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Jess's Journal
| Wed, 07-19-2006 - 6:02pm |
Just to get it started. Red plan, no lites.
7/5, joined up. 253.6 lbs.
7/10, meal plan day. 251.4 lbs.
7/12, first official weigh in. 249.6 lbs. Total loss 4 lbs.
7/19, second official weigh in. 245.8 lbs. Total loss 7.8 lbs.
I had no (official) questions, and she had absolutely nothing to say about my food journal. (Because it's all there, no cheats.)
Now, just gotta do that 39 more times!
--Jess

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wow, jess, you've really set a high bar there -- losing so much each goal date. but if anyone can do it, you *can*!!
well, enjoy that night out with tall guy #1 (or is he #2 or #3)? :-) it's nice to have options, isn't it? and i am glad you have so many possibilities here. invest your time in getting to know each guy, then you will know which is the best pick for you!
it has been *sooo* long since i was dating (married 10 years here!), so it's difficult to imagine. but i recall it can be a tough choice when more than one guy seems to be "right" for you. best with all that!
--mel
mel
I know, it's aggressive, but I'd rather set an aggressive goal and not meet it fully than set an "ehhh" goal and meet it. I'd be much prouder of myself to have gotten ANYTHING accomplished--luckily, I don't think I'll really feel that sense of failure if I don't make it. (I honestly don't think I'll get there at this rate, but the past three months of historically fast weight loss weeks following historically slow ones is on my side! Maybe!)
I'd be happy with 192 by Christmas, period. But I want 189!!!!!!! (*maniacal laughter*)
Tonight is date night! Not sure what I'm going to wear. I want to be comfortable and confident and I want to look good. So I have to pick something that I feel confident in, something I'm not going to worry about riding up, falling down, needing to be tugged, etc. I'm wearing new Old Navy jeans to work today and they're pretty cute, so i might wear them on the date. Don't know! Just hoping he's as nice, funny, smart, and engaging in person as he is on email and the phone. And I hope I don't disappoint him either!
My self-confidence has really improved, I must say. From the responses I was getting on Yahoo, I'm not a bad looking person. I always thought i was, but that's from years of being overweight after years of having really bad skin after years of being teased mercilessly by kids on the bus. So, finally, I'm in a spot where I'm not only NOT getting teased, but I'm looking good and other people are noticing. And instead of worrying about what HE is going to think of ME on a first date, I'm worried about the date just going well and being fun. It's a nice place to be.
And if he's a dud, there are a few others. Some have already dropped out of the race, which the Online Daters here on iVillage call "ghosting", and that's fine. That's why you load up with a few at once.
And I'm also very happy by myself, so if nothing happens, that's okay, too.
(But I have my hopes up!)
Jess
jess,
sounds like you are in a great place with yourself.
I think I DID read that book! A few years ago, I went through a really crappy breakup with someone I was SURE that I was going to marry. It took a long time for me to feel right about myself just to get through the day; now I feel right about myself to sustain me through the end of my days. It's a nice feeling, for sure.
Jess,
Hehe. I'll think of you guys all standing behind, secretly rooting for me to keep smiling, keep having fun, keep thinking positively. :)
We do definitely have stuff in common, and we definitely have things that are not in common. What I think is cool is that we think mostly alike, have similar expectations of the world, but have different ways of operating within that world and those expectations, if that makes any sense. Like, we think the same stuff, but he really thinks about it, and I go more on instinct and intuition. But we get the same result. And we like similar enough stuff that it's not a mismatch in the least. I think it'll be fine as long as the chemistry is there in person!
Hope you have a great time on the date! Can't wait to hear how it goes. And you have such a good attitude about the whole thing. We *are* all rooting for you!
My friend once told me I was too picky. When I mentioned this, someone else told me "You are a princess, and you deserve to wait for your prince!" Those words kept me going, passing up guy after guy, until I met my husband. YOU are a princess too! And you deserve nothing less than a Prince! So make this guy sweat ya :)
Jacqui
Well...
I had a good time. He's a nice guy, he's really tall, he's funny, he's smart, he's attentive, he's cute. But I'm defective or something, because at the end of the date, I felt like he was invading my personal space, and I balked at the kiss that was obviously on its way, opting to get out of the car and finish the date standing outside his car, shouting in to him. I declined his offer to go get something to eat (at 10:30 at night?), and then I declined his request for a lunch date on Sunday (I'm really busy!). In the end, it's not that I'm not interested, it's that my birth control pill has really reduced my drive and motivations to get new relationships started, even with perfectly viable candidates. That, plus some anxieties I have about that first kiss and everything, and I'm not making it easy on the poor guy. His face fell and he started backpedalling when I declined everything, and I feel rotten. I emailed him a really apologetic and submissively-posed email to explain why I popped his balloons at the end of the night.
Okay, not quite the update you were all looking for, I know, but that's me. :)
I'd like to see him again and see if something kindles from that, but that's ultimately up to him now, I think.
Jess
(On a brighter note, my weight is on a downward trend today, one that makes me believe in Christmas miracles. HA! Just kidding. Anyway, I was 197.0 this AM, then 196.6 this afternoon, then 195.8 after the gym! Yes, yes, the post-gym weigh in was all water loss, but hey, 195 on the scale looked pretty good!)
You just didn't hand it to him on a platter...nothing wrong with making him sweat a bit. ;-) lol...if "it" is there, it will bloom.(At any rate, he knows you're not desperate, lol.) If not, you have the right attitude & rest assured, the right guy WILL come along for you! Hope if you go on a second date, it'll be more what you are looking for. You're doing great, though! Have a great day!
kimmi
ps.--awesome about your weight loss, way to go!
Hugs from Kimmi
I agree with Kimmi, it shows you're not desperate for someone. And hey, it's ok to like someone but not want to be romantically involved with them. Most of the guys we meet fall into this category. And thank goodness he wasn't a total shmuck or something, because you were able to go out, have an enjoyable time, and the next date will become more natural. For me, it seemed the older I got the harder it was to "date".
And I'm lovin' the numbers on your scale! You'll definitely be at 189 by Christmas!
Jacqui
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