Worsening, now she won't even GO to bed

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-11-2004
Worsening, now she won't even GO to bed
3
Tue, 10-04-2005 - 1:58am

Instead of just waking up at 3am, now my daughter will not even go to sleep in the first place. I have absolutely no idea what is causing this sudden change! We are going to try having her see my family everyday, whom she is very attached to and see if that will help. The light vs dark doesn't seem to matter...when she wakes up in the middle of the night we move her to a room that is even more light than hers and she goes back to sleep there. However, she won't go to sleep there to begin with!

I did however finally get ahold of a Neuro Psyche for a possible eval....which could be as early as the beginning of November. This Dr (who called me back only 3 hours after I left my message) has two appointments in December, and possibly a cancellation in the beginning of November. I'm also still waiting on one more Neuro Psyche to call me back. Up until this point we were looking at no sooner than May 2006 for an appointment, so I will gladly wait until December!

She has also started to hit herself and us as well, and use her arms in tantrums...throwing them against walls, doors, ect. In addition to already biting herself, throwing herself into walls, ect....biting her sister. (Who now doesn't even want to play with her, she is terrified of her...even though she is bigger she refuses to hurt her sister back, she just yells for us.)

She actually hit me so hard tonight when I was trying to get her to bed that she gave me a bloody nose.

I do NOT understand where a kid that is not even 2 yet can be this difficult! I don't even allow people to raise their voices around my kids, so none of this could possibly be learned. They don't go to daycare, they are with me or my Mom all the time. I don't work, I stay home, and because of the kids immune system they are rarely around other kids. We do not spank them, or raise our voices with them. This is definitely not something coming from example.

I certainly hope that we can get into a Neuro Psyche soon, or I am afraid this is going to continue to escalate and she is going to hurt herself or someone else. She bites deep enough to draw blood, my biggest fear is that she is going to bite in the wrong place on herself or someone else and hit a vein or artery.

I do not understand, at all. I want answers so that we can help her, because nothing we are doing seems to be working!

Chelsae

www.aliandpeanut.com

www.upwithdowns.org


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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003

there are some similarities to your daughter and my son Matthew. last year at this time, life was hell. i remember a daytime tantrum he had where i had to take him to his room and stay there cause he was off the wall. he was so upset that he pulled my hair to his head and bit me hard on the forehead drawing blood. he was just over 2 at the time. never been around other kids to get the idea to do this. and sleep, i dreaded it every night for months. i was a zombie

we eventually went to a child psychiatrist who diagnosed him with severe regulatory disorder. he's been on risperdal and trileptal since. life has been much better. he sleeps well, he's happy and calm.

only you can determine the serverity of your daughter's situation. but there are striking resemblences and it took months before i considered and accepted that medicine might help. i remember crying to the ped about it. he actually suggested that i take him to the hospital so i could get some reprieve. what was he thinking!! i think he felt that i was just parenting him poorly, but that was not the case.

gl, valerie

~Valerie
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-16-2005
I wish I had some words of wisdom, I don't.
Just wanted to say I loked at the web sites and they are ADORABLE : )
gotta love little girls, I have 2 of them myself : _
Avatar for googolplex
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2003

Chelsae, (HUGS),

Wow. It sounds like you've really got your hands full. I typed out a response late last night, and at the last minute I realized that your daughter also has epilepsy. It suddenly became too complicated, and I had to get to bed. But now, I've got a few moments.

First of all...It sounds like she really needs to be evaluated by a neuro-psych or a developmental pediatrician soon. Who treats her for the epilespy? The regular ped?

Second...and remember I'm just a mom, this isn't medical advice...what you describe definately sounds like a neurological disorder and NOT merely testing boundaries or the usual little kid stuff. I feel like I can say with confidence that, from what you describe, she is NOT in control of her actions, and traditional discipline techniques will only frustrate her or make it worse. I say this because my child, who is now on Trileptal for "mood disorder-NOS" had similar symptoms. It wasn't exactly the same, but it was frightening. You say that you never raise your voice or your hand to your kids, and neither did I...but I'll tell you honestly that, especially when your child gets old enough that they ought to know better, it's real easy to snap. So, I'm glad to see that you are looking for medical/professional help now, before it gets to the point where you start believing maybe what she needs is a good whack or a good screaming at. Because people will tell you that.

This must be really scary and taxing for all of you.

I don't know how verbal your daughter is, but I'd guess not very, at 2. When she lashes out and bites or hits, does she seem totally wild, like a frightened animal, kind of? I hope that doesn't sound offensive; I'm just wondering, because I've seen this kind of thing in my own child. It's hard to be 100% sure, but we think he had been having some hallucinations, which is not uncommon in mood disorders. You might want to take a look at www.bpkids.org, and maybe even post on their general message board about some of this stuff she's been doing. Not to say that I think she has bp; I wouldn't know. But you may find some helpful info.

One other thing. I don't think you said what medication she takes for epilepsy. I know that some anti-convulsants that are used for seizures are also prescribed for mood disorders. Now, I have no idea how the two are related. If I were in your position I think I would ask the doctor about her epilepsy medication and whether it fits into this "mood stabilizer" category. Maybe the medication is affecting her in a bad way? (although if it is one of kinds that is useful as a mood stabilizer, that shouldn't be the case) Or maybe she has a co-morbid condition that could be taken care of simply by changing meds?

This is just really complicated. A good neuro-psych is what she needs, it sounds like. I hope I didn't completely confuse and/or depress you with all of my crazy ideas. Expect to have to fill out a lot of forms and give as much detailed info as you can to help the doctor with a diagnosis. He/she should talk to you without your daughter, and then observe, examine and talk to her. Also expect some blood tests.

Please keep us posted. Also, I say this all the time, but you might want to take a look at "Straight Talk About Psychiatric Medications for Kids" by Timothy Wilens, MD.

Evelyn