Perpetual state of "crabby"

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-13-2006
Perpetual state of "crabby"
7
Fri, 08-17-2007 - 8:59am

Lately I've been waking up every day in a foul mood. It starts with not getting enough sleep the night before. Then I wake up (unwillingly) to DH smothering me on MY side of the bed. I swear, sometimes I wish we had twin beds. Then it's the morning routine with needy children, rushing to get DS fed, dressed and teeth brushed (God forbid) before leaving for camp or school, etc. I feel like I'm ready to snap at anyone and anthing that gets in my way. The constant whining, complaining, arguing, back talk, sibling torment... it is really getting to me.

I know there are those of you who have it SO much worse than me right now. Reading all of your posts gives me some much needed perspective, but I just can't seem to shake this crabbiness. I've lost my sense of humor, my flexibility, my patience, my joy. There is so much to be grateful for, but I can't see it through the daily muck of life.

I need time to be alone. I need to start scrapbooking again. I need to eat better and take care of myself. Heck, as long as I'm dreaming I need a personal chef, a trainer and a maid.

I'm not a talker and the one friend I do talk to has been away for three weeks. Thanks for being my 'ears' today.

Melissa

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-26-2005
Fri, 08-17-2007 - 10:58am
Melissa,
I feel your pain! I find myself more and more losing the joy I found in being a mother to my kids and I'm starting to sound more and more like my mother everyday(LOL).My day feels like a constant back and forth to therapies, seperating Jake from his sister because he loves to hear her scream, making phone calls about the kids. The list goes on and on. Some days I wake up and it feels like I never went to bed, kinda like that movie Groundhog Day!I forget how old your kids are? I think or HOPE it's just like this because mine are so young and close in age.
Teresa
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-2006
Fri, 08-17-2007 - 1:46pm

Sweetie, you are in desperate need for a girls weekend. If you can't get that how bout talking the hubby into taking the kids somewhere for the weekend, like camping or to his familys house to visit?

I know that if I didn't have that occasional break, life would really suck lol. Even if tony takes the boys to his mothers house (she lives 3 hours away) and all I'm looking forward to is cleaning, then I love it. I turn really loud alternative music up and open the windows. I'll also play Queen, AcDc, Bad Co and tons of music from my youth too lol.

For some reason It lifts me up. It's kinda like therapy, just thinking to myself and not having any interruptions so I can at least finish what I started without distractions from the kids.

I hope you can find away to get that break :)

Lainie

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-25-2003
Fri, 08-17-2007 - 6:42pm

Melissa,


I am terrible for not going to bed on time and I am always exhausted in the mornings.

-Paula

visit my blog at www.onesickmother.com
Avatar for betz67
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Sat, 08-18-2007 - 4:16pm

(((HUGS))) try to grab just 15 minutes for a sanity break today-- I know I didn't do that often enough when my kids were younger and I would end up screaming at them. I have learned that I need a 15 min break during the day just like "working" people get. I often put a game in the computer or a favorite DVD for the younger kids and go have 15 min to read or make my older kids 'babysit' while I go to the grocery store by myself.

Betsy

Avatar for turtleemom
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-25-2007
Sat, 08-18-2007 - 11:02pm
I find that time alone does wonders for me. DH and DS will go out and spend some time together and then when they are back I am in a much better mood. I get up 5:30 to find the me time. Even if it is unloading the dishwasher, and throwing in laundry and then curling up to read it is a nice and quiet way to start the day. Something else I found is that I schedule in time to do something that I do enjoy with DS to remember the positive parts of being a mom. Heather

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-13-2006
Sun, 08-19-2007 - 3:29pm

Thank you all for your responses. I know it is critical that I begin to take care of myself. Paula, you asked when the last time was that I had a physical... HA! I loathe going to the doctor and I believe the last physical I had was just before I was married... 14 years ago! I am embarrassed to write that. And therapy... HA! You guys are as close to therapy as I'll get. As I said, I'm not a talker and the idea of spilling my guts to a total stranger sends waves of nausea. (Once again last night I was contemplating joining chat, but chickened out. I'm just no good at small talk.)

What will I do then? This is what I've come up with so far. 1) Join a morning Bible study group that meets once a week and has free child care. 2) Get back on the music team at my church. This is something I did for a long time before life got too crazy. It feeds a part of me that nothing else does. 3) Set aside at least two nights a month to get back to scrapbooking. It is my creative outlet and produces a wonderful end product. 4) I should probaby start taking vitamins or omega-3's too. I've been wanting to try DS on them, so maybe we'll start together.

It's so easy to make a list of all these things. The hard part will be actually doing them.

Melissa

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-07-2003
Tue, 08-21-2007 - 12:17pm

*I am sorry like it seems like I am just well in a funk. But I guess i am. It has been a whirlwind summer. And I have been really cranky through most of it myself. Crazy work hours. Kids home. Vacations that go by so fast. So much to do and yet feel like I accomplished nothing.
Right now I can't find my car keys and I am pissed at the world. I am cranky. I am yelling at my kids, I am getting nasty at them. Lets face it kids now how to pick at scabs. You can warn them and yet they can keep picking. So I get bad.

I told my husband for the 1000th time I wanted a divorce simply because I can't take his workaholic style where he makes himself so busy he has no time to help me figure out how to improve our house. So many half started/half finsihed projects all over the house. The bill collectors etc.

But I know I don't want to split from my hubby.. But so many times I think about just abandoning him and the kids even just for a couple of days just to try and figure out me.

I know there are so many positives and yet right now I right now I am getting close to my need to rent a friend time again. But yet I feel guilty because it costs money that we don't really have.
So I lurk here.

Rina