #3