Commenting on weight loss and portions?

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-07-2003
Commenting on weight loss and portions?
9
Wed, 11-29-2006 - 4:48pm

I have been thinking recently a lot about how people will chastise people for what they do not eat. For instance, a mate of mine has told me twice about how my ex and her current work collegues tell her off for eating a can of soup for lunch. What am I supposed to do, say oh yeah you should be eating more when she knows that what I used to eat. I did reply to her and said "what is wrong with a can of soup, that's what I used to eat and no one had a problem with me doing it? She looked a bit dumb founded and I said well I guess people don't comment on how little you eat if you are fat...

I personally don't like to comment at all on what others are eating and I really hate it they talk about what I eat. The deal is that when you comment on some and not others, you are sending a message that some people should not eat as much as others - granted I am wanting to lose weight, however one must still be healthy. It also comes across as a subtle way of telling someone they are fat/overweight. The other danger is that one can get addicted to this type of stimuli, the control of not eating and being able to get attention for it, aka a nice little eating disorder. I also try to not look for comments about my weight loss, as well sometimes you can get the backhanded one here and there - ie you look so much better now that you have lost that weight...so gee before I was disgusting? lol

Again, I prefer to go unnoticed in my diet exploits. I would rather people did not know I was trying to cut down; I prefer to have the shock and awe when I turn up looking thinner. ;) they can say you look good, that's cool cuz well it's nice after the hard work to get some kudos.

So what are you thoughts? Is this just my little pet peeve or does it bother other people.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Thu, 11-30-2006 - 11:16am
That sort of thing bothers me too....though if I ask for your opinion I want an honest answer, don't sugar coat it for me. But like you, I don't give my two cents without being asked.

_____________________________________________________

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-04-2003
Thu, 11-30-2006 - 1:28pm

I agree that some people don't consider how they are coming across when commenting on weight or eating habits. I really think that if you want to make a comment on how great a person is looking fine, but you have no business commenting on what they eat, or how much they weigh.


The only exception would be if it was someone you were close to and you really felt that they were at risk for developing an eating disorder or other harmful habit.


Honestly, you can't just say "I'm just being honest" as an excuse for rudeness. It doesn't make you a "straight-shooter" it makes you a b!tch. LOL


iVillage Member
Registered: 05-07-2003
Thu, 11-30-2006 - 1:57pm
I like your attitude. Granted I am very honest with my friends, but I do like to think I have some tact! I used to have a problem with too much dieting, if you get my drift, so I am a bit sensitive to what people say about what I eat and how I look. Ironically I am far fitter than a lot of people out there, and lately I am starting to like how I look. Wow did I just say that...just 18 more pounds to go.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-12-2001
Thu, 11-30-2006 - 3:18pm

It drives me NUTS when people comment on what I'm eating without me asking for their opinion. If one more person looks at my lunch and says "You need to eat more than that. How long are you going to stay on that diet?" I'm going to run from the lunchroom screaming like a madwoman! LOL Everyone at work considers me "thin"... but I work with a bunch of heavier women... I know what I'm capable of looking like and I'm surely not going to lift my shirt so everyone can see my "roll" and say - "SEE - THIS IS WHY I'M DIETING!" lol I was always brought up it was rude to comment on other people's food and I definitely don't do it myself!

- Vanessa


iVillage Member
Registered: 08-29-2005
Thu, 11-30-2006 - 7:31pm

I think it depends on the circumstances...For more than 1/2 of my life, I lived with my mom who was (is) the queen of yo-yo dieting.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-04-2003
Fri, 12-01-2006 - 12:56pm

I guess at work we are all

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-18-2005
Fri, 12-01-2006 - 1:48pm

There is one girl here at work who makes rude comments about others food choices, diet plans, lack of diet plans, etc.

The WeatherPixie <
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-29-2005
Fri, 12-01-2006 - 9:32pm

I know the type!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-16-2005
Sun, 12-03-2006 - 9:24am

I think nosy people are going to continue doing what they want to do and nothing we say is going to deter them.

I personally would NEVER comment on what someone is eating if someone asked my advice about a certain food or what not than I'd give it but I'd never comment on say "hey why aren't you eating more" or "hey you shouldn't be eating that" it's none of anyone elses business.

As far as complimenting people, I compliment people on their hair or outfit, I rarely compliment someone on their weight unless I know they are trying to lose weight and I haven't seen them in a long time and they have lost a lot of weight and I'm like holy crap. Because if I have a holy crap reaction I think they deserve praise because they have done a lot of work to get there. But if it's just some random person at work that I don't know whether or not they are trying to lose weight, no.

Smile,

Deirdre