Vent - no advice needed just sad
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| Mon, 05-03-2004 - 5:59pm |
I'm 30 years old divorced for the past 5 years. I was devastated by my divorce, husband was cheating. Anyhow, he left me with a lot of debt accumulated on credit cards. When he left I was making 9 dollars an hour and being proud at the time, I didn't ask for help, so groceries and car repairs often went on my credit card.
Fast forward, I went to counseling, got myself together, then went back to college through an accelerated saturday program. 10 hours a day on saturday I was taking two courses, I did this for 3 years working a full time job as well.
The credit cards due to the debt from him and then car repairs and groceries for over a year, I got in way over my head, just necessities that many of us take for granted like groceries, gas, shampoo etc. I certainly wasn't living high on the hog. I didn't want to file for bankruptcy, mainly because I'd like to buy a home and I don't want it damaging me, so I put all the credit cards into a credit counseling service, I pay them 350 dollars a month and they worked things with the credit card to pay reduced payments and get no late fees or anything like that. I've been doing that for about 2 yrs now.
So I got a new job in August of 2002, I lived an hour away. One year of working there commuting during the winter (more than 3 times it took me over 4 hours to get home during storms) I decided I needed to find a place closer. Well the closer you get to Boston, the more expensive. I found a cute place. It was 150 dollars more a month and I also had to pay gas and oil (gas for water and stove and oil for heat). Needless to say that extra 300 dollars a month really tightened the old belt.
I've been roughly doing at least 5 hours OT every paycheck just to get my head above water.
My HR person comes and tells me today that I went over my sick/vacation time by a day and 1/2, not sure how I did this but apparently I did. So she's taking 12 hours out of my next paycheck. THAT IS 200 dollars. That is going to kill me. I almost burst into tears at work.
I don't know what else to do I try so hard. I'm lucky there is no chocolate in the house. I look at how far I've come, got out of a marriage, put myself back through college and graduated with honors while working a fulltime job, changed jobs and moved and yet I'm still financially strapped.
I'm 30 years old. I feel like such a loser.

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LH,
I just wnated to say that I totally understand. Due to a divorce also about 5 years ago, and then finishing school. I live at home, with my parents. I am in so much debt, the ONLY way for me to move out is to claim a BK and even then I'd need a roommate. I feel your pain. Every little thing can hurt. I am going to Hawaii in 6 weeks and stupid me forgot that I'm not getting paid. I have been saving up my money for Hawaii, and well, in the end, I can't take it with me. =( It was something that I did to myself.
But, just know that you're not alone, and that you will make it. I know money is tight, can you cut back on anything for one month? Be strong. Something will come about.
~Cher
I don't have cable.
I am right now getting by on spending 40 dollars a month on groceries.
I haven't done anything recreational in some time.
The 200 dollars out of that one paycheck puts me below my rent so I am going to have to borrow. I HATE borrowing.
I'm going to assume you don't want to, or can't ask payroll to adjust it $100 outof this check, $100 out of the next? Some I know are willing to help, some can't.
Wow! You are on a VERY tight budget. I don't know how you do it. Well, good luck. I wish I could help, but Im just as broke.
~Cher
-Michelle
Lovin, I am feeling for you.
LH- please remember you are far from being a loser! (Maybe weight wise, but not in other regards!)
{{{HUGS}}} to you!
Perhaps borrowing some money for this month isn't a bad plan- though you don't want to, it might just be what helps you get through this rough time. Have you got a dairy or something where you could try and figure out when you took those 'extra' days? Or could your employer show you when you took them? If you're not sure you actually had them- you might want to double check on it!
On a side note....the article about "Stress Proof Your Workday" is on page 158 in May's edition of Fitness.
The main points are-
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LH...Hugs!
I'm going to see if she can take it out in the June 4th paycheck, then it won't be such a hardship on me.
I don't work "in" boston, but I moved from Southbridge where I was paying 600 dollars a month rent to Leominster where I am paying 750 plus all my utilities. It's a 300 dollar difference when you factor in the cost of oil and gas. Its been brutal. I'm just scraping by and for the most part not.
Right now I've been living on cottage cheese and jello for the most part and steaks that my dad bought me. LOL
It's rough. I have a splitting sinus headache today. Oh well, I'll suck it up and ask for help, I already called and warned my mom that i may have to borrow, I don't want to have to do that but if need be I will.
Thanks for all your help guys.
PS Whereabouts West? I used to live in Southbridge, went to college out in the Springfield area..hehe!
Well, we live in Warren...so we're paractically neighbors!
Well I talked to her this morning, and my boss went to talk to her yesterday and clarified that I was sending my request forms to my other boss but he wasn't forwarding them on to her, so I technically was only over by 1 day, so she is taking 4 hours this paycheck and 4 hours next.
PHEW! I won't have to borrow money and if I put in a little OT 4 hours won't effect me too badly.
I worked 5 hours OT for this paycheck as it was, so I'll just have a couple bills I was going to pay this paycheck that I'll have to put on hold a little bit longer but that's okay, I'll at least be able to pay the rent and in July I'll get 3 paychecks so if they have to wait until then so be it.
I'm feeling a little better, but still upset some what, I am trying so hard to stay above the water and it really feels like someone keeps coming and shoving my head under. I've been looking for a 2nd job not in retail so that when I go back to school in the fall I could keep it.
Some days I really consider filing for bankruptcy.
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