TINY TUESDAY...(m)

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Registered: 12-31-1969
TINY TUESDAY...(m)
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Mon, 02-18-2002 - 9:50pm

TINY TUESDAY...(m)


I would like to try something just for fun and to go along with something we discussed last week in chat about dialog and its uses in the 'show versus telling' of a story. So, here's this weeks Tiny Tuesday: Write a short piece using strictly dialog to show all aspects of the story, especially action. Have fun with this, Sammi

P.S. I will be gone for the next two or three days, so I will post mine and respond to others then. Sorry about this inconvenience.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
In reply to:
Tue, 02-19-2002 - 10:43pm

How sweet, a baby girl!!! (m)


Your dialogue really showed a lot. The way Grandpa commented on Grandma’s pacing let us know how nervous she was. Also the way the nurse made them listen outside the delivery room was very vivid.

Great job, Sammi, and thanks for the exercise.

Mac

PS…I loved how the Joe was impressed with her “middle figure salute” – LOL. Me too!

Visitor (not verified)
anonymous user
In reply to:
Tue, 02-19-2002 - 10:58pm

Yahoo, pink for you...


Oh this was funny, Sammi. Was there a tape recorder in your husband's shirt pocket or do you have a really good memory? You captured the anxiety and how the personalities grate on each other. Hard Rock T-shirt on the barely-out-of-pubescence doctor, was he Doogie Howser? Lol.

I'll bet you cuddle up with your little one and share this story with her many, many times. :)

Have a good trip, Eyewrite

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2003
In reply to:
Wed, 02-20-2002 - 2:55am

Hot & Steamy


I gotta memorize some of those lines for my next squabble with my resident "rude" pest. This is was so much fun to read I hated for it to end.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2003
In reply to:
Wed, 02-20-2002 - 3:02am

I'm Impressed!


You did a terrific job describing labor and delivery using only dialogue. I would have said it couldn't be done, but I'll be darned if you didn't do it! I'm impressed!

Patty

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Registered: 03-28-2003
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Wed, 02-20-2002 - 3:13am

Do You Know My Husband?


I've said exactly the same thing to my husband about not chewing and inhaling his food! Replace murders trials and the stock market for the cows and goats and that could have been the dinner table conversation at my house. Those two sound just like me and my husband.

Good job!

Patty

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2003
In reply to:
Wed, 02-20-2002 - 4:10am

Constipation


"Patty, are you ok in there?"

"No!"

"What's wrong?"

"Leave me alone!"

"I can't hear you through this door. Are you grunting?"

"I said leave me alone!"

"Do I need to call the doctor?"

"No!"

"You aren't in labor are you?"

"Leave me alone! Can't a person be unnnnhhh..."

"I'm calling the doctor, right now!"

"Damn it! I'm not in labor, I'm ahhhhh constipated!"

"What can I do? Can I get you something?"

"You can throw the rest of those bananas out and leave me alone!"

"Bananas? What are you talking about?"

"I ate unnhhhh, unnnhhh, 14 bananas today. I don't want to see another banana as long as I live!"

"Good grief! Why did you eat 14 bananas?"

"A girl in the waiting room at Dr. Pierce's office was bragging that Dr. Pierce was going to induce her labor tomorrow and she's only a week past due! It's not fair, I'm unnnhhh two uhnhhhh..."

"What in the world does that have to do with bananas?"

"You don't know anything. I ate bananas so I could have this baby."

"Patty, you're delusional. I'm calling the doctor if you don't unlock this door right now!"

"I'm not delusional and if you were as smart as you think you are you'd know that they induce labor with potassium and bananas have lots of unnnhhhh potassium."

"What are you laughing at? It's not funny!"

"Patty, it's not potassium -- it's pitocin. Labor is induced with pitocin: P-I-T-O-C-I-N."

Avatar for countrygal23
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Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to:
Wed, 02-20-2002 - 9:56am

Thanks (m)


Hey eyewrite, I liked that description of the farmer, kicking off the muck, So were you raised on a farm? Are you a farmers daughter?

I was raised in the city and married a farmer.

thanks for the feedback....Maria

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Avatar for countrygal23
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Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to:
Wed, 02-20-2002 - 10:01am

Thanks (m)


Yes, of course my hubby is sexy LOL And yes, this was an actual conversation, I just left out that when it comes to dessert, well sometimes, we...LOL

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Avatar for countrygal23
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to:
Wed, 02-20-2002 - 10:08am

Thanks (m)


Hey Mac, You're more than welcome to come over and have lunch with us!

As to how the hubby knows, in my case, I tell on myself,cause the house looks the same as when he left,like a tornado hit of course, I blame the kids.LOL I eventually get my cleaning done.

Maria

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Avatar for countrygal23
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to:
Wed, 02-20-2002 - 10:21am

Too funny (m)


I'm not saying that constipation is a laughing matter but what a hoot!!!

I had to be induced with each of my five births so I know pitocin well.LOl

Very enjoyable

Maria

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