What do you think of this?
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| Wed, 05-11-2005 - 6:43am |
I'm not sure if I like what Cassian's teacher did the other day or not, so I'm asking your opinion. We are working on tantruming behavior with Cassian and he gets stickers for not tantruming during the day at school. The main reasons he tantrums are when he is told "no" to something. He does this at home in about the same frequency, so I don't think the classroom is more stressful for him. In other respects, he is actually quite adaptable for an ASD child. During tantrums, Cassian makes eye contact, verbally expresses himself, kicks and tries to hit (although not with full force), and throws himself onto things (beanbags, etc.). He is actually much better than he used to be several years ago, when he was having full-blown meltdowns.
Anyway, Cassian's teacher tends to view his tantruming as attempts to manipulate her or me. I disagree with this philosophy because he has never gained anything from the tantrums and they are decreasing in intensity over time. Yesterday, his teacher told me she purposefully brought a book in for circle time that she did not want the children to handle. Now, Cassian's biggest obsession is books. He is hyperlexic, and we have probably never told him he could not look at a book using his own hands or at least with supervision. He has been made to wait for books, as on occasions in the library when the book he wants is checked out or when we order from Amazon.com or go looking for a particular book in bookstores. These times are hard, but he is learning to delay gratification.
Anyway, he had major meltdowns because he was forbidden to review the book after circle time, which is the normal procedure. I don't think the teacher even told him this procedure was going to change. Personally, I think this was too big a step for Cassian right now, and I would have preferred that she not bring that particular book in to share with the class, or alternatively she could have told me about the book, so that I could have made the decision whether to bring him to school that day. In another vein, would you bring a box of cookies in to a class full of hungry preschoolers, open the box, and then proceed to tell them that they could not have the cookies? This is what the situation must have been like for Cassian.
It's not that I don't want to expose Cassian to "no". We tell him "no" several times a day and put up with the tantrums that result. I guess the problem for me here is that books are supposed to be educational, and if a child shows an extraordinary talent for something like reading, I don't understand why you wouldn't work really hard to fulfill that need. My approach would have been to tell Cassian that he could not touch the book, but I would review it with him a set number of times. After that promise had been carried out, I would have felt like I treated him fairly, even if he did throw a tantrum.
So, tell me, am I off-base on this one, or was the situation handled poorly?
Suzi

so did she do this on purpose to test Cassian?? cause that's what it sounds like to me! THAT is just WRONG!!! first of all, all preschoolers need to have a change in proceedure spelled out to them in advance. Second, knowing that Cassian loves books and would want to review this one after circle time she should have esp explained the rules to him and even taken him and/or you aside and explained this before class even started! Third, why could she not have reviewed the book w/ him? sigh! what was she thinking? (this would have set off a tantrum from my NT kids! I know that both Martha and Amelia would have reacted similarly in such a situation.) What good did this do? If the book was so special that she didn't want anyone to view it except in circle time why would she bring it in?
ok, yes, I think you're right on in this situation!
Betsy
I think if she has a book she doesn't want the children to handle that's fine but she should have prepared Cassian ahead of time.
Samantha
I think the teacher was totally out of line. It sounds like she was setting him up for a tantrum.
When I taught preschool, I NEVER took in a book that I would not let the children handle. I took in some of my children's books on many occasions but I would set ground rules. I'd read the book to the children and then I would put it out on the table, along with other books that I had brought in because they would fight over the one book if there weren't other choices of "new" books.
I explained that these were my little boy's books and that books are special things. I asked them to keep the books at the table and 2 children could look at each book together, but they had to be gentle and share. Yes, some books got slightly damaged, but that is a chance you take.
My preschoolers were kids that missed the Kindergarted cutoff date, so most of them were 5 or nearly 5.
The NT children were rougher with the books than the AS little girl I had.
I believe that the rule of sharing also applies to the teacher. If she didn't want to share, she shouldn't have brought the book in.
OOOHHHH, that fires me up. I don't believe in with holding BOOKS from children.
I agree with you, Suzi. The situation was handled very poorly.
Crystal
Suzi,
I didn't read the other replies yet as I am on my way out but I wanted to say you are not off-base what so ever. That was extremely poor judgement by the teacher. I am actually wondering if she didn't do this specifically to push Cassians buttons knowing he would likely meltdown.
WHAT preschool teacher brings a cool new book to class she is not going to let the children check out and look at with at least supervision? Then don't bring the book at all! Cassian was completely set up for failure on this one because she KNOWS this is a big issue for him. Heck I never personally met the boy but just from my reading of him I could tell that would be huge for him.
Considering her feelings that he is "manipulating" you and her, I wouldn't doubt that she set him up on purpose. Just something to think about. Glad Cassian doesn't have long left in that class.
Renee