Off and On again poster...Success!

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-05-2006
Off and On again poster...Success!
4
Thu, 05-20-2010 - 10:51am

Hello All,

My name is Abbie and I've been here off and on over the past year, either as a poster or a lurker. I've been struggling with weight for so long...really my whole life although I was never extremely heavy until now. I started this journey at my heaviest of 237 pounds. I felt ugly, I felt defeated, I felt like I would never be happy or successful. My self esteem was down the tubes, I was depressed. I was a wreck! Not that I've conquered all of those things but here is what the past few months have brought me.

I started to really get serious in February. It wasn't a New Years Resolution as everyone constantly thought it was, it was just a realization that happened one night. I was sitting in front of the TV and I was starving. Only I wasn't starving. I wasn't hungry at all! But I kept getting up and finding things to eat. I don't remember what I ate. I don't keep many unhealthy things in my house, but whatever I did have, I would binge eat on. I just couldn't fill myself even though I knew that I had eaten all day and there was no possible way that I could be truly hungry. I thought to myself...Why am I doing this? And I decided that night to start the next day on a 6 week detox program that I had fiddled around with in the past and never finished.

The next morning I started and I blogged about it. I didn't have any members on my blog, that wasn't the point, but I wrote everyday and posted progress pics and measurements and kept a food diary. It was nice. It was nice to feel accountable even though it was only to myself. I think I kind of pretended that someday someone might read this blog when I felt more confident about myself and I wanted to finish this goal that I set out on. I wasn't perfect on my diet, but I changed what I ate drastically. I ate as many fruits and vegetables as I could find and after a few weeks I noticed something more than just weight loss. I noticed that I felt better. Those 6 weeks taught me that eating healthy changes my mood. I feel happier and I feel more energetic and it's not just about losing weight. I lost 15 pounds in those 6 weeks but I'm still far away from my goal. I think the best thing that I achieved was just the knowledge that I could do it and that I would feel good doing it. When I eat junk food now, I feel awful! I don't want to feel that way anymore. That heavy, gross feeling of having junk in your system. Eating clean makes me feel lighter, cleaner and I am starting to really like that feeling. It pushes me to make the right choices no matter where I go to eat, at home, fast food or restaurants.

SO - I have definitely had some ups and downs on the road. I've been on this journey now for almost 4 months and I've lost 20 pounds. My goal weight right now is 145 and I'm still about 75 pounds away. It seems insurmountable, but I'm going to keep trying! I recently started exercising regularly and religiously. I see huge differences in my body and I'm getting myself back. I went shopping last week for an upcoming trip and I went from a size 22 jean to a size 16. They are tight, but I cannot believe that I'm almost out of the plus sizes! I went from a 2X shirt to an XL in the REGULAR clothes section! I think that has been the greatest feeling of all. So hopefully I can post here more often and keep myself motivated. I recently found a website called myfitnesspal.com. I keep track of my exercise and calories there and it's a community kind of like facebook. You can link with other people and keep track of their progress and see pics. If anyone is on there I would love to be your friend!

So that's my report.
Abbie


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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-08-2010
Thu, 05-20-2010 - 11:01am

Sounds like your on the right track! Its amazing how once we get rid of the junk we use to eat and eat whole grains and fresh foods how much better we feel! Add in exercise and its just great I think! Im glad you are feeling better and not giving up. 75 pounds may seem like alot but heck you've already lost 15! You can do this! I hope you keep posting so we can keep up with your progress!!!


 


 


iVillage Member
Registered: 05-05-2009
Sat, 05-29-2010 - 3:14pm

Hi Abbie!

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-25-2008
Tue, 06-01-2010 - 2:42am

I know I am late in replying to this, but what an inspiring post. I hope you continue to do great in your weight loss you are off to a great start! I like the idea of keeping a blog just for yourself, I may have to do that as well.


I wish you continued success and I look forward to reading your post of your 75 lb goal ACCOMPLISHED!


ANN

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-19-2009
Tue, 06-01-2010 - 9:19pm
Thanks for the motivation! Great job! hope you keep coming back here!





How your body looks on the outside reflects what you are doing to the insides. How long do you want to live? What do you want your body to say about you? Do you want to be seen as weak or strong? How far below your potential are you functioning? What are you letting hold you back? KNOW YOU HAVE THE ABILITY TO CHANGE YOUR LIFE AT ANYTIME!