Please Help

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-06-2005
Please Help
3
Tue, 09-06-2005 - 6:00pm

Hello everyone!

I have been looking for a place to receive advice and support online, and having visited ivillage some time ago, I thought this would be a great place to seek help.

I have a 'dilemma' that I need some help with. Over the last year or so, I have gained a pretty significant amount of weight, approximately 20 pounds or so. I am currently at my heaviest weight ever. While I definitely don't fit the clothes I wore a year ago, my main concern is the way I feel. For example, my energy level is not what I'd like it to be, and I know by changing my eating habits and lifestyle, I would feel a whole lot better. I was just wondering, from experiences and successes that any of you have had, what suggestions do you have for me to get started? I've tried several different things (Body for Life, which was great, while I stuck to it, Atkins, etc), and I have probably read every book on the subject. I just have troubles staying motivated for long periods of time, despite the fact that I KNOW that I need to do something about this a.s.a.p.

My boyfriend has also put on quite a bit of weight in the last year, more than I have, which has me growing more and more concerned, healthwise. I can make suggestions to him all I want, but I want to be able to practice what I preach, and help him, while also helping myself. We're a bad couple when it comes to sticking with things, and becoming more active, and eating healthier is something that we both need.

Basically, I was wondering what type of activities would you suggest? And how can we help motivate each other? Also, I don't know if my boyfriend realizes that his health/weight has me concerned, and I don't want to make him uncomfortable or angry by bringing it up, even though it needs to be addressed. Has anyone been in this situation, and how can I have that conversation, without seeming like I'm attacking him? All I want is for us to be healthy, and support each other while we reach that goal. Any thoughts or advice would be greatly appreciated. Thanks a lot.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2003
In reply to: jen_2424
Tue, 09-06-2005 - 8:53pm

Hi and Welcome.


Only you BF can decided for himself if he really want to get healthy, but if you start maybe he'll follow your lead.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-18-1998
In reply to: jen_2424
Wed, 09-07-2005 - 12:41am

Hi and welcome!
All I can tell you is my experiences, I have been the chubby kid my whole life and have tried a bunch of stuff in the past to lose it, you know what is working? Diet and exercise of all things! lol For me I had/have a significant amount to lose so I felt I really had to go cold turkey for while, that means I dont' buy junk food anymore, I don't even go down that aisle at the grocery store. Also I made a plan and a commitment, My plan cosists of No junk food, I do buy sherbert or bryers low fat ice cream for the kids but I just get a kind that I am not particularily fond of. Cutting back on carbs I would have had bread for every meal before, Now I have it only once a day. I started making smoothies or having meal bars for breakfast, and NO eating after 8pm. No excuses about exercise either, I mean I go if it is cold, raining, I'm tired whatever no excuses. I had to force it the first few weeks but now(after 2.5months it seems natural most days and I even(although I hate to admit it) miss it the days I am unalbe to go(but dont' tell my dh that lol). I knew that i would have a problem with snacking I love chips so I bought a whole bunch of different flavored rice cakes, and decaf tea's(chai is my favorite) that seems to help for the most part. I looked back in my life and chose an exercise that I have always liked doing, for me it was biking because that was the only way I would be able to stick with it. I am still fighting urges and I dont' know if that will ever go away but I have managed to curb my fast food addiction. I honeslty think I am a food addict and I have to take it one meal and one moment at a time some days. I fight through cravings daily. When I first started this journey june 1 2005 I weighed 214 and it was a struggle just to bike 3 miles but now 2.5 months later I am 190 and at least 2 clothing sizes smaller and I bike 12 + a day 5-6 days a week. It is kind of tough to get started sometimes but this is a great board for support and help. hth Glad you've joined us.

wendy
amaya 09/17/03
rowen 09/14/01

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-06-2005
In reply to: jen_2424
Wed, 09-07-2005 - 5:50pm
Thank you so much for your advice. I have realized that it is time that I get my priorities in order, and my health and self-esteem should be right up there at the top. I am really glad that there are helpful and supportive people, such as yourselves whose advice makes things so much easier. I know, from past experience, that this type of a lifestyle change takes a bit of getting used to, but after it becomes a routine, which I look forward to enjoying. As for my boyfriend, we had a talk yesterday, and I told him that I would like to make some changes, healthwise, and would really be appreciative if he joined me, so I don't have to do it alone, and to my surprise, he was more than willing to cooperate (let's just hope he sticks with it!). We are going to start with 45 minute nightly walks with the dog, and be aware of what types of food we are eating. Then we will take it from there. I have found reasons to be (and stay) motivated here. Thank you so much for your help!