I didnt touch a drink down in the States.
...good for you on day 11...I'm glad that you have a computer...please keep posting...I am sorry to be nosy Heidi, but I can't remember the reason behind not going to AA for a bit (at least)...you're going to have to build yourself a sober network (in real life)...I'm thinking about you...
What scares you about AA?
I too was afraid for the l-o-n-g-e-s-t time to go to AA. I was able to maintain my sobriety for a few years, this board was a wonderful source of strength and comfort....but, eventually, well, life happened.
I don't want to say one thing caused me to drink, I drink because I am an alcoholic..plain and simple.
Maybe I was afraid of living...maybe I was afraid of saying the words outloud."I am Rose, and I am an alcoholic" because once those words were out., I truly had to admit it to myself.
By the Grace of God., I slipped for only a few days....but, they were awful. My daughter who really didn't see me actively drunk years ago did...and I embarassed her. I will never, and don't want to ever forget how she looked, the hurt and anger she felt toward me...and that, I know was pushing my husband to the edge.
I had to do something...had to...I had tried every other stinking thing, yet, I drank..I wanted to live., I wanted to be happy, joyous and free..I wanted my life back.
On October 19th, 2009, I walked into the rooms of AA and for the first time in years of winging this on my own.I finally realized what Brenda, Leslie, Beth and Paul had experienced in their lives. I was home...these people were just like me.They have provided me with a roadmap for the journey of life.
So...why did I ever wait so long...who knows.
I am just thankful that I found a solution to this problem I have.
Try it Heidi...you have nothing to lose, and a life to gain.
Thank you Leslie and Brenda..
That seed was planted by you lovely women (and Paul). My sponsor, well, if they come any better then she is, then, I cannot imagine it.
Another "God shot". The first few meetings I attended a woman named Grace kept coming up to me asking how I was, etc. I knew I needed to get a sponsor, but, trusted that when the time was right, somehow,, it would be revealed to me. One day, Grace asked did I have a sponsor...I told her no. She took my hand and lead me over to Ms. P..."grace" led me to her.
My home group noon lunch meeting is wonderful..it has been growing just in the few months I have been attending. The spiritual connection is what I cannot but into words..it is just what this alcoholic needed.
Brenda.,..I have given her
I think I am afraid of change?