Another newbie
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| Sun, 08-12-2007 - 12:11am |
Hello to all, I am brandy-new on this board. I am 51 years old, two teenagers, and weigh 335 - unbelievable to even myself! It definitely is a health issue, but also self-esteem, etc. I do not make much eye contact, if possible to avoid it, because I have seen that fleeting look of surprise, disgust or even revulsion from people who don't know me and are meeting me for the first time. And on and on and on, I'm sure if you are on this board, you know all too well what I am talking about (can you say "avoid mirrors", don't sit in restaurant booths, seat extenders on airplanes, avoid movie theaters, don't dare sit on a park bench, discreetly "test" a wooden chair in a restaurant to make sure it feels stable enough to hold your butt, heavy breathing from taking a shower or tying your shoes, yada yada yada.) My oldest left for college yesterday (youngest is still in high school) and I felt immense pangs of regret for not being able to fully do things with her -- because of my weight. Things like going on Girl Scout campouts and hikes, riding rides at Disneyland, even sitting in a college lecture hall during her college visitations - I couldn't do it because I could not even squeeze into those little desks they have. Honestly, I'm not throwing a "poor me pity party" here, truly I'm not - I'm just trying to be honest about some of the issues I have and have had and I truly want to change. MOre later about all that I've tried, which I'm sure will sound familiar to you :) (has anyone else ever tried the electric shock to lose weight treatment :) )
Well, enough of my story for now - I'll try to check in again tomorrow - just looking for some positive support here, like everyone else :) Thanks to all for listening...

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Hi and welcome!
I applaud you for being so truthful with yourself!
Annie
"We do not think ourselves into new ways of living. We live ourselves into new ways of thinking."  
Hi ladies, First, sorry for delay in replying to your most welcome "welcomes" :) It's been a tough last few days, oldest daughter is now (boo hoo) off to college... She's still in the same state, but about 100 miles away - I say close enough for weekend visits, she's thinking maybe Thanksgiving - haha or not so haha... Anyway, still have a teenage son at home who is thoroughly enjoying being an "only child" - :)
With that said, I plan to be as active on the board as possible, daily if I can... The stress and emotions of these last few days have left me absolutely CRAVING, of all things, Boston Market's mashed potatoes!! I did NOT go, but it was so hard, I know I felt like if I just stuffed enough mashed potatoes (okay, and gravy...) that I'd feel "full" and somehow banish these emotions - I figure the victory was in at least recognizing that, right?
Can anyone relate?
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