TINY TUESDAY (m)

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Registered: 03-25-2003
TINY TUESDAY (m)
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Tue, 12-11-2001 - 9:57am

TINY TUESDAY (m)


With the holiday season in full swing, this week write a short story or scene that tells about a special gift given or received during Hanukkah, Christmas or Kwanza.

Happy Writing,

Mac

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Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 12-12-2001 - 10:13am

This is great


I loved the part where Patrick mistakes John Prine for John Lennon. Very clever and humorous. I guess I'm also partial to this as I'm part Irish.

Great work!

Michelle

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Avatar for tankaray
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Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 12-12-2001 - 10:18am

Awww.. I liked it!


I thought the ending was sweet! :-) The dialogue and characters were vivid and realistic.

Great stuff as usual!

Michelle

Michelle, co-cl for The Writing Life
Life is short. Buy the shoes.
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anonymous user
Wed, 12-12-2001 - 11:44am

Awww, you guys are so supportive! (nt)


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anonymous user
Wed, 12-12-2001 - 12:59pm

My favourite part was... (m)


"I nearly dropped my teeth..." And this was also a great line: "She looked down at the ball like it was covered in crap and sprouting worms."

You have a gift, my dear Mrs. Scrooge. (Just when exactly did Ebenezer marry?)

Cheers, Eyewrite

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anonymous user
Wed, 12-12-2001 - 2:00pm

Not Proud? ...(m)


Tsk, tsk. Honey, you made your goal with a sweet and wonderful piece. (I was confused as to who the narrator was at first, but I caught on towards the end. You'll just rewrite, right?) You have every reason to be proud. It takes a lot to write something from the heart, and then to share it? You did okay, Sammi

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anonymous user
Wed, 12-12-2001 - 2:13pm

Nice, Mac...(m)


I liked this, esp. the part about the dead drunk in the tub and the nephew discovered why Mikey could snag so many women. (Didn't we discuss 'size' awhile back here on the SSB? LOL)

I had to reread the part where the narrator is remembering Mikey and his abuses for the past twelve years. You used 'he' here, then in the next paragraph about Frank, you used 'he' again. Confused me just for a moment. Good work, Sammi

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anonymous user
Wed, 12-12-2001 - 2:21pm

Bah-Humbug, Indeed! ...(m)


But you shared a message very important. Billy gave from the heart to a kid he felt needed it. He learned the lesson his mother wanted him to learn rather nicely. Oh, and good story, too, Linda. Thanks for sharing this, Sammi

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anonymous user
Wed, 12-12-2001 - 7:34pm

Tsks taken... (m)


Thanks for your feedback, Sammi. This one was much better than my previous attempts yesterday. I didn't spend a lot of time fussing with it once I got it done because I was feeling "whew, finally, now hurry and post it!"

This group is truly supportive. Thank you so much, all!

Eyewrite

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Wed, 12-12-2001 - 10:29pm

Loved it, eyewrite (m)


Especially loved your way of "showing" such as using "...gloved, green-clad creature..." verses the boring old doctor. And I had a chuckle over "mean cats". God knows I love my kitties but they're either mean or crazy.

Enjoyed your TT,

Mac

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Wed, 12-12-2001 - 10:38pm

What a sweet lesson! (m)


We all need to think of Billy and practice his act this holiday season.

I agree with the idea of your story. These days, kids have so many fancy toys but like you so elegantly point out the simplest of life’s pleasure is what they want.

Thanks for the reminding us of what the season is all about.

Mac