Awful IEP meeting
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Awful IEP meeting
| Fri, 06-03-2005 - 11:36am |
Well, that was the biggest waste of my time. I thought the school district would finally see there really is something wrong with my son with his diagnosis of PDD-NOS but no they still blew that and me off. I presented his psychiatry report from his psychiatrist and his play therapist (social worker) both worked together on getting to know him and diagnose him. They told me it must be all parentally hearsay and not behavioral and observation based. I presented his OT report that says he has major sensory problems and is fine motor delayed and they say that was parental hearsay only even though it had test scores on it all they looked at was the sensory profile that I will out and was attached. I presented another report from a behavioral psychologist that say that my son had been diagnosed by his psych with PDD-NOS and that he had sensory problems and CAPD and possibly a learning disability so he should be watched very closely for that and tested at the end of 1st grad for the LD. They said that was parentally hearsay report also. That basically I manipulated all these people into saying this about my son and that it wasn't really true. The drs/therapists either observed or evaluated my child and talked to me but I don't think any dr/therapist is going to diagnose PDD-NOS on the word of a parent only and I didn't even consider ASD until these people brought it up as a possible diagnosis and then I researched it. The school also totally ignored the fact that my 5 1/2yr old son is not even remotely potty trained. The told me he was playing me and they told me I had all summer to work on it and blew me off so I still don't know how the school is going to address this. Oh and apparently it isn't a big deal if my son walks the halls of the school with his pants undone because when I said he cannot fasten them they didn't pertain to his education. My son's advocate brought up the fact that I am seeing my 2yo catch up and surpass some of my 5yo's skills and they told me not to compare my children. I have 3 kids 1 older than my son with ASD and 1 younger I know how to raise kids and what is normal. I was told by the OT that was there that said he doesn't have sensory problems to put him on the bus so he will get input before school, this after I told them he is contact reactive to peanuts, I don't think that would be a smart idea. They told me no child can take as many meds or have as many problems as my son does so apparently I manipulate his other drs to, to bad my son is still miserable a lot of the time.
I was basically told there was nothing I can do until I send him to K to sink next yr and THEN they will have to do something for him. But I want to know how fair it is for him to have to suffer so they can say oh you were right. His advocate said he will sink and show what we said within the first 2 weeks of school. He does have an IEP ONLY because it was done in 2003 and I was told they only did that to ease MY anxiety and give ME a safety net that he didn't really need one, WHATEVER don't do anything to appease me period do it to help my son. It is a consultative IEP and he is going to get 15min of social worker observation in the classroom/month period. This IEP will only last until Nov as he will turn 6 and it is under developmental delay. So basically then he is SOL. If you have gotten this far thanks for reading I appreciate it as basically you guys are one of the only people that understand. Any questions or suggestions please feel free. It is going to be a crappy summer for me knowing I am throwing my son to the wolves in the fall after all the work we have done. Thanks again
Jenny and Noah 5yo PDD-NOS
I was basically told there was nothing I can do until I send him to K to sink next yr and THEN they will have to do something for him. But I want to know how fair it is for him to have to suffer so they can say oh you were right. His advocate said he will sink and show what we said within the first 2 weeks of school. He does have an IEP ONLY because it was done in 2003 and I was told they only did that to ease MY anxiety and give ME a safety net that he didn't really need one, WHATEVER don't do anything to appease me period do it to help my son. It is a consultative IEP and he is going to get 15min of social worker observation in the classroom/month period. This IEP will only last until Nov as he will turn 6 and it is under developmental delay. So basically then he is SOL. If you have gotten this far thanks for reading I appreciate it as basically you guys are one of the only people that understand. Any questions or suggestions please feel free. It is going to be a crappy summer for me knowing I am throwing my son to the wolves in the fall after all the work we have done. Thanks again
Jenny and Noah 5yo PDD-NOS

Dear Jenny,
Did you write this all over at the IEP Board here at iVillage? Steph and the other posters are so knowledgeable about what your legal options are at this point. This is Crazy!!! They are accusing you of not knowing your child, and manipulation of all these professionals? Wow, you must be some masterful manipulator, besides not having a clue about your own child.
I am so sorry, what an awful experience. I would think you might need to fight this, big time! Somehow. But we have never had a difficult moment at an IEP meeting, just good luck, really (NOT a good school district). AND we went private, which must be and is reimbursed because of lack of appropriate programming. So I cannot advise you exactly what the next thing is to do, but I'm sure you must fight somehow.
Good, good luck, and let us know how things go. And definitely take some cyber-wine and chocolate and a great heap of well-wishing from me.
Yours,
Sara & Malcolm, almost 8, PDD-NOS
I am so sorry for your son and you. We have a pretty good situation with my son, Cassian (5.5 PDDNOS, hyperlexia), but then he does look quite autistic when in a group and he has major emotional meltdowns over just about anything. Some of my friends who have kids with subtler problems are having difficulty getting services for next year (Kindergarten). Maybe, the school system has not dared to question me also because I am a psychologist and I am qualified to diagnose kids for EI. I know schools are different in other places.
I think you should definately seek advocacy assistance. Getting some behavioral tests done would also help your case. If the diagnoses of your son were based entirely on parent reports, this could be a legitimate complaint by the school officials, but they cannot say the same thing to behavioral assessments. Good luck.
Suzi
My son has had an advocate for the last 2 yrs to no avail. I am not sure what a behavioral assessment is but he has been evaluated by a child behavioral psychologist(every yr since he was 18m or so), a child psychiatrist and licensed clinical social worker( every other wk since the beginning of Dec). Of course they talk to me first BUT then they take him in another room for the rest of the session. I just don't understand what else needs to be done. I mean this is all the documentation they discredited. His tendencies come out as behavioral problems mostly, like overstimulation hyperactivity, he will either shut down totally or fight depending what is being asked of him and the situation if he is not comfortable in the enviroment. He doesn't understand social cues like say when another child doesn't want to play with him or wants to be left alone. So I guess I am just not sure what else I need to do. I have no problem getting things done if at all possible to help him. I would be estatic if he needed no help in K but the likelyhood of that with the problems he had in preK is unlikely. Thanks for any help.
Jenny and Noah(5.5yo)PDD-NOS