Staying focused, is hard!

Avatar for dmm11730
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Registered: 04-06-2003
Staying focused, is hard!
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Thu, 09-16-2004 - 6:48pm
It is very hard to stay focused on what you want. I admire many of you that you fit in exercise and eat healthy, maintain and loose those unwanted pounds. I ordered the slim in 6 tapes and they arrived yesterday afternoon. I read the litature and they are telling me the same stuff as before, its all common sense. I need to watch the tape and start. Unfortunatly its an Aunt Flo week and my energy level is at an all time low. I am not sleeping well at night, going to be to late and up to early. My eating has been very good and healthy for me. I am proud of that. My water is 8 to 10 glasses a day. I just feel like I am stuck in this rutt. Almost like I am watching myself and yelling saying move it Deb. I just so wish I had a buddy and more time to work out with. Bill has been very good about his eating but unfortunatly I do all the work. Pack him breakfast, pack him lunch, feed him dinner.........you understand. I had my second fitting for the dress and she needs to do a little more work in the bust area. My flabby under arms are gross and the back across the dress looks horrible. I will be wearing the scarf most of the day, just to hide it. As you can tell I am not feeling well about myself and I dislike feeling this way. If I had just one wish it would be a selfish one, and that would be to loose like 30 pounds in the next week. I know it a horrible thing to wish for but its how I feel now. This day is right around the corner and I have to smile and pretend for my sisters sake, and I so hate being phoney. Well after work all day, running for the dress this afternoon, a hop into the grocery store and now dinner is almost done. I still need to clean the kitchen, empty the dishwasher, and switch another batch of laundry but I so, so, so do not feel like doing any of it. How do you ladies do all you do, everyday and still fit in time for YOU? Please tell me your secrets! Right now I feel like a nap!

Deb

Debbie

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Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 09-16-2004 - 9:48pm

I wish I could tell you some magic secrets that would work, but believe me, if I knew them I'd be putting them to use on myself. I'm so sorry to hear that you're feeling bad about yourself. I know just how you feel, because if I could wish something for myself, it would be the exact same wish as yours (if that makes you feel any better). I know the things to do, I even have the time to do them many times, but I don't. I can't understand what's wrong with me.


You probably look better in the dress than you think, since we all tend to be harder on ourselves than others are. I think once the wedding starts, and you are focused on your sister's happiness, you will feel genuinely happy too. Just remember that everyone is so worried about how they look that they aren't nearly as concerned with how you look. LOL! We're all a bit that way -- worried if we're making a good impression instead of zeroing in on every detail about other people.


I have to keep hoping that something will come along to jumpstart me back into action. Surely, something will do that for you too. At this point, I think hormones are working against us, plus you have a very full plate every day.


Hugs,

Rhonda


Time invested in improving ourselves cuts down on time disapproving of others.

       ~~Rhonda~~


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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-18-2003
Fri, 09-17-2004 - 6:08am

First...lets look at the really good part in your post.


 








 
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-08-2004
Fri, 09-17-2004 - 7:36am

{{{{{{{DEB}}}}}}}}


Slow down and take a breath.

Lori

"Remember, I'm pullin' for ya.  We're all in this together." --Red Green

cl for Ask the

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-08-2001
Fri, 09-17-2004 - 8:25am
Deb,

You mention that you're not sleeping well, Aunt Flo is on the loose (miserable creature that she is), you're working, running a household which would be enough for anyone to not see ourselves in a very good light. Right now you're focusing on eating right and drinking your water that's a great thing. Focus on small things right now. I'm suffering from a very preoccupied mind at the moment and focus is out of focus too. You do need some time for you even if it's just a few minutes. Phyllis and Lori gave some great advise.

You're not alone Deb-life is hectic and many days just vastly overwhelming but hang in there.

Hugs,

Susan

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Registered: 01-03-2001
Fri, 09-17-2004 - 9:35am
Deb, I read this earlier but wanted to come back when I had more time to respond.Then I read your post from this morning.Deb, I don't get it all done and I really don't think anyone does.My house is a mess because it's last on my list of things to worry about.And I have learned to take time for myself; for exercise, time with my sisters and friends, time to just do nothing.I read a line the other day that said "you can't keep giving others water if your well is dry".You have to take time to give back to yourself.Your family will benefit from that.

Sounds like you're doing great with food.I really admire that. I do terrible with my diet and am constantly trying to do better.As far as exercise, I wonder if you just haven't found what you really enjoy yet.When you really enjoy exercise you will be more inclined to stick with it.

You have an icredible schedule and work load and I really think you don't give yourself enough credit.Focusing on the positive about yourself will be a much greater incentive than focusing on the negative.If you look at a part of your body you like you will be more inclined to work harder at exercise.But if you look at your body, focus on what you like least then you're just setting yourself up for defeat.You will be saying"what's the use??"

Yes, it is hard to stay focused.Some days I do and some I don't.I just do the best I can and let the rest go.

Thinking of you.Let me know if I can help in any way.

Miss P




 

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-27-2001
Fri, 09-17-2004 - 11:37am

Deb, I read your post and thought..."how does she know exactly what I am feeling?"

Nancy

"Make Choices that bring you joy"  cl-Patty


 


Avatar for ive_got_five
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-11-2001
Fri, 09-17-2004 - 1:19pm
Hi Deb,

I can relate to the time thing. When I dropped off the exercise wagon I was doing 30-45 minute cardio workouts. Then when I thought about getting back to it, I felt I just didn't have that time, so I just kept putting it off and putting it off. This time back, I started out with 10 minutes on the Stairclimber and 15 crunches and pushups. It's something I'm able to fit in when I have a few minutes and I'm not having to carve out a big block of time. I've even squeezed it in between making lunches and my shower in the morning. It's *something*. Most days now I do more than ten minutes and the odd day I don't do any! But since it's such a small amount of time, I can't justify the excuse that I don't have time anymore! Just take 5 minutes and move. Do something and you'll probably find that it will snowball! I know I'm finding it's making a huge difference for me. The scale hasn't moved down much, but my clothes are fitting much better and my posture is improving. How about keeping some handweights by your chair and use them in the evening while watching TV? Just a thought.

Enjoy your sister's wedding and don't worry. I bet you'll look lovely in your dress!

Shar

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Registered: 08-31-2004
Sat, 09-18-2004 - 9:02am
Newbie here.

I just want to give you a hug Deb. Everyone has already said so many of the thoughts I wanted to say so agreed, agreed, agreed.

What a load of mess I grew up with watching Leave it to Beaver and the Brady Bunch, They never got it all done. It was done for them in "makeup" and "special effects". Here in the real world we have Aunt Flo, kids ,hubbies, jobs, bills, housework etc etc etc.

The good news is I have today to do. I like that we can do this the way we want to. So when the "stuff" gets in the way of taking care of myself. The only way I know to consistantly stay focused over all is to do it one day at a time. I am preaching at myself here. If I can just drink the water , eat right, get some exersise, love myself... one day at a time.
Avatar for dmm11730
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-06-2003
Sat, 09-18-2004 - 2:10pm
Come on Rhonda, you must know some magic secrets.......? Thanks for the reply. The main focus is on Sharon and I am so happy for her. My intensions were never to take it away from her or make it about me. I just wanted to look nice for her. She did pick me for her Matron of Honor.

Deb

Debbie

Avatar for dmm11730
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-06-2003
Sat, 09-18-2004 - 2:16pm
Thanks Phyllis, and you are 100% right. I need to look at what I have acomplished. My eating is much better and I could drink any water drinker under the table. I do not drink soda or iced tea. I would say that 98% of what I drink on a daily basis is water.

I watched the first in the series of tapes yesterday afternoon from the Slim in 6 collection and then did it later on. Not so easy to do, I worked up a sweat and my muscles are screaming today. Making that commitment is difficult but not impossible. I need to motivate myself in many areas. Thanks again for the help, and support.

Deb

Debbie

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