Monday's check in

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-27-2001
Monday's check in
26
Mon, 03-24-2008 - 6:48pm
How was your day?

Nancy


"Be kinder than necessary, for everyone you meet
is fighting some kind of battle."

Nancy

"Make Choices that bring you joy"  cl-Patty


 


Avatar for eclectic5777
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 03-24-2008 - 11:11pm

Grace,


So sorry to hear you had a reaction to the medication.

You Were Born An Original...   Don't Die A Copy

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 03-25-2008 - 4:59am

It was a mixed day. Rob had a really hard day and night the night before. We stayed up till after 3 AM talking and he wound up sleeping in my room. The separation anxiety hit him all of a sudden and hard. He has a lot of anxiety and doubt, as I'm sure all inductees have at that point. A mother wishes she could take that all away for him, but it's part of what he has to go through to become a man and the kind of person he hopes to be. I kept myself together amazingly well for his sake.


We spent the day together going to his bank, getting a drink at Panera, looking in Target to kill time, visiting his recruiting officer and watching a film there (got 2 pictures of them together for posterity), went to register him at the Ramada Inn with the MEPS liason and checked his room out, got his truck washed, got a phone card for him at WalMart, and then went to visit his best friend and his family to chat and say good-bye. It was after 5:30 by then, so we came home so he could get his last bath for a while and get ready to have dinner.


Tim, Rob's GF, and best friend got here about 6:30. Rob had requested going to a Japanese steak house nearby that does the Benihana thing at hibachi tables, so we went there. He'd just been to another one like that 2 nights before, but he likes Japanese food a lot. Our chef was very funny. We got a few pictures at the restaurant too. We came back to the house and had to say our good-byes. He and I got a little upset, but I managed to save the bulk of mine for when I got in the empty house. Tim came in briefly to see if I was OK (I was) and gave me a big hug and surprisingly a kiss on the mouth. I did it back just out of reflex/feelings/habit and didn't think anything of it till it was done. He took Rob to the hotel and got to have some alone time with him and gave him a letter he'd written to him. He called me after he dropped him off and said Rob did well and that he thought he would be fine. I think our long talk the night before did both of us a lot of good. He really needed to vent his feelings and be reassured that they are totally normal and to be expected and that this is all temporary. He knows we have something in common, because we are both starting new lives alone at the same time. We'll both get through it and be stronger for it eventually.


No word from Mom yesterday. I guess the "ice queen" expects me to call her about my plans for visiting dad, since she is "the mother", but after she left without saying good-bye to any of us I'm not feeling too obligated to make the first move. I do believe she's ill, but we also enable her. If she did go to see Dad yesterday, she didn't call to let me know how he was doing. She knew I was spending Rob's last day with him, and I think she was a little annoyed about that, because she probably wanted me to go to the nursing home. For his sake, I will go today, but if she doesn't call or show up, I don't think I'll update her. She has to stop this kind of behavior for her sake as well as everyone else's and she won't get help. Something is going to have to force the issue -- tough love or something.


My stomach went into spasms as I heard Rob's friend's truck pull away last night, because it sounds like his. It went away after about 15 minutes. I did wake up at 2-something with the left side of my throat draining and burning, and the dogs got me up at 3:30 barking at something. Now that I'm here in the house alone, I flipped on the outdoor spotlights and I haven't been able to get back to sleep since. Rob will be getting awakened in

       ~~Rhonda~~


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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-03-2001
Tue, 03-25-2008 - 6:18am

Miss P




 

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-03-2001
Tue, 03-25-2008 - 7:05am

I finally had a fantastic run yesterday morning. Headed outside and it was really good. I had ordered a pair of my favorite running shoes and had those on, wondering if it made a difference. I found them online at a great

Miss P




 

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-27-2001
Tue, 03-25-2008 - 7:50am
Margie, I love the cut on you and, by the way, YOU LOOK FANTASTIC!!!!

Nancy


"Be kinder than necessary, for everyone you meet
is fighting some kind of battle."

Nancy

"Make Choices that bring you joy"  cl-Patty


 


iVillage Member
Registered: 02-27-2001
Tue, 03-25-2008 - 7:53am
Rhonda, I have been wondering how you were doing...... good luck to you in adjusting to all you have to adjust to right now.
Nancy

"Make Choices that bring you joy"  cl-Patty


 


Avatar for dmm11730
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-06-2003
Tue, 03-25-2008 - 8:10am
Margie you have me after only one cup of Lipton this morning but I have to tell you that I admire you so much. What a wonderful wife, mother and grandmother you are. I love your hair but not just the hair..........the face, the attitude, the positive and confident look. Wow! You look great lady and you really have me thinking why can't I do what she has. Like Rhonda said you look 10 years younger then when I saw you in DC. I love how you think, your actions, your kind words........you are just an all around positive person to be with. I am glad I had the oportunity to meet you last year, I look forward to seeing you again in the future and I so enjoy reading your posts here on the board. Thank you and you look wonderful.

Debbie

Debbie

Avatar for dmm11730
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-06-2003
Tue, 03-25-2008 - 8:23am

Rhonda I know you know that we all have been thinking of you so much. I really do not know what I can say but I will try my best. It sounded like you had a good day/night with Rob which I am sure you both needed. Your words that this is something he needs to go through to become the man he is to be is so true and I guess we all need to let go at some point. I am lucky even though I complain that my boys are still home but I know sometime in the future I will have to let go also and I am not looking forward to it. It sounds to me like you did a beautiful job of saying goodbye with support and love and understanding. I am sure Rob knows how you feel and knows that you are thinking of him and praying for him all the time as I am sure he is thinking of you.


Your situation with your mom and dad is difficult but your mom has added to the pressures of your dad. I know she probley has not done it intentionally but nonetheless she has. I think you stepping back from her for a day or two might make her realize how lucky she is to have you. You do so much for her and your dad. I wish you continued luck there.


Your kiss with Tim was probley what you both needed and it is fine. I do not think you owe anyone especially to yourself an explanation. You both share a strong bond together and although right now you are going to be heading into opposite diretions you still love and care for each other. Do not dwell on what was, work on the what is to come...........like we have said before, you are a wonderful, beautiful strong woman that gives so much of herself each day, now is the time for Rhonda to work on Rhonda.........the Rhonda campaign, can I get a bumper sticker?


I hope today is a good day for you. I am sure you are going to be lonely and that is alright and natural. Giving you hugs and an invite to travel up to NY for a few days...........I would love to have you!

Debbie

Debbie

Avatar for dmm11730
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-06-2003
Tue, 03-25-2008 - 8:27am
Jdeb loved the spa, I sure wish my Bill would let go and do this. He would never, hates all the giggy stuff like oil rubbed on or letting someone rub his feet........he thinks he is too tuff for it. If he only knew what he was missing..........well maybe I need to keep my mouth shut and just enjoy that stuff for myself, lol. Your weekend away sounded so special......glad you had the chance to do it.

Debbie

Debbie

Avatar for bootywhompus
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 03-25-2008 - 8:41am

Margie!

Lori