Saturday's Surprise: Open The Envelop...

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Registered: 03-25-2003
Saturday's Surprise: Open The Envelop...
42
Sat, 03-09-2002 - 11:45am

Saturday's Surprise: Open The Envelope (m)


Write a short story (1,000 words or less) where the main character has the nickname you were given during Thursday’s Field Trip (if you didn’t take the trip here’s the link http://pages.prodigy.net/mlemus/mafiaweb.htm).

Happy writing,

Mac

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Visitor (not verified)
anonymous user
Sat, 03-09-2002 - 4:23pm

Sweet Number...(m)


Angela walked through the fancy foyer of James Penthouse and ran one gloved finger over the cherry Hipplewhite sitting along the west wall. "Nice." she simply stated, trying to sound interested.

She unbuttoned her ivory colored trench coat and exposed her teddy-clad body. She smiled, flipping her long blonde hair back over her shoulder as James perusued her as he walked backwards to the den.

"Now, darlin'" he drawled out, fingering his skinny mustache. "How am I to stay focused if you expose your goods before we get done discussin' business?"

"Ah, Sweetie," she laughed, a sweet tinkling sound that filled the hall. "You'll stay focused, just trust me." She circled one finger around a lace covered nipple. She laughed again when James rubbed himself down south.

They walked into the cherry panelled den and Angela slid down on the black leather chair by the desk as James walked behind it. He flipped a switch and the Salvador Dali painting on the wall opened, giving him access to his safe.

"Now, darlin'" He took out a stack of bills, leaving behind several more. "Let's discuss business..." He turned around and faced her and snapped his mouth shut.

"Now, move over here sweet thing." She pointed her Darringer towards a plastic drop cloth that she had pulled out of her handbag and threw down on the floor.

"Is this something kinky?" He asked, laughing dryly.

"In your dreams. Now, honey, over here." She pointed with her gun again.

He stepped slowly over towards the drop cloth while his eyes darted nervously towards his desk.

"Don't even think about it. I know you have a gun there." She said as she ran her free hand through her hair. "There. Right where your at, stop there." She smiled at him sweetly. "Any last words?"

"You're crazy..."

James fell backwards from the impact of the bullet that hit him right between the eyes.

"They don't call me 'Killer' for nothin' sweetie. I worked hard for that nickname in the Guiliana family." She stepped over his body and started to scoop out the rest of the money. She placed that into the lining of her trench coat. She then scooped out the pearls and diamond jewelry into her handbag.

She pulled out her cell phone from her coat pocket and dialed it. "Okay, Boyd, y'all can come up now. It's time to dispose of the nerd's body." She disconnected and stepped back over James and strolled down the stairway to let in her brother...

The End

Visitor (not verified)
anonymous user
Sat, 03-09-2002 - 5:28pm

Way to go, Sammi!...


You worked intrigue, crime, and your mafia nickname into your story perfectly! Nipples and teddies and sultry southern women, heh heh.

You make it seem effortless. Hope you're having a good weekend,

Eyewrite

Avatar for countrygal23
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Sat, 03-09-2002 - 8:00pm

My SS....Mobster


Rachel pulled the curtain around the small cubicle then she assessed the damage done to her patient, Missy Brace. She viewed her swollen shut left eye, to the deep gash in her cheek to the busted lip. Her shirt was soiled with sweat and had been ripped. Rachel gingerly scanned over her stomach area. She had her roll to her side so she could look at the scratches and bruises on her back.

Rachel asked, “Missy are you ready to leave the bastard?”

Moisture fell from her eye and she answered, “Yes”

“Good, now tell me what happened.”

“Tim came home drunk. Anyway, Kyle, who has a cold, kept crying which made Tim mad. I tried to explain that he was sick but Tim just got angrier. I carried Kyle to the door to leave when he stopped me by pulling my hair.”

Missy sobbed awhile then continued.

“I begged him to let me put Kyle back to bed. As soon as I closed the door he started beating me. But I remembered some of those moves you taught me and I was able to knock him down. He must have passed out or fell asleep cause he didn’t move. I grabbed Kyle and darted out. I swear I’m never going back!”

Rachel said, “You rest while I tend to these wounds then I’ll check on Kyle while the doctor checks you. Try not to worry I’ll explain how and what we’re going to do to keep both of you safe.”

Rachel spent twenty minutes with Missy and Kyle and then she made the phone call. “Terri, meet me at 320 Sommersault at two. Also I need you to get Sherri over here to pick up a patient. You know the plan. Good, see you there.”

At one o-clock a.m. Rachel went to the woman’s public restroom dressed in nurse’s scrubs and emerged as a woman wearing a black wig, glasses, black sweatshirt, leather pants and high heels. She resembled a lady of the night.

Rachel took extra precautions leaving the hospital before she hopped into the waiting taxi. She had the driver drop her off two blocks from where she was headed. She met Terri, who was in disguise nearby at the house address as planned.

Terri asked, “What’s the plan?”

“We’re going to wait until he wakes up then have a friendly chat with him.”

Terri and Rachel traveled to the back of the ranch house and entered through the back door. Rachel switched on the kitchen light. They walked to the living room and spied Tim lying on the carpeted floor. Rachel approached him and checked his neck for a pulse. He had one so he must have passed out.

“I say we wake the bastard.” Terri said.

“Yeah, let’s do that. After seeing what he did to her, I’m more than ready to have a chat.” Rachel said before going back into the kitchen. Rachel came back out carrying a large glass of water, which she poured onto his face.

He glared through bleary eyes and said, “Who are you? What do you want?” then he sat up slowly and then stood.

“I’ve come to kick your ass!”

He glanced at her and Terri’s trim builds then said, “This is a joke right? Come on, who are you and what do you want?”

Terri looked at Rachel then to Tim and shrugged before she saw Rachel had flung her leg out and chopped his legs. Rachel said, “That one was for Missy.”

“Missy what’s this have to do with her?”

“Oh, I don’t know, maybe it’s revenge for the beating you gave her.”

His face flashed crimson as he came at Rachel with his fists clenched. She dodged his blows and landed plenty in return to his overweight build.

He grabbed a table lamp and swore, “You, fuckin bitch! I’m going to enjoy hurting you!”

“You shouldn’t have said that cause now I’m pissed!” Rachel said then proceeded to beat him as severely as he had beat Missy.

Terri pulled her off and handed her the chain links. “If you ever touch Missy again or even try to, I will finish the job, believe me!” Rachel said before they left the house.

They drove off and departed company. Rachel went to bed while Terri went to work.

The curtain was pulled around the small cubicle as Terri assessed her patient, Tim Brace. She handed the chart to the new nurse, Tina. Tina scanned over the wounds. She checked his right ankle and noticed a deep wound that looked like it had been inflicted by a chain link.

She asked Terri, “Did you see that?”

“Yes, that’s the mark of the No Mercy Rebel. Rumor has it only one man tried to hurt his wife again and that man ended up dismembering himself for fish bait while--No Mercy watched, of course that’s just a rumor.” Terri whispered.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Sat, 03-09-2002 - 9:37pm

She meant business, didn't she? (m)


I love the man's southern accent, the sexy killer and of course the "any last words" comment!!! LOL

Great job, Sammi,

Mac

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Sat, 03-09-2002 - 9:56pm

Good one, Maria (m)


That Rachel was one mean chick! I especially enjoyed the lines “I’ve come to kick your ass!” and “You shouldn’t have said that cause now I’m pissed!” The thing I liked best about your SS was the fact you had strong women helping other women. We need more like them in the world. And the last paragraph about No Mercy Rebel was fabulous.

I enjoyed this very much,

Mac

Avatar for countrygal23
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Sun, 03-10-2002 - 12:02am

No nonsense (m)


woman shooter, she was quick and bam!! I like it. It read real smooth and crisp somewhat like a movie.

You got the talent...great job! Maria

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Avatar for jadetigerroses
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-01-2003
Sun, 03-10-2002 - 10:18am

Sammi this was great!! I have no ideas for mine but yours is wonderful. n/t


Have a mystical day,

Jade

Please Pray and Support O

Avatar for jadetigerroses
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-01-2003
Sun, 03-10-2002 - 10:23am

very good, I loved keep up the good work. *nt*


Have a mystical day,

Jade

Please Pray and Support O

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Sun, 03-10-2002 - 11:10am

My SS: The Coin Operator (m)


As the sun peeked through the curtains, Eddie began dressing as quickly as his arthritic fingers would allow. Then shuffled down the corridor to the dining hall, greeting everyone that he passed. Eddie always liked to be finished with his breakfast before his grandson -- who visited at least three times a year, more when he could -- arrived at Mount Dora's Retirement Home. "Morning," he said as he took his usual seat beside Janine. She preferred to get there earlier than Eddie and have their breakfasts waiting for them when he arrived.

"Good morning," she said. "How's your ankle feeling?"

“Still hurtin’. I don't believe a word the doc says.” A few days before he had tripped outside and twisted his ankle. Dr. Aros assured him it wasn't broken but Eddie was convinced it was more than a sprain. As Eddie picked the parsley off his omelet, it reminded him of the herb gardens he used to grow -- back when he had his own house in New York.

"You okay?” Janine asked.

"What, I don’t look okay?” a lazy-grin filled his face.

Clutching a mug of hot tea, she said, “You look like you got something on your mind.”

Eddie answered as he wiped some egg from his mustache. “Oh, I was just thinking of Anthony. He’d found some things I’d stored in the attic. Probably wants my permission to throw them away. And I don’t blame ‘em. When I gave him and Sarah the house, I told ‘em it was theirs.”

Janine patted Eddie on the hand. “Still hurts though? Those are your things.”

Eddie nodded his head, pushing his plate aside. Over the loud speaker, Nurse Crilley announced which visitors had arrived. Eddie got up from the table as soon as he heard that his grandson was waiting at the patio near the Green Room.

After a half-hour of friendly chatting and Anthony telling Eddie about his new job, he finally said, “Grandpa, I wanted to ask you about the box of newspapers I found?”

Waving his hand in the air, Eddie said, “That stuff’s just junk. Throw it out -- ”

“That’s not really what I wanted to ask.” Anthony fumbled into his pocket and pulled out a yellowed-torn piece from the New York Times. “How come you never told me you were Eddie “the Coin Operator” Winstoneno?”

Eddie took the news clipping from his Grandson’s hand. “Well, how do you tell a kid who looks up to you that you’d been a bad guy. The kind of bad guys, I told you to stay away from when you were growing up.” Eddie looked at Anthony. “I guess, I didn’t…I didn’t want you to stop loving me.”

Anthony reached over and placed his arm around Eddie’s shoulder. “There ain’t nothing you could’ve done that would make me not love you. Grandpa, I was just curious.”

“One day I’ll tell you some of the stories, okay?”

“I’d like that.”

Visitor (not verified)
anonymous user
Sun, 03-10-2002 - 11:45am

Awwww, how touching...


so much love between them, it warms the heart. Those are the type of people I try to fill my life with.

One thing - if Eddie had sprained his ankle, would he shuffle okay to the dining table or would he have used a cane or something?

Sweet story,

Eyewrite

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