Don't Hate Me Because I'm Thin

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-05-2003
Don't Hate Me Because I'm Thin
26
Wed, 07-20-2005 - 9:57am

Hopefully, some of you ladies might understand why this bothers me.

I post to the 20-something board (seeing as how I'm 24) very regularly. And quite frequently, there are discussions about weight/looks/exercise/eating right, etc. And it seems as though there are many chunky/overweight girls who post for advice on how to eat right, etc. BUT as soon as someone says something that implies that they might need to cut back bad habits, etc, they get all defensive and go off on a tirade about how "I Love my size 16 body (even though I'm 5'4") and I want to see "real" women in the media". Granted, there are some stars who are way too thin, and obviously that is not healthy. But it REALLY irks me to hear those girls make derogatory comments about thin/in shape people in general- calling me "stick-thin", etc. Last time I checked, I was a "real" woman, even though I'm small. I cannot help that my bone structure makes me a size 0. But if I stopped exercising altogether and ate half the crap these women do, I'd get fat too! My dad, whose side I take after, was fat for several years when he was younger. But I inherited my frame from him- when he met my mom, he was a size 32. And he was healthy. And I am healthy too- I have never once had a doctor tell me I was unhealthy or too thin.

Why is it that people cannot make this distinction between anorexic supermodels and those of us who take care of ourselves? I don't want to have to feel guilty for not continually keeping a box of cookies in my cabinet or not liking fast food all that much. I feel like people are just too lazy- and it's not like most of these girls are so obese that it can be blamed on genetics. Thoughts? Comments?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-15-2004
Wed, 07-20-2005 - 10:18pm
Very well said. You make excellent points about fat corresponding to lazy.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2003
Wed, 07-20-2005 - 10:19pm

What is also unfair for someone thin is that you're sometimes made to feel like you have to justify why you work out.






iVillage Member
Registered: 09-02-2004
Thu, 07-21-2005 - 8:28am

I will add more later, but I just came across this article:

The couture body

Here are the physical requirements for a high fashion runway model, according to Elmer Olsen of Elmer Olsen Models. Models working for local commercial clients such as The Bay, are usually slightly shorter and larger in circumference.

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Between 5' 9" and 6'

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A long, lean and willowy body.

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Hips must be under 36 inches and depending on the designer, 35. Definitely not a heavy chest because it looks bigger in clothes. Size 34B is perfect with a 24 to 25-inch waist.

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Short waist and long legs.

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A long, slim neck.

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Broad shoulders.

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Long arms.

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Slim, fragile ankles.

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Long beautiful nail beds for beauty jobs.

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Flat ears are preferred but not a necessity. They can be fixed with

Photoshop.

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Generally well-toned, not too much muscle.

_________

Now THAT is what I would call unreal standards for 99.9% of women.





Lilypie First Birthday tickers
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-11-2004
Thu, 07-21-2005 - 9:30am

again, i haven't read the posts, so i don't know for sure what's going on there, but it sounds to me like you are making a lot of assumptions about these other women - how do you know who has an "honest-to-god" problem and who doesn't?


i think there is a bit of a "chicken and the egg" problem here - you sound like you are being judgmental of them, because you are feeling judged by them, and i bet if they are being judgmental of you it is largely because they feel you are judging them. i think the best way to handle any sort of perpetual motion situation like that is to just be the bigger person and be tolerant and accepting of others regardless of how petty they are being.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-11-2004
Thu, 07-21-2005 - 9:54am

you don't need to point that out to us. we aren't judging you. the point is just that maybe these women aren't judging you based on your body as much as on what they perceive your attitude to be.


you'll note that i am careful not to assume that my interpretations about what people say online are correct. i don't say "mary is x, y, and z" -- instead i say "from what mary has said, it makes it sound like mary is x, y, and z." (except sometimes people like jean who i feel like i know well enough to interpret what she says.)


i don't think others (like the women on the 20-something board) should decide they know you just from what you say online either. BUT one still needs to take responsibility for how her statements are going to be perceived. for instance: i never said that you were trying to look like a supermodel. HOWEVER, you do make a lot of comments about trying to look a certain way, wanting flat abs, getting in shape to be in your friend's wedding, etc... people reading those repeated posts could naturally come to certain conclusions about you from reading those posts. i'm not saying i have an opinion about it one way or the other. but if you make similar comments on the other board, it would be totally unsurprising if these other women have decided that you are a thin, healthy, and beautiful

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2003
Thu, 07-21-2005 - 12:52pm
Yeah, if you didn't interpret what I said everyone would probably think I use Neoprene water bottles.

Jean,






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