Osmama said that she attends Women for Sobriety.
I only just this this! Sorry for the delay in adding my thoughts!
I was sitting and contemplating what I was going to say about WFS when my dd,7, came to me with our group list of names and numbers and asked if the group was going to be upset that I wasn't going to be at our meeting next Saturday since we are going to the Grand Canyon with my parents for the weekend. I said that no, they weren't upset and she said "But I thought they liked you to come to the meetings" to which I replied "Yes, they do, but they're happy that we get to see Grandma and Grandpa even though they'll miss me."
I think that in some ways that sums up what WFS had done for me. It has given me a wonderful group of women to share my life with and has shown my dd the love and support I receive from them.
In March 2005 I got really drunk and challenged several guys who were at my house to Light Saber (plastic) fights. I was very aggressive and obnoxious but of course thought I was being fun and playful. I requestd to be spanked with the light sabers and due to the power and aggression I was fighting with ended up getting my finger whacked so hard that I ended up losing a finger nail. I woke the next morning with my butt, hips and thighs covered with bruises. My butt was literaly black. Completely. I was so ashamed. I quit drinking for 10 weeks and then decided that I would try to moderate. Uh huh. Within 2 months of "moderating" I was drinking more heavily than ever. In my 10 weeks of not drinking I heard about WFS and wrote for info on local meetings. I received a letter from the moderator and proceeded to tuck the letter in a box under my bed only to be pulled out again in March 2006 when I decided that this had to stop.
I went to my first meeting and have been back every week since.
I know that I would not be sitting here with the sobriety I have had I not found this group. The WFS' "New Life Program" (see below) has given me back my own power. It has increased my sense of self and convinced me that I *am* a competant woman and that I *can* create any life I choose for myself. I have grown so much in the last 4-5 months and am proud of the woman I am. I no longer walk with guilt and shame over my past decisions and walk with my head held high with a newfound inner power.
I love going to my meetings and sharing with the other women there. I was surprised to find that I was significantly younger than the others but love the "motherly" support I receive. And the respect I receive, too. They don't see a 31 yo newly sober woman, they see a competent woman who has much to give. Very empowering!
In our meetings we share "strokes"; those things we did during the week that we may not have done in our drinking days or problems we handled sober that would have spun out while drinking. It helps to remind me how far I have come and allow me to feel such gratitude for this new life, for that truly is what I have found.
My dd now does not need to keep her mama's secret about bottles under the bed and I see such a change in her! She is my driving force. She is a bright, loving, beautiful girl and I was taking some of that away from her. My new choices and my association with WFS has given me a whole new start to creating a happy, productive life for my little Peanut.
So, in a nutshell, what has WFS given me? Me. :-)
Thank you so much for asking, Beth! I feel so warm and fuzzy and full of love now! LOL
"NEW LIFE" ACCEPTANCE PROGRAM (From www.womenforsobriety.org)
1. I have a life-threatening problem that once had me.
I now take charge of my life. I accept the responsibility.
2. Negative thoughts destroy only myself.
My first conscious act must be to remove negativity from my life.
3. Happiness is a habit I will develop.
Happiness is created, not waited for.
4. Problems bother me only to the degree I permit them to.
I now better understand my problems and do not permit problems to overwhelm me.
5. I am what I think.
I am a capable, competent, caring, compassionate woman.
6. Life can be ordinary or it can be great.
Greatness is mine by a conscious effort.
7. Love can change the course of my world.
Caring becomes all important.
8. The fundamental object of life is emotional and spiritual growth.
Daily I put my life into a proper order, knowing which are the priorities.
9. The past is gone forever.
No longer will I be victimized by the past, I am a new person.
10. All love given returns.
I will learn to know that others love me.
11. Enthusiasm is my daily exercise.
I treasure all moments of my new life.
12. I am a competent woman and have much to give life.
This is what I am and I shall know it always.
13. I am responsible for myself and for my actions.
I am in charge of my mind, my thoughts, and my life.
(c) 1976, 1987, 1993
Edited 8/6/2006 2:30 pm ET by osmama99
Thank you so much for the information. Do you mind if I use the strategies as posting ideas?
I hope not...cause I plan to!!! LOL
Mind?! However the message gets out there, get it out there! :-)
What I love about the 13 statements is that they can apply to any person for any reason. Substitute #1 for *any* habit, addiction or behavior that is hurting you or holding you back and you've still got a recipe for a new life.
WFS is a wonderful program. Journaling., reading and working on yourself.There is a lot of reading material on their site
Wish we had meetings here but the only thing somewhat close is SOS have not checked into that., has anyone else?
Enjoying being Sober.Thea(tia)
I know this is a rather dated thread, but I just today read it...
I actually participate in both AA and WFS and get a great deal out of each program.
I personally find the personal empowerment and esteem rebuilding of WFS to be extremely helpful. However WFS is not nearly as available as AA is and there is great benefit to be surrounded by happy sober people.
I do get frustrated with some of the AA-ers who believe that AA is the only way to sobriety and if you follow any other program, you are still "in denial". That simply is not truth.
Both programs have much to offer people desiring a happily abstinent life.
Ladies, check it out if you haven't heard of it before.
I havent seen you here before so welcome to the Alcohol Problems board.
My pleasure. Life is much better when I actually experience it with all my senses intact.
I have only sporadically read on this board, but will return.
I do love AA and go to at least one meeting a week, but I personally don't get the spriritual relief that many get and appreciate the personal empowerment aspects of WFS.
The AA groups I've been to pay "lip service" to the concept of more than one way to sobriety but most AA-ers don't sincerely believe it. But for me, it's whatever works for the individual. In fact, if one looks at the REAL numbers, most people with drinking issues sober up successfully without any programs.
Isn't it great there ARE many options available?
To your health!
You don't realize it but you are demonstrating one of WFS's statements in your signature line about happiness. WFS believes that "Happiness is a habit I will develop." Happiness is our own responsibility; a personal behavior choice. NOT dependant on circumstances. THAT concept has revolutionized the way this gal thinks. Been a huge life-altering "aha" moment for this alcoholic.
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