Boy have I got problems...can you help?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Boy have I got problems...can you help?
20
Sat, 08-16-2003 - 5:18pm
Okay, it has taken me awhile to overcome this and not feel so ashamed where I can finally talk about it and now I'm here begging for any advise you can all give me. Heres the story and I apologize if it gets long.

Approx. on June 28th I took my last BC pill and got my period. (My decision to stop the pill was because through experimenting myself, I had discovered it was causing my hormonal migraines monthly and it wasn't stopping my spotting...which is the reason I was on it to begin with to stop the bleeding!) Then in July I got my period 1/2 week early. Which isn't unusual for me. When not on the pill I'm never regular. Then August comes and WHAM! Last Saturday I had one of the worst mood swings I've ever had in my entire life! It was aweful! I don't even remember what set me off, but I just blew up at my poor dh. I swore at him like never before and threatened divorce! Ladies, it was terrible. All the while, deep inside, I knew it was wrong, but I honestly could not stop myself. Then a few hours later, 15 minutes before we are to leave for a wedding, I get the most aweful pains in my lower abdomin! So bad that no matter what I did, I couldn't overcome it. Not laying down, standing up, crunched over, or sitting. The pains were so bad I thought that something was terribly wrong with me. I took 4 tums and 4 ibeprofren and left for the wedding. Slowly it went away. Took about 45 minutes. Then Sunday I get my period and I was pretty much okay. But Monday...whoa baby look out again! Its a feeling that is so hard to explain. Its all consumed in my head. Its kind of a pressure feeling along with heat and a feeling of bursting! I'm at work, not wanting to be there, not liking ANYONE around me, and wishing they would all just disappear! Knowing I was like this and afraid of how I would react if I communicated with anyone, I just kept to myself and did my job. Believe me, it was HARD! Since this day, I've been doing fine. During this time I still workout, drink plenty of water, pretty much do as I normally do. HELP! I've decided that if this happens again I'm making an appointment with a OB gyn. My girlfriend today recommended one to me and I think I'm going to call him. I'm not happy with the doctors in my hometown and this one is only 30 minutes away in the same town that ds goes to school in. I'm thinking that if this happens again, I also need to call in sick at work. I really shouldn't be around people when I'm like this. Seriously ladies, I can totally understand how crimes can occur when a women is PMSing. Its an aweful feeling that is so uncontrolable and very scary! Oh and another thing. Since being off the pill I've also discovered I'm allergic to latex....hhhmmmmmm.....but dh ordered some that are latex free so we'll see how that goes. Okay, I'm a mess, I know. I've resently heard of a natural type of drug called "Serenity". Has anyone heard of that one and do you have any info on it? I'm not crazy really! Only one or two days out of the month!

 

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2003
Sat, 08-16-2003 - 6:05pm
Hey, Tweety...

First, Whoa!! Yes, make that appointment with the doctor and be clear to him. Tell him exactly how your mood is changing.

Have you purchased this book? Christiane Northrup, M.D....The Wisdom of Menopause. It will answer quite a few of your questions. All about our periods and such!

DO get that appointment..keep it and get this squared away for you, girl. You love to have fun and this is not you. Not the Tweety I remember..right? This too shall past but find out what is going on and then you can focus on it and make a positive change.

Anyone else? Let's support our Tweety. (Hey, at times our Men Folk, need a WAKE UP call)

Hugs, Michele

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-21-2003
Sat, 08-16-2003 - 6:16pm
Oh Tweety! That sounds terrible!

I'm not able to help much other than offer my sympathy and my agreement that you get yourself to an OB stat. Sounds like the descriptions of early menopause some of the women at work told me about. There are things that can be done to help. But you need a doctor who'll *listen* and realize that migraines aren't an option, but neither is losing your control so intensely.

I do hope that s/he can find a good solution for you quickly.

Also - do talk to your dh when you're in control and calm and apologize for going crazy and explain to him so he'll understand what's going on and not hold it against you or freak out. That'll help you feel calmer and more secure, less guilty about things that happen that you simply can't control without help, and a little less ashamed and afraid. Remember, he's on your side, but you have to let him be. So remember to talk with him.

Love and hugs,

Anna

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-27-2001
Sat, 08-16-2003 - 7:00pm
Lisa, I can certainly sympathize with you and understand it, too. I am 52 and have been going through symptoms like that for a while. I finally had to go to the doctor and talk to him about it. I was no fun to be around....even for myself...and it's hard to get away from yourself. He put me on medication that helps control the hot flashes and mood swings. I know that many on this board do not like medications but I believe in a good quality of life and to me it's worth it.

As for your dh....just talk to him and explain and he will understand. We all have arguments with our spouses....he loves you and will try to understand.

Meanwhile, make an appointment and see a doctor. Many hugs to you. You can e-mail me if you need to because I've 'been there and done that'.

Nancy

Nancy

"Make Choices that bring you joy"  cl-Patty


 


iVillage Member
Registered: 01-03-2001
Sat, 08-16-2003 - 7:30pm
tweety, you have nothing to be ashamed of.Hormonal changes can do this and more to women.I would encourage you to find a DR you like and you trust. Someone who absolutely takes you seriously.Be very open and honest about how you feel.Be careful of trying "natural" things. Always discuss with a Dr if you're going to do that.Alot of over the counter products are misleading.

I agree with talking to your DH about how you feel.I don't think men really understand what our hormones can do to us.

Please don't ever be ashamed of this.You'd be surprised at how many of us probably go thru things like this.Just know we're always here for you.

Miss P




 

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Sat, 08-16-2003 - 8:58pm
Thank you all so very much for all of words your wisdom and advise. I think Monday when I come home for lunch I will call and set up an appointment. Nancy, I just may be emailing you. This is a very scary thing to be going through and I will need continuous support. To all of you, I do have to tell you that I have spoken with dh. I actually did shortly before I started to get the pains before we left for the wedding. Funny thing happened at the wedding too. The priest told everyone there to turn to the person next to you and tell them you love them and tell them WHY you love them. I turned to dh and said, "I love you dear because you put up with my moods" and we both chuckled. Yeah, he's a good guy. I'm very lucky. So anyway, just wanted to say "thanks" and I'll keep you posted.

 

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Sat, 08-16-2003 - 9:18pm
I'm so sorry to hear that you're going through this difficult time. I agree with everyone else about consulting a good dr. I've never heard of anyone having such severe abdominal pains just due to hormone changes, unless they were menstrual cramps or fibroids or something like that. There may be something else going on causing problems, as well, which the dr. can diagnose and treat.

I'm a firm believer in quality of life, and if that means taking a prescription with no more than minor side effects to achieve it, then go for it! These problems are just as valid as diabetes or anything else that someone has to take medicine for, so don't be embarrassed or ashamed. The only shame would be to do nothing about it and have it continue to affect your health and relationships negatively.

I'm glad you got to the point that you felt you could talk about it and hope you'll be able to get an appt. quickly. Please keep us posted and let us know if there's anything we can do to help. You know we're here for you (and so's your family).

Hugs,

Rhonda

       ~~Rhonda~~


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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-24-2003
Sat, 08-16-2003 - 9:44pm
{{{{Lisa}}}}

I agree with everyone here....there is NO need to feel ashamed....we are all women and it is important that we be able to talk and ask advice when we need it.

Get to a doctor and get checked out so that you don't jump to any conclusions. I don't think that it's a great idea to take anything before speaking to a doctor. You may mask symptoms that are important to a diagnosis....so don't wait and make that appointment so that you will have peace of mind and start to feel better.

It may be a part of peri-menopause and it may not. I'm not a doctor so I can't tell you...but what I can tell you is that symptoms do vary, so it is possible that it is that.

I have never heard of 'Serenity'. Who markets it? I will ask my DD if she has heard of it...but again, don't take anything until you speak to the doctor.

Take care and hang in there.

*Shayna*

Avatar for sharonalee
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Sat, 08-16-2003 - 10:27pm
Oh Tweeety, I am so sorry that you are going throught this rough time. Please be careful of the "natural" remedy, so many times they are more dangerous than what your doctor may suggest. Please make a doctor's appointment as soon as posible. Perimenopause is a rough time for so many of us. The most important thing is to have a good quality of life and to be happy and healthy. I have been on a discovery myself on what to do during this painful stage, and as much as I hate to take meds of any kind, if I ever find the right one for me I will take it. Please take care of yourself !

Super Hugs

Sharon

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-08-2001
Sun, 08-17-2003 - 9:00am
Tweety,

I'm so sorry to hear that this happened. It's certainly nothing you should feel ashamed about. I've been experiencing this mood swings also. My period has in most cases been months apart but yet I still feel those monthly PMS feelings but they seem to be even more intense. I've lost control of myself where I've hated where we live and pretty much hated everyone around me. It really is a horrible feeling and I can understand how you feel.

I would heartily agree that you need to make an appointment with a Dr. and I don't think I would wait to see if it happens again especially with the abdominal pain. I have a gyn appt this week and this is one of the issues I need to discuss with her also. I also just read an article about a condition called pmdd (premenstrual dysphoric disorder). It's actually a much more intense form of PMS. They're not sure of the cause other than they think it may be caused by flucuations in the hormones which may cause a deficiency in serotonin which is the brain chemical that regulates mood. And since you did say you had recently come off the pill and whatever else may be going on if your perimenopausal your hormones are in turmoil. Just a thought and maybe something you could discuss with the Dr.

I just really hope you can find a solution and I too would stay away from any "natural" remedies. We're all here for you Tweety!

Many big hugs,

Susan

Avatar for bootywhompus
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Sun, 08-17-2003 - 9:49am
Tweety, honey...

Please do go to the doctor. If this one doesn't listen, try another. What an awful thing to have to deal with. I totally could have written that post myself a few years ago. For me, it was fits of absolute and instantaneous pure rage. So much anger and it didn't take much to trip it off and send me off on a rant, usually filled with expletives I forgot I knew. Then the swing to the other end with crying and not being able to stop. I've also had that abdominal pain you're talking about and it is not fun.

Lots of people don't go along with it, but I'm absolutely certain. I take BCP and an anti-depressant. The BCP helps with the physical aspects and the anti-depressant keeps me from going off the deep end. I'm not saying that this is what you need. Only that it is what works for me. I get migraines too but taking a magnesium supplement everyday has really helped.

Keep us posted. We're here for you. Take care.

Lori

Lori

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