I've had an epiphany - long

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
I've had an epiphany - long
6
Thu, 04-13-2006 - 1:52pm

For the last 2 years I have been miserable & struggling to lose 20 pounds. I tried every diet, joined the gym, etc nothing worked. I'd lose a few & gain them back. I starved myself, made myself sick, got very depressed & was in general, a mess.

I went to a new Dr last month who helped me come to a realization that maybe I am meant to be at this weight & there's nothing I can do to change it. I am physically fit, I eat healthy low-calorie foods, I work out 3 or more times a week, my cholesterol levels are great. She asked me why I wanted to lose the 20 pounds & I told her it was because I wanted to be the size I was when I met DH. She asked me if he cared about my weight & when I told her he doesn't she told me to stop looking a the scale. She told me to stop judging my self worth on my dress size & realize that not everyone is thin & not everyone stays the same size their whole life. It really hit me when she asked me how I was going to be comfortable getting heavier when I'm pregnant when I now am stressing over 2 pounds? I don't want to be crazy like that, I want to be as healthy as I can be so I can conceive & carry a healthy baby.

Could I stand to lose a few pounds, sure? Who can't? But to risk being miserable & depressed isn't worth it. I took her advice to heart & have decided not to focus on losing weight. Not that I wouldn't like to, but my main focus will be to be healthy, through proper nutrition & exercise.

So I went through my closet & got rid of eveything that was too small. I had been holding on to so many clothes waiting to fit into them again. My mom got a great new wardrobe out of it though! I then went & bought 3 new outfits for summer & some new jeans.

I guess I'm putting all this out there to remind us that its not about what size you wear or how much you weigh, its about being healthy & happy. I think most of you here know that but it took me a while to learn that lesson.

Ann

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-26-2004
Thu, 04-13-2006 - 2:01pm

That's a great post. I think most of us would say we really do want to be healthy rather than "thin." But it sort of stays in the back of our minds, at least in my mind, that I could be thinner, or I could be a size smaller. You are so right, though. We do all of these things for our health, not to look like someone we're not.


lorie6-26-09.png Lorie 6-26-09 picture by runningwomen

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-15-2005
Thu, 04-13-2006 - 2:46pm

I think that's great!! And you're right, sometimes, our bodies just stay at one place. I know for myself, I'm not there yet. I'm just at a plateau. And kudos to your doctor for asking the very important question of....how are you going to handle being pregnant. I know some women don't do well being pregnant. Heck, I knew one woman who after 4 kids, wanted to get an abortion because she had gotten lipo not long ago, and was sick of being fat. Fat meaning pregnant.


It is all our minds doing and what we think we should be at. I know I'll never weight 100lbs again, although, I do know for myself, I need to lose weight for health reasons. Heart disease, cholesterol, diabetes, they all run in my family.


So, good for you and keep up the new image of you, being healthy!!! Honestly, this is when I think of models who are "big". They still look wonderful. They are fit and healthy. They're just, well, bigger. :) Hugs.


iVillage Member
Registered: 12-04-2003
Thu, 04-13-2006 - 2:53pm

Ann, I'm so glad you had that talk with your doctor!


And you are both right "Healthy isn't a size"!


For the longest time my goal weight was what I weighed in high school.

Avatar for lovmy2kids
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 04-13-2006 - 2:59pm
I totally agree with you.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-09-2003
Thu, 04-13-2006 - 3:26pm
Yep, yep, yep. I know I get confused when I'm "unhappy" I think if I lost a few pounds I'd look better and feel better about myself. Well just taking care of myself makes me feel better about myself. I many not be that "ideal" image I have created in my head but just getting the exercise and the benfits of eating healthy do a world of good.


iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Fri, 04-14-2006 - 3:29pm

I love your post, and all the threads responding! Thank you for posting this Ann!


It's so true....health and fitness IS more important than the 'perfect' body! I'm sure we all know people out there who have a body we crave, but if we look at their lifestyle and health choices don't want to be them at all!!


I'm impressed with how your doctor approached this too. Kudo's for her to think 'outside' the box!


Here's to health and fitness :-)

~IslandGirl


Success is 10% talent and 90% heart!

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