Is Your Mate Sabotaging Your Diet?
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| Mon, 01-23-2006 - 2:00pm |
Whose Side Is He On?
Dealing with diet sabotage from your guy
by Elizabeth Somer, MA, RD
For many women, when the weight creeps up and they decide to do something about it, they don't get the support from their mates that they expected. In one study, nine out of 10 women seeking help from obesity experts stated that sabotage was a serious obstacle to their efforts.
"There are a variety of reasons why some husbands try to undermine their partner's attempt to lose weight," says Edward Abramson, PhD, professor emeritus of psychology at California State University at Chico. A man might anticipate that if his wife gives up ice cream or chips and gets fit, he will be expected to do the same. As long as she is overweight, it's all right that he's fat, too. "The trade-off factor is a common reason for sabotage," says Abramson, who cites the example of a husband who has a problem with drinking, gambling or smoking and feels that as long as his wife is unsuccessful at weight loss, he won't be expected to quit his habit.
"Then there is the chastity-belt phenomenon, where her love handles have been his excuse for their dismal love life, or he fears that if she loses the weight, he won't be good enough for her anymore," Abramson says. In other words, he might sabotage her efforts in order to avoid confronting deeper or more personal, uncomfortable issues. You know you've got a sabotage issue on your hands if:
- Instead of praising the Cajun salmon salad, he complains that it's not pork roast and gravy
- He grumbles that you're not buying all the goodies he is used to having in the house
- He offers to do the grocery shopping and brings home lots of tempting foods not on your meal plan
- Rather than walk with you after dinner, he brings home a box of chocolates to reward your efforts
- He complains that he's lonely when you leave the house to exercise
- He gripes about the cost of your gym membership, aerobic classes or exercise equipment
- He surprises you with KFC after you ban fried foods from the house
- When all else fails, he becomes sullen and angry for no apparent reason
A hefty support team is crucial to sticking with a healthy eating plan, as well as shedding pounds and keeping them off. Research shows that women are most successful at maintaining nutritious eating habits when their partners participate in their diet and exercise routines. In one study, women were three times more likely to stick with a weight loss program and lost 35 percent more weight when they joined the program with their hubbies than when they signed up solo. People also are most likely to follow healthy diet plans that lower their risk for diseases, such as heart disease, if they can count on encouragement from loved ones.
Favorite Family-Food Makeovers
Many of your family's favorite foods, such as steak, gravy and meat loaf, are right up there with Mom and apple pie as all-American symbols. Too bad they are also icons for an unhealthy diet. They don't have to be. Try these slimmed-down versions of four best-loved foods. You will improve your health without sacrificing your family's taste buds.
- Cheeseburgers: Make small hamburgers using a 50-50 mixture of ground turkey breast and ground sirloin (7 percent fat or less by weight). Top with leaf (not iceberg) lettuce, sliced tomatoes, a thin slice of reduced-fat cheddar and gourmet mustard, and serve on a whole-grain bun.
- Mashed potatoes: Substitute skim milk or fat-free half-and-half for whole milk, and cut the usual amount of butter in half. Throw in a few tablespoons of fat-free sour cream for a rich and creamy taste.
- Sausage pizza: Top a ready-made pizza crust with tomato sauce, sliced bell peppers and red onions, precooked and sliced chicken sausage links or crumbled turkey sausage, and a small amount of grated reduced-fat cheese.
- Bacon and eggs: Scramble two egg whites and one whole egg. Serve with Canadian bacon, whole-wheat toast with marmalade and fresh-squeezed orange juice.
Talk with other women about diet sabotage.
Excerpted from 10 Habits That Mess Up a Woman's Diet by Elizabeth Somer, MA, RD, Copyright 2005, Published by McGraw Hill.



