Is this a BU**ER or what

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-03-2001
Is this a BU**ER or what
6
Tue, 11-25-2003 - 8:48am
DH's birthday is today and his parents forgot!They gave him a card last week but when he stopped in their house today they never said Happy Birthday or anything.I could tell it hurt him and I certainly understand how he felt..Thankfully my parents called with birthday wishes and my sister even left him a singing message.

I think his parents are distracted by an open house my BIL wants to have next weekend.My DH has to take his Dad somewhere because his Dad doesn't want to be home for it.My MIL told me I may be invited to serve punch.I'm going to reach deep inside myself and be a big person and try to just go with things.Tis the season, right?

Miss P




 

Avatar for imthebigsister
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 11-25-2003 - 10:22am
Well, it's not the same as having his parents call, but Happy Birthday to Rick!

I love the rest of your message - how presumptuous of them, like you don't have anything to do with your time except wait for their call. Like you say, 'tis the season to be jolly, generous, kind, and thoughtful, but it goes both ways.

Make that pie for DH especially good!

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-15-2003
Tue, 11-25-2003 - 10:41am
Are they just plain getting forgetful AND silly???? Invited to serve PUNCH???? As if you're not a busy woman.
“You can only grow if you’re willing to feel awkward and uncomfortable when you try something new.” -Brian Tracy
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 11-25-2003 - 10:50am

Happy Birthday to Rick! It would be nice if his parents were just planning to do a little surprise thing and wanted to make him think they forgot. Maybe you could remind them, just in case... As our parents get older (and us too!), it becomes harder and harder to remember everything. And, the more we have on our minds the easier it is for that to happen.


I'm wondering if maybe they think being "invited to serve punch" is an honor or something. They may not want just anyone to serve punch at their open house. I'm learning that people have very different perceptions of the same situation. Going through "one of those"

       ~~Rhonda~~


<

Avatar for bootywhompus
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 11-25-2003 - 11:50am
Invited to serve punch, huh? I'd probaby invite them to kiss...never mind. You need to get caller ID and ignore some phone calls girlie. You have a life too. And in spite of what they might think, it doesn't revolve around your in-laws.

Hey there Patty's DH! Happy Birthday you lucky duck...er...chicken...er...Happy Birthday!!!!

Lori

Lori

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 11-25-2003 - 2:13pm
Happy Birthday to Rick!

Live With Passion!

Phyllis

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-06-2000
Wed, 11-26-2003 - 8:21am
Happy birthday to Rick! Hope it was a good day despite his parents' oversight. They sent a card, but just didn't pass along wishes on his birthday. Can't blame him for being bummed. Yanno, I wouldn't say anything to his parents about it - if he feels compelled, let him bring it up. He can do that just by sharing with them the other birthday wishes he got or what y'all did on his birthday. Even if a spouse has good relationship with in-laws, it can still come off wrong (ie. in-laws think spouse is trying to hang guilt on them), making a situation worse.

On the punch serving... I'd normally take it as an honor, that I was thought of for the situation even if the event doesn't sound all that grand or fun, or that a punch server is even necessary. The only thing that gets me in this instance is "I may be invited to serve punch" - MAY be. That's kind of like "Stand by - we might have use for you coming over here, but we're not sure, we just want you to be ready to jump at our command." That's not an invitation but someone planning for you, and that's not how it should be done. You simply ask the other person if they'd be willing to be there to serve guests, and leave it at that. None of this dangling. It's rather evident you're not needed, and I wouldn't block out my weekend for it. You have the option of saying "Can't make it, sorry" and I wouldn't feel guilty.





Cussette, CL for Family Finances
Visit the Family Finances Website

for links, tips, reading, tools and answers to your financial questions

C