Family/Friends Sabotage Diet?

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-19-2008
Family/Friends Sabotage Diet?
5
Tue, 05-20-2008 - 2:08pm


Do you ever feel that any of your family or friends


try to sabotage your diet and fitness?


It's a b

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-15-2007
Tue, 05-20-2008 - 2:16pm

Too funny about us having the same idea today. Well...Jillian Michaels did at least!


Chocolate seems to be the food of choice for sagatoging.


Grace


Be like a postage stamp.

Be like a postage stamp.  Stick to it until you get there.

Bob Proctor

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-15-2003
Tue, 05-20-2008 - 11:45pm
Funny...one of my dear friends and I had the same email conversation today (we should IM, we email all day long).
“You can only grow if you’re willing to feel awkward and uncomfortable when you try something new.” -Brian Tracy
Avatar for juliedean
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-07-2003
Wed, 05-21-2008 - 7:52am
It’s almost like they were friendlier towards me when I had a bigger weight problem than I do now. To me, my friends look good but I don’t know…maybe they feel differently about themselves.



Seems clear that this sort of thing has everything to do with your friends and nothing to do with you. We never really know what's going on in other people's heads -- maybe your success made them envious, or maybe it reminded them of something they hadn't succeeded at yet themselves, or maybe they feel threatened, as if you'll change or become "too good" for them someday. Who knows? It's probably not rational or intentional, whatever the reason is.



It's a slightly different situation, but I remember back when my best friend met the man she eventually married. Neither of us had ever dated much, so we hung out together a lot. But when she connected with "Jim," I had a very difficult time being happy for her. Intellectually, I knew that reaction was stupid and childish, but emotionally, I couldn't help it. I felt unworthy, I thought our friendship would weaken, etc. It took a long time (i.e., over three years) for me to finally get over myself and grow up, and be sincerely happy for her. I didn't actively sabotage her relationship, but nether did I go out of my way to be supportive. I imagine it's the same sort of thing with friends who don't yet seem to value your weight loss. Maybe they will in time, but in the meantime, they're almost surely dealing with their own issues. And tough as it might be sometimes, we can't let other people's issues interfere with our progress.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-15-2007
Wed, 05-21-2008 - 1:44pm

Your experience reminds me of when I was a teenager and

Be like a postage stamp.  Stick to it until you get there.

Bob Proctor

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-15-2007
Wed, 05-21-2008 - 1:48pm

I love food and I love to eat and I do go out with friends who are that way too. One is a Jazzercise instructor, one is a group exercise instructor and the other goes to the gym sometimes. We all workout but we talk about food a lot. Funny thing, even when teaching, the instructors turn to food. Some even admit they are thinking about what they are going to eat after class. Boy, we are hopeless.


I just have to keep saying to myself that I would be huge (huger) if I didn't exercise.


Grace


Be like a postage stamp.

Be like a postage stamp.  Stick to it until you get there.

Bob Proctor