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| Mon, 08-14-2006 - 11:00am |
Hello. I frequently post to other boards here, however I am new to this one. I would like some advice and opinions on how to go about quitting alcohol. I need to give everyone a little background first. I am a child of an alcoholic and have a family full of alcoholics, however the people who raised me - my mom & grandparents - never drank around me that I can remember. We do have a picture of me at age 2 or 3 holding a bottle of beer and staggering around, and I began binge drinking around age 12. Around four years ago my marriage began to fail and I began drinking every night. I divorced my husband and eventually met my fiance (we became engaged last week). We have been together 2 years. He is a child of an alcoholic who was occasionally abusive. My fiance works for beer distributing company which coincidentally sells the same brand of beer I'm holding in the picture mentioned above. He drinks every night but does not get incoherently intoxicated like I do. I seldom can begin drinking without getting completely drunk and blacking out. I even drink at home when I am away from him. I am about to call AA and join. The problem is he is expected to come to events at bars to promote the brand of beer he sells, he always has alcohol around, etc. How do I resist it? If his company/family/friends found out I was in AA it would be embarrassing. I'm considering lying and saying something like "my dr said if I don't stop I might die" just to keep from telling the truth. His ex wife is an alcoholic and I don't want to be like her. I also have a daughter who has seen me plastered and begs me to stop. I have no self esteem left, I've lost a great job, and have had to file bankruptcy. Help.

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Hi nikki
Welcome to the Alcohol Problems board.
Alcohol, A
HI Nikki,
"I am about to call AA and join." Do it. It's really all I can suggest you do. It's a lot. You don't owe anyone any explanations or apologies Nikki, you really don't. A simple, "No, thank you." from you is all they need. Once you get in AA and especially during our early days of recovery it is important for our peace of mind, I think, to avoid temptation and not be around alcohol if at all possible. At one time I worked for a major US Airline and served many travel agents and traffic offices of large corporations. The airline often hosted cocktail parties and even champagne breakfasts for these accounts. In my drinking days I was the first to arrive and last to leave but once in recovery I explained my situation to my supervisor. I was gracefully excused from attending these functions. My company was probably happy I was coming to work everyday. Things have a way of working out for us Nikki, but we must do our part. Goodluck to you and hang around here as an adjunct to AA for we are very supportive of one another. This is not a strictly AA board for all are welcome and there are many good ideas to be learned here, the important thing is we all care about one another. Not many places like that left on this planet we call Earth anymore, is there?
Pray for peace,
Stay safe,
Service in recovery,
Paul
Castaway
A Friend in Recovery
Paul
This reply is for Brenda and Paul. Thank you both for your responses. I've called the local AA and am scheduled to attend a meeting this evening. My stomach is in knots just thinking about it. I know AA has helped many people. The man who gave me directions to the meeting said that AA saved his life and he also wished me luck.
I know it is very important to stay away from temptation, and it is easy when I'm at home. When I visit my fiance it is another story. I'm up against a heck of a challenge. I failed to mention that his mother owns her own bar. So, he works for the biggest beer distributor in the country, alcohol is always present, his mom owns a bar, our friends work for the second biggest beer distributor in the country, another friend owns his own liquor store....... I am literally immersed in a culture of drinking. Hopefully I can learn how to say no.
He also fell in love with "Fun Nikki". I'm afraid now I won't be so fun. Most of our fights occur when I'm drunk. I've lashed out and hit him, punched through windows, rammed his truck with my car, and so many other things I'm ashamed of with absolutely no memory of having done them. I have become violent just like his dad did. His father committed suicide after downing a bottle of tequila. Maybe the fact that I will no longer be "Psycho Nikki" will make up for not being "Fun Nikki". Pathetic.
I will definitely post here along with attending AA. Once again, thank you.
You sound about as much fun drunk as I was. The places I got thrown out of and banned from, well, let's just say I wouldn't be caught dead in them today.
I won't lie to you, for me, getting sober was no fun at all. Not a bit. But BEING sober, well, that is a blast. I have a good time, and I remember it.
Remember, say no, only one drink at a time. A great reason, if pushed, is that you have had enough already.
Let us know how the first meeting went....and make sure you get to another one.
Hi Nikki,
Who is to say you wont be fun sober?
Alcohol, A
Nope, you cannot chicken out, then we would have Chickie and Chicken posting, and I would not be able to deal with that. NO NO NO, don't do that to me! Please, I am begging....I already am overstressed.
LOL
Excuse me, I am a tad touched at the moment.
Good luck...you can do this.
Keep coming back here - let us know how we can help you!
Leslie
I dumped my still drinking lover of 5 years
so I could save my sanity.
We no longer shared the same goals or interest.
I was no longer a slave to alcohol and he was.
I became sick of the alcoholic odor he carried.
We both survived ... I thrived in sobriety!
Take care of YOU and your health.
Unchecked alcoholism is progressive and fatal.
Good luck...the future is yours.
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