My food epiphany
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| Tue, 07-26-2005 - 2:59pm |
I was trying to catch up on what I missed on the board when I came across Chrissy post about "don't hate me because I am thin." As I read the part where she called (or seems to be calling) people who eat lots of junk food lazy, I became very sad. Being prego and very hormonal I got really depressed thinking, "Am I just lazy?" I thought about the way I eat compared to the way ya'll eat (I know I shouldn't do that, but...) and began racking my brain to figure out why I eat the way I do. Here is what I realized:
I didn't have much of a mothering mother. She isn't completely "there", so I missed out on a lot of important information growing up. This included my ability to make good food choices. Here is a sample menu from my childhood:
Breakfast-brownies, pudding, or cake with whole milk.
Lunch-coldcuts on white bread, chips, candy bar with kool-aid
snack-cookies with kool-aid or whole milk
dinner-something fried with two or three starches on the side with kool-aid
desert-jell-o, pudding, cake...
snack-candy bar, coke
Not to mention that there were always bowls of candy around the house with no restrictions put on them. I was a pretty lean kid because I was just as hyperactive as I am now, so I don't think anybody ever noticed that I didn't eat well.
Then I went to college. I ate like the typical undergraduate-lots of pizza, pasta, sugary cereal...But what is amazing is that I ate better during college then during my childhood.
When I graduated college I worked 9-5, trained tkd 5-9 (I was competing heavily at the national level), and dh worked 3-9 as a gymnastics coach. When we were home the last thing either of us wanted to do was cook or clean up. So I ate lots of fastfood and pizza.
Then came dd. I no longer trained tkd, but I became a gym rat. I started to learn about fueling the body to be able to perform. I realized that my eating habits would rub off on my precious little girl. So, I started to eat whole grain bread, fruits, and vegetables.
I have come a long way in the last four years considering my childhood. I eat good food to fuel my body, but I also eat junk food. Am I lazy? No. I realized throughout this thought process that I like to eat, my mini culture has dictated to me what I prefer in food. Yes, I try to limit my cookie intake, but I am not going to not eat them if I want them. I am enjoying food because I like it!
I just wanted to share this with all of you. I think I have a healthy outlook on my food now. I also wanted to say thanks to ya'll for inspiring me. I have learned so much about diet through you. I still don't know what hummus is, but I'll get there :)
Love ya'll
Paula

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For the record, I don't consider the hormone-driven cravings of a pregnant woman a mark of laziness. It's like PMS, but spanned out over a longer period of time and it's beyond your control. My point is that I hate it when women let themselves go, sit on their a$$es and eat crap all day- then they whine about how fat they are and ask for help, but the second someone says that it's good to be in shape, they get defensive, start railing on the media for causing everyone to want to look like Paris Hilton, and go back to their ding-dongs and their soap operas.
The women on this board are NOT the women I was describing. Just to make that clear.
Edited 7/27/2005 9:22 am ET ET by bostondivac
i think we (some of us) are the women you are describing, more than you think.
I think I have to disagree with you here, Jen. I find it gets tiresome to listen to people complain about the same problems over and over when they refuse to do anything about it. As an ex-social worker, I'm pretty well convinced that support or lack thereof isn't going to necessarily move someone into taking action. It's a personal decision to take action and you do it when you're ready - not because of things that other people say.
I am happy to support anyone that posts here with their weight loss and/or whining about lack of progress because I feel pretty confident that the people here work hard at making good decisions regarding health and exercise. We don't always make the healthiest decisions and that's the other thing I like about the people here - we can recognize and admit that it wasn't the healthiest choice and that whatever we did or didn't do was counterproductive to our goals. We accept it and move on.
It's the people that continually rationalize and justify their actions that get on my nerves. They say the defintion of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results. My definition of insanity is having to listen to someone complain about the same problems over and over without that person taking definitive action/trying something new/insert appropriate verb here.
i'm not saying everyone has to support someone if they are complaining about the same things over and over and not taking action, but that doesn't mean you have to bad mouth them either. you can either keep quiet and ignore them, or discuss the issue in a polite, respectful way (i.e. not "i hate people who won't get their butts off the couch and stop eating crap"). i specifically made a point to affirm that i have no problem with the CONTENT of Chrissy's criticism, but with the tone. for instance, you managed to make the exact same point without being mean about it: "I find it gets tiresome to listen to people complain about the same problems over and over when they refuse to do anything about it." i agree with you, and i have no problem whatsoever with you making that comment in that manner.
by the way, the same is true for repeated complaints about complainers - it's no less insane to repeatedly listen to people complain about other people but take no action (preferably to just ignore them) than it is to repeatedly listen to people complain about their
I understand what you're saying, but I think Chrissy was wanting to vent to people who understand (Chrissy - please correct me if I'm wrong). My articulation changes dramatically when I'm frustrated or irritated than when I'm calmly trying to make a point. In my eyes, that's the point of venting - you can voice your frustrations and get it out of your system. I may have missed the boat on this one, but I don't remember any other posts from Chrissy regarding this particular group of women.
Everyone is entitled to an opinion and in a perfect world, we'd all state our points in a calm, rational and articulate manner. But that isn't the way the world works - in real life OR here. I honestly don't feel that Chrissy said anything that offensive... From what I can tell, she was venting to a group of people who undoubtedly understand as I think we all have people in our lives who complain about weight/size/appearance/whatever and refuse to do anything to rectify the situation.
If someone here isn't supportive of my plastic surgery, that's completely fine with me. (In fact, I just spoke with a friend last night who wasn't very supportive of my surgery.) It's the way life is. If all of you came down on me for it, then I probably would not feel welcome here. But one person not liking my decisions and voicing that either here or another board is just not a big deal.
I also think there lies the difference between starting a legitimate discussion ("I respectfully disagree with you and here's why...") and just being able to vent frustation with ourselves, situations or other people.
No, you and Jean are right. My assumption is that since most of us are the GYM RATS board, that generally implies that we take care of ourselves 90% of the time. I mean, I eat junk food on occasion just like everyone else HOWEVER I realize the damage that sort of food can cause and so I 1.) don't eat it a lot, 2.) eat plenty of things that are good for me and 3.) exercise regularly. I'm assuming that the majority of us on this board follow a similar lifestyle. And those who come here seeking geniune help are again NOT the girls I am talking about. I find it very frustrating to constantly hear someone whine about something and then never bother to do anything about it, even when plenty of opportunities for change are given.
I thought I could avoid the drama from the 20-something board by just staying here, but I guess that's not really the case. I'm seriously done with IVillage. Maybe I'm only 24, but I sure as hell have better things to do with my time than deal with catty 7th grade b.s. Peace out, and happy gym-ratting.
No, I didn't make my goal last week. I made it all the way until Thursday when dd's practice ran late and we were too hungry to wait around for me to cook. So we ate out, and then we ate out the rest of the weekend because we were out and about with Veggie Tales concert, dance camp recital, and a date.
I was doing good on exercise, but now it looks like it is all over because of bedrest. Urgh! Good bye cute booty and nice thighs.
Paula
I think I know where you were going, and I know you weren't talking about me. But sometimes a pregnant womans mind takes everything personal :P
Paula
Jean,
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