To get selfish a minute...

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-26-2003
To get selfish a minute...
3
Sat, 09-15-2007 - 10:15am

....does anyone remember life before ASDs entered the picture?

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-28-2007
Sat, 09-15-2007 - 10:53am

Oh Hannah I could have written your post ver batum;)

I think I was ok until Liam hit 2.5 and like you we moved. Also I was teaching at that time so I did have some meaningful relationships and friendships through work. When we moved though it was night and day. I still worked at the same place, but I was in suburban hell now, lots of sahm's who seemed to think all that mattered was the color of their dd's hair ribbons and piano lessons etc etc, Liam was all over the place compared to their kids, and the new daycares were awful with him. It does seem 2-3 are the wake up and smell the coffee years with ASD's. After that the few friends I had were the toxic type,. I did manage to make a good true frind and she will be Roan's Godmother, but as I said other toxic elements were always present. Now I've moved again and if anything that friendship is stronger, ironic eh.

I too miss going out for drinks, dinner with dh WITHOUT any children in tow. I've already told dh for our 10 th anniversary (March 09) I want to go to Savannah for St.Patricks day and stay the night. Can you believe I need 18 months advance notice to get a night away...sheesh. My Mum will fly in from Ireland to watch the kids....I mean common' my babysitter needs to travel 3000 miles...that says it all, lol (bitter cackle lol though).

I need to return to work next August and honestly I am ready. Liam is in school, Cian will be well, somewhere in the public school system (either Kindy or pre-k again) and Roan is going to stay with a fellow asd Mom I met who has a moderately autistic son. At first I really wasn't all that enamoured with her but I have learned to open up a bit more and now realize these last 7 years I have slowly been shutting people out of my life. I need my support network whereve I can get it.

((((Huhs)))) Hannah, have you considered counselling. I went for a bit during the summer and it really helped me identify what I needed and how to get it.

De

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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-18-2006
Sat, 09-15-2007 - 6:02pm

You're sooooo not alone.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-25-2003
Sun, 09-16-2007 - 11:24pm

((((((((Hannah))))))))),


You have every right to be "selfish".

-Paula

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