Equlibrium

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-18-2003
Equlibrium
11
Wed, 04-05-2006 - 3:07pm

My life equlibrium that is.

~~ Steffy ~~

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: heyhowru
Wed, 04-05-2006 - 3:56pm

Steffy-

Big (((hugs))) to you as you go through this life upheaval.

I noticed that right after my divorce I was 10 pounds thinner without even trying. Of course that was when I met DH. Once we started dating I put on 20 pounds, slowly at first but after 2 yrs there it was & here it is 1 year later & its still here. Although in those 3 years since I met him I finished college, bought a house, got engaged, got married, combined households, got used to a whole new routine, blah, blah, blah.

I can honestly say that I was very happy after my divorce because my first marriage was a major pain in the a@@ but I am sooooo happier now that I'm married to DH. I'm not sure how much stress or emotions have to do with my weight loss or gain. I still think a lot of it has to do with hitting the big 35, which I did right after DH & I started dating.

I think maybe its a combination of everything & there is no real way to sort out why we lose or gain during times of change. I do know that the best thing to do is to eat right & exercise & not worry about the weight fluctuations. You've got enough going on right now to be worried about stuff like that.

Good luck with this new chapter in your life. Take time to get back into a healthy routine & enjoy yourself.

HTH!

Ann

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-09-2003
In reply to: heyhowru
Wed, 04-05-2006 - 4:54pm

Well we are kind of in the same boat here, maybe the exact same one. Rich, other wise known as DH, told me he wanted a divorce on New Years eve and then left about a week later and found out about the internet indiscretion a couple of days after that. I have lost 7 to 8 lbs. since. However, I'm sure mine is because I was just devastated by all this and I seem to have this line where stress will cause me to eat and then as that becomes depression I stop eating. Trying not to rehash all this because I know I've gone over this way too many times here already. lol


Now that I'm coping better my appetite is back and I'm trying to take advantage of the weight lose and at least try to maintain. I still have some bad days because we are trying to reconcile or come to some closure one way or another.


I too have felt upended and hopefully in the end uprighted. It was so weird thinking of my life as not a wife and the definition of "my family" changing. I thought how will anything ever be okay etc. Not to mention all the wondering about my failures. However, as time goes on I realize we will be able to share parenting just fine I won't have to miss a


iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
In reply to: heyhowru
Wed, 04-05-2006 - 5:17pm

Steffy-- first off BIG HUGS!! Now I don't think I can answer the metabolism question, but can definitely offer my 2cents on your post:


Sure, I think (and know from personal experience) that 'life changes' can affect weight. And this can go either way. I think it all depends upon

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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-04-2003
In reply to: heyhowru
Wed, 04-05-2006 - 7:00pm

Hey Steffy - you have been through a lot over the last year - and I'm a big believer in our bodies being affected by our emotional health.


I know many people who have gained weight once they get married, and I know I packed on some pounds when I was with my now-ex-fiance.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-18-2003
In reply to: heyhowru
Thu, 04-06-2006 - 10:58am

Ann ~ thanks so much for your kind words.

~~ Steffy ~~
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-09-2003
In reply to: heyhowru
Thu, 04-06-2006 - 11:15am
Well said Steffy!


iVillage Member
Registered: 12-04-2003
In reply to: heyhowru
Thu, 04-06-2006 - 11:58am

We learn a lot in our expeiences...our character is built through our lives falling down around us!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
In reply to: heyhowru
Thu, 04-06-2006 - 12:27pm
Not only is that emoticon for prayers and positive thoughts....it's also a BIG round of applause for you Steffy!! You are on the right track, keep on plodding onwards, and upwards, and downwards where needed ;-)

~IslandGirl


Success is 10% talent and 90% heart!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-15-2005
In reply to: heyhowru
Thu, 04-06-2006 - 1:36pm

Big hugs to you.


I think life around us, period makes us gain or lose. When I got divorced, I wasn't even trying, but I lost 20lbs in like 3 months. I didn't realize it until someone asked me and I said, "I dunno, but my clothes sure are loose". I got on the scale and was like HOLY CRAPPOLA!!! 20lbs w/o even trying. Then I moved home to my folks house. Immediately put on 10lbs from mom's cooking and me eating a "real meal".


When with K, we ate out Friday night, sat, sun. When we broke up, I ate, but I ate sandwiches, or had my shakes. I also needed something to occupy my mind, so I started running more. I lost 10lbs in those 3 months. And within a month of getting back with him, I"m up 6lbs, and has even gone as high as the full 10. Point being...yes, we walk a lot on the weekends, but I also eat a lot more being around him. When I live alone, I don't eat a lot.


So, up, down, up down up down. It's not so much stress (although I do know for a fact that CAN keep weight off), as much as it is lifestyle. You never drank, and now you drink. That's a lot of extra empty calories. If you're still eating the same, and working out the same, then yes, yo'ull gain weight. K and I walk a lot, but overall, it's maintaining our weight because the excess of food and junk we eat. So for me to lose, I have to work out

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-01-2006
In reply to: heyhowru
Thu, 04-06-2006 - 2:21pm

Hi Steffy, looks like I'm coming in late on this one, sorry.... but I wish I could give you a hug and tell you I'm sorry that you have gone through heartbreak. And there were several other stories in reply that were equally sad... hugs to all of you. About your question about stages in life and how it effects metabolism... thats an interesting question and although I guess its impossible to say really, because of the variables,

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