My running dilemma
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| Mon, 08-22-2005 - 6:44pm |
Most of you are familiar with my love/hate relationship with running. Thanks to Jean's idea, I did the couch to 5K program last spring and actually ran an 8K in May. When I scheduled my surgery, I started to run less and less and then just stopped altogether (plus, it got really hot here and I had to practically get up in the middle of the night to run and I just didn't have the desire to do that).
So, I'm almost two months post-op and getting much stronger. I made it through a killer step class on Friday and I'm about to do another step class tonight. I can tell my CV capacity is improving and my muscles are definitely coming back. I wouldn't yet say I'm 100% yet because I'm trying to force myself not to do too much too soon (which is hard for me because I am way too ambitious and competitive with myself).
Pre-surgery, I really had designs on running a half-marathon in January. After surgery, I promised myself that I'd need to make a decision by September because I'd probably need to start training in September. I had kind of sort of decided that I didn't really want to start running again. And then, a friend from the gym (another trainer) said she was going to run the half-marathon this year (we walked it together last year). My competitive streak arose and I immediately thought "I want to run it too." Blah. :P
Running kicks my butt and even though I proved I could physically run an 8K, I'm just not sure if I want to put my body through that. Running really wiped me out, my knees were achey a lot, and it didn't leave me a lot of energy for other things (it really forced me to prioritize because I just couldn't do all my regular stuff AND run). BUT, I did love the sense of accomplishment knowing that I'd done something that I hadn't previously been able to do.
So, I'm kind of at a crossroads here and I think I need to decide what's more important. I would love to be able to say that I ran a half-marathon (and I honestly think I'd just do it once ~ it's the sort of thing I could do once and be satisfied) but I just don't know that I'm ready to commit to the training involved. I have no problem committing to exercise 5 days a week, but these runs would definitely be time consuming. On top of that, we're going to LA in September, Missouri in October, and our cruise is in December. I think I'd have to train while I was out of town and that could get difficult.
I think I'm talking myself out of it.. what do you all think? :)

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i know you already decided but just to back up your decision more... i know i'm the oddball on this among gym rats, but personally don't see why it would be so much better to be able to say that you ran a half marathon than to say you walked a half marathon (which you already did) - i mean, it's not like you are going to be one of the faster people running it no matter what you do between now and january, so is it really that much better to be #350 across the finish line as opposed to #450? if the main motivation is to just be able to say you did it, i don't think that's any motivation at all. there are a lot of things you or i COULD do that we don't do for various reasons. i COULD train myself to climb mount everest, i have no doubt that i could. but do i want to dedicate years of my life, tens of thousands of dollars, and risk my life for it? no way. and even if i made it up mount everest on a guided trip, there'd be other people who could say that they did it without supplemental oxygen or without fixed ropes or whatever.
i'm not sure why, but for some reason, running is one of those things that brings out the competition in a lot of people. but really, there is no more reason to do it "just for the sake of saying you did it" than there is wrestling an alligator just for the sake of saying you did it (alligator abuse aside).
but that's just me -
I totally hear what you're saying and I absolutely agree with you. It's weird how we arbitrarily decide when to be competitive.
I think for me, the running thing was because I struggled with it for such a long time. I felt like I was denied admission to this super-cool club and my stubborness motivated me to do the 5K program. (Yes, that's lame. I know. :) In my head, I think that I thought of the half marathon as the peak of my training and if I did that, I could honestly say I conquered running. (And why, you ask, wouldn't running an 8K be conquering running? I don't know. It's a good question.)
I also think that in my case, I am competitive about physical things because I spent so much of my life shunning all things involving sweating and breathing hard. So now that I can do those things, I want to be really good at them. Being good at physical things helps me appreciate how far I've come health and ability-wise.
But no, I don't want to have the cleanest toilet and if I started to sing, the alligator that I'm not going to wrestle would probably swim away really really fast. :)
There's a difference, at least for me, in knowing I did something, like running a half-marathon and being competitive.
I still think it's great that you did an 8k.
You're right... there will always be longer distances. That's a good way of looking at it. And yes... I suppose I am impressed with myself for doing an 8K, but that brings something else to my attention. I work and work and work to reach this goal or that goal and the minute I get there, I spend approximately 5 seconds being proud that I did it and then I'm setting the next goal already. I don't think I enjoy my "time at the top" enough. There I go again... always pushing to do better.
*grabbing stomach* That many hot dogs is just too many to think about. I have a hard enough time eating one hot dog. :P
i think i used to feel that way somewhat but i changed my attitude when i passed the bar exam. after that, "challenge" for the sake of challenge lost its mystique for me. as you say, it's all about training. you could walk 20 miles without training or you could run 20 miles with training. the training would require time, possibly money or other sacrifices, and perhaps that's what makes it a "challenge"? but it really isn't a challenge, it's just a sacrifice. it isn't really a challenge to run a marathon or an ultra marathon or climb mount everest. any of us could do those things with training.
for some people, i guess, the question of whether they could make the sacrifices necessary to complete the training is what makes it challenging. but i don't have that question. i have no doubt that if i chose to, i could do it.
I'd want the challenge without working for it!
At that rate, you'll be running ultra-marathons soon!
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