Sunday’s Surprise: Open The Envelope (m)

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Sunday’s Surprise: Open The Envelope (m)
9
Sun, 02-17-2002 - 11:22am

Sunday’s Surprise: Open The Envelope (m)


During our chat this past Wednesday night, Jade suggested we do an exercise on “show vs tell.” So this week, go back and select one of your Tiny Tuesday exercises from the past. Circle (or highlight) any area of the story where you told what happened, and then rewrite it using the “show” rule.

Here’s an example CL-Ozarker provided during our chat:

“I can tell the reader that John went into the bank and withdrew $50,000 dollars or I can show them by saying, John strode through the bank doors, pulled out his Glock.40, and yelled, "Everyone on the floor." before he dashed out with $50,000."

Happy writing,

Mac

PS…If you want to post a link to the original version (for comparison purposes), feel free to do so but don’t feel obligated.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Wed, 02-20-2002 - 10:29pm

Great the 1st time, better the 2nd! Great job, Jade! (nt)


Avatar for jadetigerroses
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-01-2003
Thu, 02-21-2002 - 9:50am

Mac...


Thanks for reading it. I figured I had better do since you used my name. heeheheh

Thanks again

Jade

Have a mystical day,

Jade

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