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| Tue, 09-04-2007 - 11:16am |
I'm not sure what to do anymore. My 7 yr old son has PDD- NOS and has been in regular classes with special ed follow thru since he was 3 yrs old. His teacher's say he does well in school and plays with other kids and has friends. Then why is it I never see him playing with other kids, he's never invited to these "friends" birthday parties, no playdates, etc. His brother is 8 yr old and plays with all the other boys in the neighborhood, tries to include his brother to no avail, and is always invited to birthday parties. I get so discouraged. He makes comments like "they think I'm an idiot", "I don't need friends", " I just want to play by myself".
I can't get him outside to even "try" to play with the other kids. I can't even get him outside to play with his brother and me. He acts like he is being punished when I tell him no more TV or gameboy, you need to play something else. It is so difficult due to his tantrums that I find myself at a loss. I want to continue encouraging him socially, but don't know how. I guess, as parent's, we all want our children to have friends and to be accepted. It's so difficult to see they aren't. The other children in the neighborhood know he is "different" and only ask to play with his older brother. When I say "he's playing with so and so, but his brother can play", they say,"that's ok, I don't want to play with him". It makes me want to cry....hell, I do cry.
When he is interested in playing with other's he does "weird" things. It's as if he is so anxious/embarrassed to just join in and play, that he finds it less embarrassing to behave oddly or make weird sounds/gestures to get himself noticed. That turns the other kids off. How do you communicate appropriate behavior without making him feel bad about himself?
Any suggestions to help cope, help me help him? I am open to any help at all.
Thanks,
Laura

Laura,
Have you looked into a social skills class for him or some kind of facilitated session for kids with special needs? It sounds to me like he needs someone to facilitate for him and intervene -basically to show him how to behave. This is best done in a safe environment.
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